Why is focusing on the spiritual needs of people with PTSD is important?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 24, 2021

There seems to be a lot of confusion out there about what faith is in America is now. This shows in the drop of people attending buildings of worship and the rise in suicides.

Why is focusing on the spiritual needs of people with PTSD is important? PTSD hits the emotional part of our brains. That is where our souls live.

Considering how many groups popped up all over the country because of the report from the Department of Veterans Affairs about veterans committing suicide, the fact that more Americans commit suicide without much attention at all.

A lot of them had PTSD but did not find the hope and help they needed to heal. We know this by all the reports of military, veterans and first responders with PTSD committing suicide. What we are not reminded of as often, is how many civilians give up too.

Suicide is a Leading Cause of Death in the United States
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) WISQARS Leading Causes of Death Reports, in 2019:

Suicide was the tenth leading cause of death overall in the United States, claiming the lives of over 47,500 people.
Suicide was the second leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 10 and 34, and the fourth leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 35 and 44.
There were nearly two and a half times as many suicides (47,511) in the United States as there were homicides (19,141).

That was the last report they have listed. Right now no one is sure how many with all the turmoil this country has gone through over the last couple of years, but one thing is clear, there is only one reason people commit suicide. They lost hope that life could get better. Losing the ability to believe in that, even just for a little while, takes away hope.

If they cannot find hope that the next day can be better, and no one gives it to them, it is a battle they lose. This is why suicide awareness does not work. It robs them of hope, putting a spotlight on all those who gave up on their own lives...and everyone else.

Less than half of Americans attend worship service now according to Gallop

People leave the building when they do not find what they need inside of it. Usually there are many reasons but the basic one is, they had a problem big enough they felt drained instead of filled as they walked out the door.

People also confuse the building with God Himself. They tend to believe that God wants nothing to do with them, or turned away from them, and they abandon that relationship entirely. Once that link to what they believe in has been severed, a piece of them is empty.

If this has been the case for you, then please know that you do not have to be in a building, or a group, or pledge anything to anyone for the privilege of praying. You can talk to God wherever you are, wearing whatever you are wearing and speak in your own words.

If you doubt this, remember, Jesus prayed outside most of the time. When He delivered the Sermon On The Mount, it was not in a building. It was on top of a hill.

Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount

5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2 and he began to teach them.
The Beatitudes
He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

If you read the rest of it, then you'll see how much else we get wrong all the time. Notice the difference between what He was preaching when the leaders of the Hebrew people were were saying something totally different.

Don't blame God for what people do. Don't think He turned away from you, just because some people made you feel as if you didn't belong with them.

Today's feature video is Kris Kristofferson, Why Me.

Kris Kristofferson Biography

He believed that songwriting is a spiritual communion of mind, body, and soul, and he believed that William Blake was correct in asserting that anyone divinely ordered for spiritual communion but buries his talent will be pursued by sorrow and desperation through life and by shame and confusion for eternity.

“(Blake) is telling you that you’ll be miserable if you don’t do what you’re supposed to do,” Kristofferson said in the Ken Burns’ documentary Country Music.

Kristofferson’s devotion to spiritual communion brought much in the way of sorrow, desperation, and misery, but it led to triumph.

Maybe it is time to fill yourself back up with hope by discovering what you can still hope for?

Years ago, I did a video because a lot of veterans thought that they were being punished by God because of PTSD. It is called PTSD Is Not God's Judgment. I have no idea why it is age restricted but that is the link to it.

I hope it helps. That is the video today because I don't think I can explain it any better today than I did in that video.

Why Me

Kris Kristofferson

Why me Lord, what have I ever done

To deserve even one

Of the pleasures I've known

Tell me Lord, what did I ever do

That was worth loving you

Or the kindness you've shown.

Lord help me Jesus, I've wasted it so

Help me Jesus I know what I am

Now that I know that I've need you so

Help me Jesus, my soul's in your hand.

Tell me Lord, if you think there's a way

I can try to repay

All I've taken from you

Maybe Lord, I can show someone else

What I've been through myself

On my way back to you.

Lord help me Jesus, I've wasted it so

Help me Jesus I know what I am

Now that I know that I've need you so

Help me Jesus, my soul's in your hand.

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Kris Kristofferson

Why Me lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

 

Bonus from A Star Is Born

why I always do the videos from my garage

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 23, 2021

(This is for the new PTSD Patrol site to explain things the new readers may not know. If you already know all this, then please just enjoy The Beatles video)

My name is Kathie Costos. For decades I was known as Namguardianangel. I couldn't afford the website anymore, so I had to let it go. In 2007 I started Wounded Times and in 2017 PTSD Patrol began as a way to change the conversation from doom and gloom to hope and healing.

You may wonder why I always do the videos from my garage. That is because that is where my vehicle rests. We know so much more about the vehicles we drive, than the one we live in. This is a way to explain it.

(Today's video is a long one to explain it to people who discover this on the new site. You may learn something too.)

The only thing I didn't cover in the video was why I use music. It changes our moods. It puts words to what we feel but cannot communicate. The other reason is, it reminds us that other people felt the same way too or they wouldn't have been able to write the lyrics. Another reason is, I never drive without the radio on!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

HELP

The Beatles

(Help!) I need somebody

(Help!) Not just anybody

(Help!) You know I need someone

(Help!)

When I was younger so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured

Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways

My independence seems to vanish in the haze

But every now and then I feel so insecure

I know that I just need you like I've never done before

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

When I was younger, so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured

Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

Help me? Help me? Ooh

Genius.com

Thank you for your patience

 

My new site for PTSD Patrol is up and running. Still some tweaking to do, but it is almost where I want it to be.

New email is Kathie@ptsdpatrol.com

While working on the new site, I thought about starting a new blog but decided this one has already been established, so it will remain open.  I should begin to start posting again in a day or so.

Thank you for your patience.

"Can you imagine how I feel today?"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 15, 2021

"Can you imagine how I feel today?" is a question no one would have to ask if they talked...and someone listened. No relationship can last if they do not talk to each other about a hell of a lot more than dinner or who does what chores.

How many times have you been out to eat and look around, seeing most of the people looking at their cell phones instead of talking to the people they are with? The social media people are getting all their attention but not the person they are with. It is really bad when young parents are on their cellphones while their young child is throwing french fries at other tables. (Yes I saw that a time or two.)

A lot of relationships end with just regular problems. Add PTSD to the trouble list along with refusing to talk about what is going on and you end up causing a lot of imagination overload for your partner. They know you're hiding something, but since you won't tell them, they start assuming it has something to do with them.

If you are pushing them away at the same time you are not talking, which happens a lot, then you may get it sooner than you think when you push them too far away...and they walk away,

Can you imagine how they feel today? Today the featured video is Cliff Richard, We Don't Talk Anymore. 

There must have been a time when you did talk and actually acted like you wanted to spend time with them, not with distractions. There must have been a time when you actually looked into their eyes when they talked to you as if they deserved your attention. Above all, there must have been a time when you trusted them enough to share what was on your mind.

How about you try to do all that again before they walk away from you?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

We Don't Talk Anymore (2001 Remaster)

Cliff Richard

Used to think that life was sweet

Used to think we were so complete

I can't believe you'd throw it away

Used to feel we had it made

Used to feel we could sail away

Can you imagine how I feel today?

Well, it seems a long time ago

You were the lonely one

Now it comes to letting go

You are the only one

Do you know what you've done?

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore

It's so funny, why we don't talk anymore

But I ain't losing sleep and I ain't counting sheep

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore

Oh, we don't talk, ooh

Well, it really doesn't matter to me

I guess your leaving was meant to be

It's down to you now, you wanna be free

Well, I hope you know which way to go

You're on your own again

Don't come crying to me when you're the lonely one

Remember what you've done

Oh, it's so funny how we don't talk anymore

It's so funny, why we don't talk anymore

But I ain't losing sleep and I ain't counting sheep

No, no, no

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore, anymore

Oh, we don't talk anymore

Ooh, we don't talk anymore

But I ain't, no, losing sleep

No, I ain't counting sheep

No, no, no, no

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore, anymore

Oh, we don't talk, oh, we don't talk

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: A Tarney

We Don't Talk Anymore (2001 Remaster) lyrics © Sony/atv Music Publishing (uk) Limited 

When you feel your life's too hard

PTSD Patrol

Kathie Costos

June 14, 2021

I was searching for a video on the need to talk when I heard Stevie Wonder, Have A Talk With God. The line, "Never communicating with the One who lives within," really got me. I was thinking about all the times someone told me they have a hard time asking for help. I'm not sure if they are ashamed they need it, or ashamed of not having anyone to ask for it.

In my case, I have no problem asking for help but no one I know can help me with what I need help with, so I talk to God. Who am I kidding? Pretty much I talk to Him about everything! He has been in my life all my life and the only one I have trusted all my life. It is hard to not trust Him considering He already knows everything about me. Sometimes I trust Him more than I trust myself.

He won't blab to someone else about what you told Him in secret. He won't laugh at you. He will comfort you. He will forgive you if that is what you need or guide you if you are lost and don't know what to do, but most of all, He will help you forgive others and find peace with letting go of things you have no control over.

If you have PTSD, the cause of it was out of your control. You need to let go of the "would" "could" and "should" thoughts filling your brain with self blame. You are haunted by the past and need to peace to move forward without being stuck looking in the rearview mirror.

The other thing is, if you ask to be shown the way toward healing, He will guide you there. Consider the directions from the Heavenly GPS, God Plain and Simple!

Stay away from anyone who tells you something like, "God only gives us what we can handle," because that giving you the thought that He did it to you. They actually expect you to pray to Him after they just told you He did it on purpose? God will give you what you need to get through it!

Think about it this way, others went through things that you are going through and their hearts were tugged to help others get through their own struggles, knowing they are not alone. Who do you think tugged their hearts? He did and they were willing to listen. Are you willing to ask?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Have a Talk With God

Stevie Wonder

There are people who have let the problems of today

Lead them to conclude that for them life is not the way

But every problem has an answer, and if yours you cannot find

You should talk it over to Him

He'll give you peace of mind

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Many of us feel we walk alone without a friend

Never communicating with the One who lives within

Forgetting all about the One who never, ever lets you down

And you can talk to Him anytime, He's always around

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Well, He's the only free psychiatrist

That's known throughout the world

For solving the problems of all men

Women, little boys, and girls

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

When your load's too much to bear

Just go talk to God, He cares

(I know He does)

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Thank you

Thank you very much

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Wonder Stevie / Hardaway Calvin

Have a Talk With God lyrics © Jobete Music Co., Inc.

when we are no longer remembered

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 13,2021

Everyone will die one day. Famous people become part of history. For most people, someone will remember them, for as long as they live, but a day will come, when we are no longer remembered.

Conversely, to blot out a person’s name was to destroy that individual for all eternity, to eliminate him from the historical record.
Death Ancient Egypt

The thing is, what you do here on earth, never dies. Your name may be forgotten, but every life you touch, passes that on to others. They touch more lives and it spreads far beyond what you can see, beyond people you know, far more than you realize and much longer than you breathe.

Today's featured video is Casting Crowns, Scars In Heaven.

Matthew McConaughey Reads 1 Corinthians 12 12 27

We are all part of one body and each part of the "body" has a job to do, while we live. When someone we love dies, according to the Bible, there is no pain, sadness, or any bad memories. They will take all the good with them and it will live on. All the love they receive, joy, happiness and wonderful memories live on. There are no scars in Heaven. Maybe our job, instead of wanting to be remembered, is to have what we do remembered long after we are gone?

When we do something for someone else, it changes them. When you have PTSD, most of the time, it was caused by someone else. You know what that pain is like and how it changed you. Hopefully by now, you also know what it is like to have those scars healed because someone did something for you. They showed you that you do matter, and helped you heal the scars.

You can turn around and pass that on for them and they will change the other people in their lives by living a happier life. That gets passed on and on and on, long after they are gone too, but the number of lives you changed will never stop being changed.

Look at what happened because people decided to spread the messages of love that Jesus delivered. The 12 Disciples names are written in the Bible but there were 72 others also sent. No one knows their names but they had spread the messages to many more than the 12 did. What they delivered spread across the world and to generations of the generation they preached to. What you do when you live spreads too.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Scars in Heaven

Casting Crowns

If I had only known the last time

Would be the last time

I would have put off all the things I had to do

I would have stayed a little longer

Held on a little tighter

Now what I'd give for one more day with you

'Cause there's a wound here in my heart

Where something's missing

And they tell me that it's gonna heal with time

But I know you're in a place

Where all your wounds have been erased

And knowing yours are healed is healing mine

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven

Are on the Hands that hold you now

I know the road you walked was anything but easy

You picked up your share of scars along the way

Oh, but now you're standing in the sun

You've fought your fight and your race is run

The pain is all a million miles away

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven, yeah

Are on the Hands that hold you now

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

For the Hands that hold you now

There's not a day goes by that I don't see you

You live on in all the better parts of me

Until I'm standing with you in the sun

I'll fight this fight and this race I'll run

Until I finally see what you can see, oh-oh

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven

Are on the Hands that hold you now

Source: Musixmatch 

Love helped Orlando heal after Pulse stopped

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 12, 2021

Five years ago, a man so filled with hate, decided to murder 49 people and wound 53 more. He did not know them. He did not know who they were, what they did or anything other than the fact he hated them so much, he decided to slaughter them.

The survivors acted out of love for the people they were with and for total strangers. They helped one and other escape to a place where they could hide, if they could not get out of the building. Some of those killed, died saving someone else.

People who were not there, decided to respond out of love to do what they could to help. They rushed with their cars and trucks to take the wounded to hospitals. Police Officers and SWAT teams showed up, putting their own lives in danger to stop the man from killing more.

When it was over, when the sun came up, officers were walking around where the dead still laid on the floor with their cell phone ringing. The officers would be forever haunted by the sounds of someone trying to reach someone they loved to see if they were still alive...or not.

People in the area, joined together to donate blood. Thousands of people did whatever they could to help, not knowing if they were risking their own lives, because no one knew if there would be more people so filled with hate, they were ready to kill too. Strangers showed up to give people in line food and something to drink as they stood in the heat patiently waiting their turn to do whatever they could.

Money came in from all over the world to help the families bury the people they loved and to help the survivors with their medical expenses, lost wages and every other price they paid because they were targetted by hatred.

Crisis Intervention teams showed up for the families of those who died, for the survivors and for the responders. Mental Health professionals lined up to provide free trauma care.

Love won that day, as it usually does. When one person, or a few, decide to act out of hate, millions respond with love.

Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount

5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him,

2 and he began to teach them.
The Beatitudes

He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

That is a list of people who are blessed. None of it is easy but all of it is based on love.

Salt and Light
13 “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.
15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.
16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

When people pretend they are doing something in the Name of God, or in the Name of Jesus, this is how you know if they are telling the truth or not.

Love for Enemies
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’
44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?
47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

This can be especially hard, but consider what Jesus was facing, knowing He would be put to death for the sake of those He Loved, and yet He preached all about Love. It is more powerful than anything else there is.

Today the featured video has no lyrics. It only has names of the people murdered 5 years ago at the Pulse Nightclub. One man decided to murder them, but thousands responded with love!

Five First Responders to the Pulse Massacre. One Diagnosis: PTSD.

by Abe Aboraya, WMFE June 11, 2018

Pulse was one of the nation’s largest mass shootings, where 49 people died and at least 53 others were wounded. The invisible injuries to first responders represent another toll of the catastrophe.

For these five first responders — and many others — June 12 was the first day of their new lives, one in which they would confront post-traumatic stress disorder. Even though most had responded to gruesome scenes of murder, suicide and car accidents, that didn’t prepare them for the psychological injury of PTSD. Going forward, they would relive that day in flashbacks and nightmares, see danger behind every closed door, and become irritable and impatient with spouses and coworkers.

“There are just some events that are so horrific that no human being should be able to just process that and put it away,” said Deborah Beidel, a University of Central Florida professor who runs a clinic called UCF Restores that treats first responders with PTSD. read more here

And that is what happens when people who risk their lives to respond to what hatred does. But love helps them heal too!
I interviewd Dr. Beidel a few years ago.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from PTSD

Don't miss "the miracle of the moment"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 11, 2021

Why is it that we want to change what has already been done, unsay what has already been said and change the path we chose to take, only to discover it was a huge mistake? We can't change a damn thing that happened up do a second ago. Still none of us have to settle for what came from all we got wrong because we can change this second onward. That is the "miracle of the moment. Today's featured video is Steven Curtis Chapman, This Moment.

Yes, you can change and you have the power to do it. Do you feel bad about something you said? Then apologize and say something better. Give the person you said it to a chance to accept your apology but, understand that it has already been said. It may take time to rebuild whatever relationship you had with them. At the very least, if they do not forgive you, you opened the door to begin to forgive yourself for just being a human who was wrong.

Sure it sucks to be wrong but it sucks more to stay wrong. Change now by learning from your past because that is all it is good for.

Part of having PTSD is being on guard. Hearing more than someone actually said, and taking it as a personal attack against you, or overblowing everything, causes a rift that could destroy a relationship. When you understand that, then you can think about how you react in the furture, but it does not change what has already been done. Only you can do that by making new memories for them, and yourself to overpower the bad memories you have. You can start this moment to make a miracle for your future.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

This Moment

Steven Curtis Chapman

It's time for letting go

All of our if only's

'Cause we don't have a time machine

And even if we did

Would we really want to use it

Would we really want to go change everything

'Cause we are who and where

And what we are for now

And this is the only moment

We can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

There's only one who knows

What's really out there waiting

In all the moments yet to be

And all we need to know

Is he's out there waiting

To Him the future's history

And He has given us

A treasure called right now

And this is the only moment

We can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

And if it brings you tears

Then taste them as they fall

And let them soften your heart

And if it brings you laughter

Then throw your head back

And let it go, let it go, yeah

You gotta let it go

And listen to your heartbeat, yeah

Breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

Breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Matthew Bronleewe / Steven Curtis Chapman

Miracle of the Moment lyrics © BMG Rights Management 

Wish them well and then tell them to go to hell

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 10, 2021

Yesterday I had some personal things to do. To tell the truth, I needed a mental health day too. I am glad I did. I was looking for music to use today when I came across Disturbed Stronger On Your Own. As I listened to it, I started to think how I am stronger, and happier on my own.

When I lived in Florida, I was involved with a lot of veterans groups. I really cared about them, but there was something that was in the way of getting close to them. Politics! I listened to them say how much they hated things I believed, without them knowing what I thought. Some people on the other side, were OK and didn't seem to put it first above all else and we stayed friends. I kept my mouth shut with the others as they went on and on about their views, anger, bitterness and hatred. I still cared about them but it hurt.

I kept thinking that if they knew what I thought, they'd hate me too. I was right. When I moved to New Hampshire, it was lonely. We had a few friends and our daughter was here, we were also closer to other family members. Then the pandemic hit and things got shut down. It got even lonelier.

I got stronger! I looked back at how I hid what I thought as if I had anything to be ashamed of, when I didn't. 

This has gone way beyond simple political differences. I used to really enjoy a good debate but it did not cause as much hatred as it has the last ten years or so. Now it is as if we are so filled with it, nothing else matters to far too many.

If you have PTSD and you are dealing with this political BS, walk away. We've all heard crap over the years, especially about what people want to believe. There were decades when people thought PTSD was not real and if you are a veteran, you probably heard someone say that you were only out for a free ride, a government paycheck and it was all BS. I'd love to hear one of them say that to a civilian with PTSD, especially when the percentage of people denying it is still higher than those who admit it. The stigma and crappy attitude is alive and well because facts are still damned and people like to hear what they already believe.

If you are surrounded by people who do not think the way you do, then walk away. Listening to them will rob you of healing and get in the way. You should not have to change what you believe to fit in with someone who has shown you they already hate you, even though they never heard it from you.

It is a hinderance to your recovery. Wish them well and then tell them to go to hell. It is better to be on your own until you find others who do think like you, believe what you do, or, at least accept you as you are. 

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Stronger on Your Own

Disturbed

Everybody has a story to tell

Listen closely now and you can hear mine as well

I was addicted to breaking my heart

I couldn't get enough of feeling it torn apart

So conflicted, in feeling the pain

I say I've had enough but still want it all again

I won't deny

I tried to hide it

But it was killing me inside

And now I

Feel un-whole

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your

Stronger on your own

I've created my own personal hell

Come inside with me and you can be mine as well

This affliction will blacken your heart

I keep believing as it's tearing my soul apart

Self-destruction is the name of the game

I say I've had enough but still want it all again

I won't deny

I tried to hide it

But now it's killing me inside

And now I

Feel so cold

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your own

And when you're able to decide

Then you don't want this anymore

You'll be the one to turn the tide

For you are stronger on your

Stronger on your

Stronger on your own

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your own

And when you're able to decide

Then you don't want this anymore

You'll be the one to turn the tide

For you are stronger on your

Stronger on your

Stronger on your own

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Dan Donegan / David Draiman / Kevin Churko / Mike Wengren

Stronger on Your Own lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

why should you join a support group

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 8, 2021

Today I posted about how Wounded Times (my other site) reached over 5 million page views. I wrote that All that work was worth it because it was but for a long time, I didn't feel that way. I was getting less and less comments, hardly no feedback, and I started to think that it just didn't matter anymore. It hurt.

Now I know better but believe it or not, that is one of the reasons why you should join a support group. I know it sounds like a strange leap, but hear me out.

It was lonely and it got harder to find a reason to keep doing something that was healing for me. Knowing I was making a difference, was like a gift I gave myself. When you have PTSD and are doing the work alone, it is great but there comes a time when you need the positive feedback from others. Face it! We all have an ego. Feed your ego!

Think about it this way. If you were really overweight and put in a lot of work to lose it, but moved to a new town where no one knew you, they wouldn't know what you did or how hard you worked at it. Yet, if you went back to where people knew you, they would let you know how proud they were of you, congratulate you on it, and yes, feed your ego. It is like a gift you give yourself.

Being in a support group, gives you that positive feedback, support and inspires you to keep doing the work of healing. When you are healed, you can give that to others too, because you know what it was like when you did it, just as much as you remember what it was like to do it alone. That is a gift you give to others, but also, a gift you give to yourself.

On a personal note, I want to thank the people who stuck with me on Wounded Times, even if I don't know who you are. I am also grateful for the people passing on the work for PTSD Patrol. Reaching over 100,000 page views was because of you being willing to do that.
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Make Your Own Kind of Music

The Mamas and the Papas

Nobody can tell you

There's only one song worth singing

They may try and sell you

Cause it hangs them up

To see someone like you

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You're gonna be nowhere

The loneliest kind of lonely

It may be rough going

Just to do your thing is the hardest thing to do

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

So if you cannot take my hand

And if you must be going, I will understand

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own kind of song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own kind of song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

No no no no

Even if nobody else sings along

If nobody else sings along

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Barry Mann / Cynthia Weil

Make Your Own Kind of Music lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

All that work was worth it

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
June 15, 2021 

(From my other site)

"The loneliest kind of lonely" is when there is no one else like you. I know that feeling because when I started working on PTSD, I didn't know anyone like me. It was lonely because we didn't have the internet and the only information I could find was at the library reading clinical books. Nothing strange about that since it was in 1982.

In 1993, I finally got a computer and then I found other people talking about PTSD. I started my first site on AOL, then it was on a website where I went by NamGuardianAngel. Back then, since I was unique, I had a lot of emails and phone calls. There were even more when I wrote my first book in 2002.

In 2006 I started making videos on PTSD on YouTube and in 2007, I started Wounded Times.

All that work was worth it even though it was never to make money. Sure I wanted to at least break even but the thing was, the work itself kept me going. Getting feed back and reading messages let me know, it mattered to the people I was trying to help.

In 2007 I posted a massive post about suicides hoping that someone with the power to do something would. Once all the groups started to pop up all over the internet and social media, the emails and messages started to go down. I was reading more and more about veterans suffering and very little being done to help them. The problem was, they were doing something about it by using them to make money.

I didn't give up and made more videos, posted more and tried to reach out as much as possible. It got lonelier and lonelier. In 2017 I started PTSD Patrol hoping that with PTSD in the title, I could gain control over the conversation again, and give veterans hope and families understanding.

Last year, it was too much for me, reading the reports of suicides going up in the veterans' community and within the military itself. My heart was breaking. I decided to stop focusing on them and started to open the work up to anyone with PTSD. PTSD Patrol passed 100,000 page views recently.

read more on Wounded Times

"Live your truth and know you're not alone"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 7, 2021

A while ago I heard from an old friend. She had been on a bowling team and was really good. Whenever we went, she said I was comedy relief because I was so bad at it. Some of the members of her team started to get political. They were saying things that was horrible. She felt more and more uncomfortable whenever they got together because she was so shocked they felt the way they did. She walked away.

She stopped doing a lot of other things. She went to work and then went home. That was all she did. Someone suggested to her that since there were a few other members of the team who walked away, she should contact them so they could go bowling again and just have fun. It was easy to assume they felt the same way she did. She was right. They started to go bowling and out to eat once a week. They were having so much fun, and few members of the old group wanted to join them.

The new little group didn't want them. The others had already said what they did and expressed how they felt, so trust was gone. They forgave them, but they didn't want to constantly be questioning the others, wondering what they thought and ending up feeling uncomfortable around them all over again. They decided to just be true to themselves.

When you have PTSD, people saying horrible things comes with it. You can forgive them, try to explain it to them and hope they change, but all too often, the trust is gone and what they said echos in your mind. Forgive them and walk away. Let them find people who think the same way they do and you do the same, because you'll be a lot happier.

Today's featured video is Sarah McLachlan, In Your Shoes. Be true to yourself and surround yourself with people who will accept you as you are. I know what it is like because for years I had to keep my mouth shut when others said terrible things around me. I knew if I said what I thought, they'd hate me and I was a right. When I finally freed myself from them, they attacked me for speaking my mind. I kept my mind and lost them from my life. It was liberating! I am a lot happier now.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

In Your Shoes

Sarah McLachlan

You turn the radio on play your favorite song and cry... cry

You let it all disappear push back the doubt and fear they try... try

To hold your head under the waves but you're breathing all the same

You are stronger than their hate

Time for you to walk out walk in your own shoes

Lay down your footprints wherever you choose

Leave it all behind and move on you are your own woman

You never asked for trouble but you've got fire that burns so bright... bright

You turn and face the struggle when all the others turn and hide... hide

You hold your head above the waves above the war they try to wage

You are stronger than their hate

Time for you to walk out walk in your own shoes

Lay down your footprints wherever you choose

Leave it all behind and move on 'cause you are your own woman

Time for you to walk out walk in your own shoes

Lay down your footprints wherever you choose

Leave it all behind and move on you are your own woman move on yeah

Time for you to walk out walk in your own shoes

Lay down your footprints wherever you choose

Say what's on your mind with pride 'cause you are your own woman

You've got a light that always guides you

You speak of hope and change as something good

Live your truth and know you're not alone

You turn the radio on play your favorite song and sing out so loud

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Sarah Ann Mclachlan / Pierre Marchand / Luke Doucet

In Your Shoes lyrics © Tyde Music, Southern Music Pub. Co. Canada Ltd. 

Healing to me be myself again

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 5, 2021

Keeping with the theme of the last few days, it is a good time to talk about being thankful. Today's featured video is Sly And The Family Stone, Thank You.

If you only focus on what was done to you that caused PTSD, that is all you'll see and it will contribute to feeling miserable. It is better to focus on what was done for you and then you end up healing, being happier and the people around you will be happier too.

I am thankful for God and for all the people who came to help me after each time something horrible happened. Right now, I am also thankful for the therapist I had many years ago for being myself again.

I knew I needed help because I was walking around feeling angry most of the time and frustrated. That isn't me. While I do have a temper, I am a typical Greek on that one. It takes a lot to get me angry, I explode and then I want to hug. It was always over and done with.

That is how I knew this was not "me" so I asked my primary care physician to recommend someone I could see. I called a few of them but when I asked if they knew about PTSD, the first few did not. Then I ended up with a woman who was an expert at the time. She was a family therapist. I told her that I was not interested in saving my marriage. I was more interested in not killing my husband. She laughed and I knew she knew exactly what I was talking about.

Little by little I started to feel the angry leave and I felt more like myself again. We talked about my husband and the work I did, all the people I was helping, but I didn't focus on me. I wish I had and then maybe she would have seen I had PTSD too. It was because of my ex-husband but I didn't have time to focus on that or what he put me though.

Anyway, in between appointments, she wanted me to write about what I needed to say. At first it was a page, then a couple, then more, until one appointment I handed her 35 pages. She took it and said, "Well obviously I'm not reading this right now."

During the next appointment, she handed it back to me and told me I needed to turn it into a book. I did and that was For The Love Of Jack. She really helped me be myself again.

If you focus on you, and get the help you need to heal, then you'll be thankful too for being yourself again. The people in your life will be happier too!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Thank You

Sly And The Family Stone

Lookin' at the devil, grinnin' at his gun

Fingers start shakin', I begin to run

Bullets start chasin', I begin to stop

We begin to wrestle I was on the top

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Stiff all in the collar, fluffy in the face

Chit chat chatter tryin', stuffy in the place

Thank you for the party but I could never stay

Many things on my mind, words in the way

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Dance to the music

All night long

Everyday people

Sing a simple song

Mama's so happy

Mama start to cry

Papa still singin'

You can make it if you try

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again (oh yeah)

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Flamin' eyes of people fear, burnin' into you

Many men are missin' much, hatin' what they do

Youth and truth are makin' love

Dig it for a starter

Dyin' young is hard to take

Sellin' out is harder

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Thank you for lettin' me be myself again

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

I want to thank you for lettin' me be myself again

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Sylvester Stewart

Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin) lyrics © Mijac Music 

So where do you find God?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 4, 2021

(part 2 God is closer than you think)

Sometimes when we cannot find something, we search for hours, get frustrated and then find it right in front of us but we just didn't see it. It was there all along. So many people ask "Where was God?" when this happened or that happened. When all they saw was anger, hatred, evil and terrible events, it seemed as if God is on vacation because it happened. If we open our eyes, we find Him in what others do out of love.

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. 

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.

1 John 4:16

Look back at all the horrible images of events and then read about what happened afterwards. Natural disasters destroy and kill, but people respond to rebuild and comfort survivors. Accidents, fires, mass murders and all other terrible events throughout history caused people to respond in mass to do something out of love.

When you think about whatever happened that caused PTSD, and then remember what happened afterwards when people came to help you, then you know God was there too!

When you take remembrance of your own pain, to reach out to help someone else, that is love.

When you remember what it was like when you were lonely, and comfort someone else, that is love.

Whenever you do anything, no matter how small it may seem, to show someone they matter, that is love, and God is there.

June 12th 2016, Pulse Nightclub massacre

Vigils have been held around the country for the victims of the Orlando nightclub attack on June 12. Thousands of people, including Jennifer Ware (right) and Mary Ware, took part in a memorial in downtown Orlando a day after the massacre. David Goldman/AP

NPR reported on it with

3 Hours In Orlando: Piecing Together An Attack And Its Aftermath

I lived near Orlando when I happened. There were strangers in that club that night doing whatever they could to save others. Some people were showing up and driving the wounded to hospitals. Police Officers and SWAT teams were risking their lives to stop it. After it was over, the officers were talking about walking around looking for survivors with cell phones ringing non stop. They talked about how hard that was knowing on the other end of the phone was someone searching for someone they loved.

One person decided to do it out of hatred but millions around the world responded out of love. Soon afterwards, people were lining up donating blood in huge numbers. We stood in the heat not knowing if there would be another attack against all of us. It was all still being pieced together but it didn't matter. The people who showed up to help knew all they needed to know at the time....other people needed help. God was there too.

Some members of the clergy were preaching about the sin of people at Pulse more than they were preaching about the murderer. Some members of the clergy have a habit of preaching about hatred and judgement, at the same time they mention Jesus, almost as if they have no clue what Jesus preached. When people left those churches, God was there too, holding the door for them to walk away and leave the false teachers to find true ones.

When you realize that any religious leader is only human, you stop blaming God for what they did, and thank Him for opening your eyes to the love He always had for you. If you remember, Jesus prayed most of the time outside and so can you. You can talk to God whenever you want, and wherever you are. Your soul will know He hears you. Then you can help others know where God is, by what you do out of love!

When you act out of love you realize that God was there all along. So where do you find God? Today the featured video is Larry Fleet, Where I Find God.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Where I Find God

Larry Fleet 

The night I hit rock bottom, sittin' on an old bar stool

He paid my tab and put me in a cab, he didn't have to

But he could see I was hurtin', oh I wish I'd got his name

'Cause I didn't feel worth savin', but he saved me just the same

That day out on the water when the fish just wouldn't bite

I put my pole down, floated around, it was just so quiet

And I could hear my old man sayin', "Son, just be still"

'Cause you can't find peace like this in a bottle or a pill

From a bar stool to that Evinrude

Sunday mornin' in a church pew

In a deer stand or a hay field

An interstate back to Nashville

In a Chevrolet with the windows down

Me and Him just ridin' around

Sometimes, whether I'm lookin' for Him or not

That's where I find God

Sometimes late at night, I lie there and listen

To the sound of her heart beatin' and that song the crickets are singin'

And I don't know what they're sayin'

But it sounds like a hymn to me

No, I ain't too good at prayin'

But thanks for everything

From a bar stool to that Evinrude

Sunday mornin' in a church pew

In a deer stand or a hay field

An interstate back to Nashville

In a Chevrolet with the windows down

Me and Him just ridin' around

Sometimes, whether I'm lookin' for Him or not

That's where I find God

From a bar stool to that Evinrude

Sunday mornin' in a church pew

In a deer stand or a hay field

An interstate back to Nashville

In a Chevrolet with the windows down

Me and Him just ridin' around talkin'

Well, I do that a lot

Well, I do that a lot

That's where I find God

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Connie Harrington / Larry Fleet

Where I Find God lyrics © Sony/atv Tree Publishing, Goes Something Like This Music, Make It Matter Music, Larry Fleet Publishing 

"And since I lost you, it feels like years"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 1, 2021

Relationships are hard under any circumstances. Different personalities, thoughts, needs and wants. They require a lot of work. It is hard to stay and can be hard to leave. If you cared about someone, but felt you had to cut them out of your life, it is hard. What makes it worse is, when you discover you were wrong. Being in a relationship with someone with PTSD is hard. It is damn near impossible when they refuse to get help. It is hell when neither of you know what it is!

A lot of people have spilt up with someone they cared about because there was no hope of restoring a normal relationship, or a functioning one. I've talked to a lot of people over the years who were beating themselves up for ending the relationship...most of the time, their marriages. When they realized they were dealing with PTSD in the one they ended up cutting out of their lives, they try to reconnect. 

It has happened, and there were a lot of happy endings with relationships restored, even if they were different. Sometimes there were other marriages that followed, but at least they were talking. That is a great thing if the couple had kids. Sometimes the couple decided to get re-married because love was still there.

Sometimes it is too late for any of it and regrets cannot be fixed. They can only be forgiven. If you didn't know what PTSD was, and tried to get back in touch with someone, forgive yourself. Understand that you did the best you could with what you knew at the time. Then learn all you can about it to give you the tools to do that. Knowing the cause and what it does will help you understand them, and why you reacted the way you did.

If you are the one with PTSD and you ended the relationship because you didn't understand it, take the time to understand all you can about it now so that you'll understand why they treated you the way they did, as well as why you treated them the way you did. If they won't talk to you, forgive them and yourself.

Today the featured song is The Beatles, You Won't See Me.

You Won’t See Me

The Beatles

While it may be too late to see them...it is never too late to forgive them or yourself.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

When I call you up

Your line's engaged

I have had enough

So act your age

We have lost the time

That was so hard to find

And I will lose my mind

If you want see me

(You won't see me)

You won't see me

(You won't see me)

I don't know why you (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

Should want to hide (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

But I can't get through (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

My hands are tied (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

I won't want to stay (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

I don't have much to say (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

But I'd get turned away (Ooh-ooh, La la-la)

And you won't see me

(You won't see me)

You won't see me

Time after time

You refuse to even listen

I wouldn't mind

If I knew what I was missing (no, I wouldn't, no, I wouldn't)

Though the days are few (Ooooh, La la-la)

They're filled with tears (Ooooh, La la-la)

And since I lost you (Ooooh, La la-la)

It feels like years (Ooooh, La la-la)

Yes, it seems so long (Ooooh, La la-la)

Girl, since you've been gone (Ooooh, La la-la)

And I just can' go on (Ooooh, La la-la)

If you want see me

You won't see me

(You won't see me)

Time after time

You refuse to even listen

I wouldn't mind

If I knew what I was missing (no, I wouldn't, no, I wouldn't)

Though the days are few (Ooooh, La la-la)

They're filled with tears (Ooooh, La la-la)

And since I lost you (Ooooh, La la-la)

It feels like years (Ooooh, La la-la)

Yes, it seems so long (Ooooh, La la-la)

Girl, since you've been gone (Ooooh, La la-la)

And I just can' go on (Ooooh, La la-la)

If you won't see me

(You won't see me)

You won't see me

(You won't see me)

Yeah!

Ooooh la la-la

Ooooh la la-la

Ooooh la la-la

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Paul Mccartney / John Lennon

You Won’t See Me lyrics © Sony/atv Tunes Llc