PTSD Patrol: What is in your dash?

It is the middle that matters

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 17, 2019

When you look at your dash, there are a lot of things it can tell you. In the center, you see how far you've traveled and how fast you are going at this very moment.

THE DASH by Linda Ellis is one of those poems that is usually delivered when it is too late for the person being remembered to benefit from. It is not so much for the person being buried, but for those gathered to be able to think about their own lives.

This is part of that poem.

"He noted that first came the date of birth and spoke of the following date with tears, but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years."

While we have no control over when we arrive into this world, we do have control over what we do between the dates used to acknowledge we were here at all.

"For that dash represents all the time they spent alive on earth and now only those who loved them know what that little line is worth."

Question; What is your line worth? Can you see it all or is it mostly a blur with symbols you cannot really understand?

This veteran served in Vietnam. We know he was born in 1940 and died in 2008. 

What else happened in between the space of those dates is known only to those who knew him. There were a lot of veterans mixed in with civilians, and for the most part, that is the way they spend their lives as well. Mixed in with people who saw them all the time and never had a clue what they did serving this country.

So what is in your dash? What is missing from it? What can you add to it? The other thing is, if you are thinking about giving up, do you want to be remembered for the way you died? Or do you want to be remembered for what you did in your life?

PTSD Patrol: Asking for help is better than suffering in silence

You are not driving an empty bus

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 10, 2019

Last week on PTSD Patrol Change the Road You Are On I used a video of the road, filmed at 5:00 am, showing how lonely the road can be when there are only a few people on it.

That is the way it can seem when you have PTSD.  You can feel as if you are alone, but the truth is, everyone you know is tied to you in one way or another.

I used the road film because my ego took over. I have been in a lot of pain again because of my back. I didn't want anyone to see me in pain, so, I used that video. Ashamed of myself ever since. Not because of being in pain, but because I wanted to hide it from everyone.

Yes, imagine that! The one who is constantly preaching on letting people know you are hurting, did a lot of work to hide it. No one ever said I was the brightest bulb in the box.

So, yesterday, the pain is actually worse than last week. I apologized for my stupid decision, and then went on to talk about how if you do not #BreakTheSilence, no one can help you because you will not give them the chance.

If you think that deciding to leave the pain by committing suicide, you need to be aware of a so many things, it would take a year to post! 

The first thing is, picture yourself as a bus driver. They do not have empty busses for very long. More and more people travel where the driver takes them. That is the way your life is. 

More and more people are connected to you. Family, friends, people you work with, are all obvious connections, but there are many more. Add to the list of passengers your family members' friends. Your friends' families. Your coworkers' families and friends. See where I'm going with this?

Now, you may think that leaving is best for everyone, but it will hit everyone hard and that pain never leaves them.

It was 19 years ago my husband's nephew, also a Vietnam veteran, decided to leave. When he committed suicide, it was like a dagger in my heart. Again, I felt as if it was my fault because I could not get him to listen to me. Yes, even I could not find the words he needed to hear to give him what he needed to want to fight to heal.

So, I do know what I am talking about with leaving behind a lot of pain. On the flip side, I also know what I am talking about when you are made aware of the fact you can heal and life can get better.

What if he just suffered in silence instead of asking for help? I learned what I know because he told me what was going on...and what he thought I could not understand. I had been through so many times when my life was on the line, it was something I knew all too well. I also knew why I healed.

Aside from all the veterans and families I have worked with over the decades, it is personal to me because of my own husband. We were talking last night about how I was only 23 and he was 30 when we started this ride together. 

There were times it seemed impossible but day by day we made it past all pain and into the winning struggle for an oh-so-much better life together.

You can do it too! Just remember that if you feel like a burden to your family now, leaving them instead of fighting to #TakeBackYourLife will leave them with questions that cannot be answered.

PTSD Patrol Change the road to healing

Change the road you are on

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 3, 2019

Whatever happened to you that started PTSD was out of your control. That is the only way to get PTSD. It hits you! It is not something that started inside of you. It just ended up there.

The fact you have PTSD means you survived something that could have killed you. Isn't it time you started to live like a survivor?

You have the ability to determine your own destiny from this moment on. It is up to you to suffer in silence, more afraid to ask for help, than you were of what set off PTSD in the first place, or, take control of the rest of your life.

Just like learning how to drive your vehicle and control it, you can learn how to drive your life and heal it. Just spend as much time discovering a new way of living instead of spending so much time suffering.

It isn't easy and will take a lot of hard work. Then again, it has not been easy feeling as if all hope has vanished. I can assure you it has not. You just stopped looking for it.

There is still time to change the road you're on and you are the only one who can decide to do it. Once you do, there are people who cleared the way.

Contact PTSD Patrol and let us show you the road that is waiting for you.

PTSD Patrol Empowerment Zone Out of Danger Zone

This is the Empowerment Message for today considering the news is urgent! We need to get them out of the Danger Zone!

No More Excuses!

Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
January 27, 2019

The number of service members committing suicide continues to rise. The number of veterans committing suicide continues to rise. The number of people actually in charge with a clue of what needs to be done, continues to be absent without leave!!!! Yes, they are AWOL!

How is it that there are people all over this country knowing exactly what works, what the troops need to hear, what veterans need to hear, YET WE ARE NEVER HEARD BY THOSE IN CHARGE? How is it that we have known what works for decades but the "experts" are clueless? 

They come up with slogans when we come up with results. They come up with excuses, when we come up with plans.

What makes all of this worse for us is, we know there is absolutely no need of all this suffering when they could be healing and still serving.

This is totally unacceptable because all of these suicides were preventable!

Suicide rate among active-duty Marines at a 10-year high

CNN
Barbara Starr
January 25, 2019

"While there is no dishonor in coming up short, or needing help, there is no honor in quitting. For those who are struggling ... our Marine Corps, our families, and our Nation need you; we can't afford to lose you." General Robert Neller

(CNN)The number of confirmed and suspected suicides in the active-duty Marine Corps reached a 10-year high in 2018 with 57 cases, according to new Marine Corps data obtained by CNN.

The United States Marine Corps emblem hanging on a wall at the Joint Detention Forces Headquarters at Guantanamo Bay US Naval Base, Cuba, April 09, 2014. AFP PHOTO/MLADEN ANTONOV

Another 18 Marines in the Reserve forces either are confirmed to have committed suicide or their deaths are being investigated as suspected suicides.

Marine Corps sources say the service is concerned that 2018 may have seen 75 suicides even with the extensive mental health programs available. Many of the cases are young Marines who have not deployed overseas and have not been in combat -- a situation that has been seen in other branches of the military as well.

"Don't make them just numbers," one Marine Corps official pleaded when making the data available to CNN.
read more here

Yet again, one more reminder that when the DOD bought all the FUBAR "resilience" BS, they failed to notice that if it did not work for those who did not deploy, THEN IT WOULD NOT WORK FOR THOSE WHO WERE DEPLOYED MULTIPLE TIMES!!!

Here are a couple of videos from a Marine veteran with PTSD. Listen to him and know that you can #TakeBackYourLife and live stronger!

Kathie Costos DiCesare
Published on Dec 31, 2016
This is Jonnie. He has survived three attempted suicides and spent time as a homeless veteran. A year ago, he never thought he would be where he is today. He is healing and he wants to make sure other veterans get the message of something worth living for instead of the message spread about suicides. Spend next year healing and let this New Year be the year you begin to change again, only this time, for the better!

Kathie Costos DiCesare
Published on Mar 11, 2018
Sunday morning empowerment zone features Marine veteran filmed yesterday at the Orlando Nam Knights bikeweek party. His simple message is empowerment! Take control of your life from this moment on. It's up to you where you go from here!

Kathie Costos DiCesare
Published on Apr 14, 2018
My buddy Jonnie has been fighting to take his life back from PTSD. He is doing everything possible to make his life better. Working on his mind, his spirit and his body! He is at the American Combat Club in Downtown Orlando.

Kathie Costos DiCesare
Published on Jul 22, 2018
PTSD Patrol Sunday Morning Empowerment Zone Jonnie shares his message of getting in control over the road you choose to be on. You can sit back and feel miserable as a victim or you can choose the road to heal as a survivor.

Cross posted on Combat PTSD Wounded Times

Raising awareness is the wrong lane to be in

Stay out of the wrong lane

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January 20, 2019

This morning I was thinking about how people in the wrong lane of traffic can mess up everyones ride.

I go into work at 5 am, which is great most mornings. With only a few cars on the road, it is really a nice commute. That is, until I get behind someone without a clue where they are going, and blocking the passing lane.

That happened Friday. The driver in the right lane was obeying the speed limit. The driver traveling in the passing lane was doing a little under the speed limit. There was no safe way to pass either of them.

Soon there was a group of us trapped behind them.

That is the way it is in life too. You are having a nice trip until someone gets in your way and blocks the road ahead of you, making it take longer to get to where you need to go.

If you are hearing about how many veterans someone thinks committed suicide today, you need to wonder what their point is. Who does it help when they just guess? How serious is the subject them when they cannot answer any questions? 

The most obvious question they should have been finding the answer to, is, "What will change the outcome?"

They did not even bother to find out first. So they get into the lane of people trying to changed the outcome and lead the way into healing. People like me end up being trapped behind them with no safe way to pass them.

They need to stop blocking the road until they actually deserve to be there. Avoid them like any other road hazard.

It is time to take another road! The one that will take you to a happier life!