"Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 9, 2020

"Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own" but it doesn't have to be that way. PTSD demons are only trying to finish the job on you after you survived whatever caused them to invade your life.

They try to take over your days, but you get busy, ignore them as much as you can, but there is a price to pay for that. 

Demons get stronger and wiggle their way into every relationship you have. That is why a lot of Vietnam veterans reported reaching retirement age and ended up shocked they suddenly got hit by PTSD. They didn't notice how their many marriages fell apart because it was easier to just blame the line of ex-wives they left behind and kids who stopped talking to them. As for sleep, turns out they were passing out instead of falling asleep. The nightmares came but they stuffed them so they could ignore them the same way they ignored everything else during the day.

Your life doesn't have to be that way. When you start to heal, the demons lose power over your life. They stop being able to penetrate every part of you and you #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD so that you are able to enjoy your life again.

Much better than letting the demons control you and it is time YOU GOT TO WIN!

Remember, it is your life....get in and drive it!

Lonely is the night when you find yourself alone

Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own

Lonely is the night when there's no one left to call

You feel the time is right, say the writing's on the wall

It's a high time to fight when the walls are closin' in

Call it what you like it's time you got to win

Lonely, lonely, lonely your spirit's sinkin' down

You find you're not the only stranger in this town

Red lights, green lights, stop and go jive

Headlines, deadlines jammin' your mind

You been stealin' shots from the side

Let your feeling's go for a ride

There's danger out tonight, the man is on the prowl

Get the dynamite, the boys are set to howl

Lonely is the night when you hear the voices call

Are you ready for a fight, do you wanna take it all?

Slowdown, showdown waitin' on line

Show time, no time for changin' your mind

Streets are ringin', march to the sound

Let your secrets follow you down

Somebody's watchin' you baby, so much you can do

Nobody's stoppin' you baby, from makin' it too

One glimpse'll show you now baby, what the music can do

One kiss'll show you now baby, it can happen to you

No more sleepin', wastin' our time

Midnight creepin's, first on our minds

No more lazin' 'round the TV

You'll go crazy, come out with me

Feelin' lonely

Lonely is the night

Feelin' lonely

Lonely is the night

Lonely, lonely, lonely

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: William H Squier

Lonely is the Night lyrics © Spirit Music Group 

PTSD Patrol Undefeated

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 8, 2020

There seems to be some confusion on spiritual healing. It is not a matter of going to church or thinking that you are supposed to be "sinless" or perfect.

If you read the Bible at all, you'll know that it is full of a people who screwed up in their lives and yet God used them to make miracles happen.

The fact that you survived something that could have killed you, is a miracle in itself, but too many think it is punishment for something you did wrong...and God sent it to you. How do you pray or talk to God if you think He did it to you? You can't but you can turn to Him once you understand that is not the way it happened.

Every heartache, every doubt you ever had, was something that Jesus knew all too well. He also knew what it was like to be betrayed by those you trusted. To do the right thing and then have people turn away from you, as much as He understood what it was like to feel abandoned by God.

Even as the Son of God, He still asked for help from other people. What makes you so different that you think you shouldn't ask for help too, especially if PTSD hit you because of your job?

It doesn't matter if you screwed up in your life, you can start making a miracle in your own life so you can turn around and begin one in the life of someone else.

Ephesians 6:10-18 New International Version
The Armor of God

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

So if you think you cannot talk to someone here on earth, then talk to Him.  He doesn't want to hear words you read out a book or just repeat something that is not from your heart. He can actually hear what is in your heart, so speak to Him from there and tell Him you are turning to Him for help.

Incubus - Undefeated 

Could there be another universe?

One that wasn't always out to getcha?

And it breaks my heart a little bit

That here I'm like a sleepwalker

Half alive and hanging by a thread

I'm not dead yet

I'm not dead yet, no

I'm bent but not broken

And I'm not dead yet, no

Yeah

Maybe there's a poem in reverse

Spoken and it holds me out forever

Man it breaks my heart a little bit

But love is like a blind archer

Tryin' to shoot an apple off my head

I'm not dead yet

I'm not dead yet, no

I'm bent but not broken

And I'm not dead yet

Not yet

We're undefeated, bent but not broken

No they ain't seen nothing yet

We're undefeated, bent but not broken

Not dead yet

We're undefeated, bent but not broken

No they ain't seen nothing yet

We're undefeated, bent but not broken

I'm not dead yet

I'm not dead yet, no

I'm bent but not broken

And I'm not dead yet (ooh)

I'm not dead yet (ooh)

I'm not dead yet (ooh)

I'm bent but not broken (ooh)

And I'm not dead yet (ooh)

No

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Brandon Boyd / Michael Einziger / Christopher Kilmore / Benjamin Kenney / Jose Pasillas

Undefeated lyrics © Hunglikeyora Music 

Don't raise the white flag and surrender to PTSD

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 7, 2020

There is a lot of confusion on PTSD. Those who have it, but don't know anything about it, deny it hit them. They let other people blame whatever they want, because humans always need something to blame. 

The most logical conclusion is that you have become a jerk...you found someone else, or any other reason they can find to justify the way you are acting. Since you won't tell them, you only have yourself to blame for what they assume. Maybe you don't even know you have it. Isn't it time you found out what is making you do the things you do?

Start with what the MAYO Clinic has and figure out if it is what has been changing you.

If you survived a traumatic event or multiple ones....this could apply to you.

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that's triggered by a terrifying event — either experiencing it or witnessing it. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares and severe anxiety, as well as uncontrollable thoughts about the event.
Most people who go through traumatic events may have temporary difficulty adjusting and coping, but with time and good self-care, they usually get better. If the symptoms get worse, last for months or even years, and interfere with your day-to-day functioning, you may have PTSD.
Getting effective treatment after PTSD symptoms develop can be critical to reduce symptoms and improve function.

Symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder 

Then you have to decide if the people in your life are worthy of you being the best person you can be. 

You are a survivor and there is no way in hell that should mean you should suffer after beating the "devil" of the event that could have killed you. Don't let it destroy you or the people in your life. Fight back...fight to #TakeBackYourLife.

Do what you can to heal and then, make it up to them. You are worth it! They are worth it.

Dido - White Flag (Official Music Video)

156,579,626 views •Oct 2, 2009 

Lyrics

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you

Or tell you that

But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it

Where's the sense in that?

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder

Or return to where we were

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and

Destruction to come back again

And I caused nothing but trouble

I understand if you can't talk to me again

And if you live by the rules of it's over

Then I'm sure that that makes sense

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet

Which I'm sure we will

All that was there

Will be there still

I'll let it pass

And hold my tongue

And you will think

That I've moved on

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

I'm in love and always will be

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Dido Armstrong / Richard W. Jr. Nowels / Rollo Armstrong

White Flag lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Spirit Music Group, BMG Rights Management, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Songtrust Ave 

I Am Broken Too!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 6, 2020

I am so pissed off right now my head is ready to explode! This is not going to be one of those cheery post with a chair dancing song, I picked I Am Broken Too by Killswich Engage for this reason.

I was on Facebook and a veteran friend of mine I've known for decades, posted about "22 veterans committing suicide today" and I flipped out! After 38 years of posting, tracking, treating veterans spiritually, educating and advocating, it meant nothing! Over 500 videos on YouTube, 3 books and way too many posts to count on Wounded Times along with my older sites and I had to read something like this from someone I know? WTF!

If you need help, veteran, family member or anyone dealing with PTSD, I know what it is like to feel lost and alone. I know what PTSD does as a survivor of over 10 events. What it was like for my veteran husband and what it was like for the veterans whose lives I saved! Above all, I know what it is like to need help and NOT FIND IT! So yes, I've been broken, beaten down and still willing to do the best I can everyday because this is something that is in my DNA after all these years.

If you need help, email me woundedtimes@aol.com or call me 407-754-7526. Read the posts on PTSD Patrol and Wounded Times.

You carry this weight trying to cover your mistakes

To make it seem like nothing could ever break you

But I see right through, 'cause I am broken too

In all the same places as you

And if you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds

Reopen my wounds, yeah

I see myself in you (in you)

I know you can make it through

If you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds

In all the right places for you

So now you see the truth that you are broken too

I'll reopen my wounds for you

I keep making the same mistakes, just to feel alive again

It's the only way to break on through

So stop numbing all the pain

'Cause it just won't go away (won't go away)

If you only knew how much I needed you

And if you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds (my wounds)

In all the right places for you

I can see the truth 'cause I am broken too

I am broken too (broken just like you)

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Adam Dutkiewicz / Jesse Leach / Joel Stroetzel / Justin Foley / Mike D'Antonio

I Am Broken Too lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

Roll With It

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 4, 2020

Today the view from the PTSD Patrol garage is a little different because it is snowing and I wanted to let you see it instead of just looking at my face and messy garage.

In case you don't know why I do these videos from the garage, it is because PTSD Patrol is all about helping people understand the vehicle they live in, as much as they understand the one they drive.

You decide when to drive, how fast you go and where you want to go to. You may not understand how that vehicle works, but you know enough to get you from one place to another. You don't have to totally understand PTSD to be able to do the same in your life. All you need is a basic understanding so you realize the power you do have over it.

The only limit is the one you allow. 

If you have been working on healing, there is a time to just rest and "roll with it" and that is why the feature video is Steve Winwood, Roll With It.

"When life is too much

Roll with it, baby

Don't stop and lose your touch

Oh no, baby

Hard times knocking on your door

I'll tell them you ain't there no more

Get on through it

Roll with it, baby"

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it....most of the time but there is a time to just relax!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

 

When life is too much

Roll with it, baby

Don't stop and lose your touch

Oh no, baby

Hard times knocking on your door

I'll tell them you ain't there no more

Get on through it

Roll with it, baby

Luck will come and then slip away

You've gotta move bring it back to stay

You just roll with it, baby

Come on and just roll with it, baby

You and me

Roll with it, baby

Hang on and just roll with it, baby

Hey

The way that you love is good as money

I swear by stars above sweet as honey

People think you're down and out

You show them what it's all about

You can make it

Roll with it, baby

When this world turns its back on you

Hang in and do that sweet thing you do

You just roll with it, baby

Hey-hey

You just roll with it, baby

Come on and just roll with it, baby

You and me

Just roll with it, baby

Roll with it, baby

Hey-hey

You just roll with it, baby

You and me

Just roll with it, baby

Hang on and just roll with it, baby

Hey

Now there'll be a day

You'll get there, baby

You'll hear the music play

You'll dance, baby

You'll leave bad times way behind

Nothing but good times on your mind

You can do it

Roll with it, baby

Then you'll see life will be so nice

It's just a step up to paradise

Just roll with it, baby

Hey-hey

You just roll with it, baby

You and me

Just roll with it, baby

Hang on and just roll with it, baby

Hey-hey

Come on

Roll with me, baby

Hang on, baby

Come on

Roll with me, baby......

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Will Jennings / Steve Winwood

Roll With It lyrics © F.s. Music Ltd., Blue Sky Rider Songs, Emi Music Publishing France, F S Music Ltd, Warner-tamerlane Pub. O/b/o F.s. Music Ltd., Irving Music, Inc. O/b/o Blue Sky Rider Songs, Stone Agate Music Corp