Saturday, January 23, 2021

Faith enough to fight

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January 23, 2021

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
John 13:34-35
If someone hates someone else, that is not how Jesus said they should be. It is OK to hate what people do, but we're suppose to forgive them, just as we want to be forgiven. This is very important when you are trying to heal, especially if PTSD was caused by what some did to us.

I know it is hard, but it was harder to carry that inside of me, consuming room inside my soul where love could have been...should have been. There was a time when anger was taking control of my life and I didn't like myself.

I am basically a happy person. I have a hot temper, but I normally blow up, then let it go. Most of the time I want to hug afterwards. Still, there was a time when I couldn't do that. I knew I needed help. 

My primary care doctor recommended a few therapists who specialized in trauma. I made a couple of calls, but they couldn't even answer basic questions. Keep in mind that I had been researching PTSD, living with it and knew enough to know they did not know enough. Then I made a call to a woman who did know more than basics...she was an expert.

Little by little, the anger was losing power and hope was restoring happiness.  She is the reason I wrote my first book, For The Love Of Jack, His War/MyBattle. It tells the story of our life covering 18 years because it was first published in 2002. I republished in and put in a few updates, but didn't feel the need to update more. I said all I needed to say in it.

We wouldn't still be together if we did not have a deep love. We wouldn't still be together if we did not know how to forgive. I wouldn't have had what I needed to get through any of these years had it not been for God in my heart first.

Don't get me wrong, none of it was easy, but faith made it easier. I did not fight any battle alone and you don't have to either!

Get Together
Youngbloods 

Love is but a song we sing
Fear's the way we die
You can make the mountains ring
Or make the angels cry
Though the bird is on the wing
And you may not know why
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
Some may come and some may go
He will surely pass
When the one that left us here
Returns for us at last
We are but a moment's sunlight
Fading in the grass
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
If you hear the song I sing
You will understand, listen
You hold the key to love and fear
All in your trembling hand
Just one key unlocks them both
It's there at your command
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
Come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
I said come on, people now
Smile on your brother
Everybody get together
Try to love one another right now
Right now
Right now

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jesse Colin Young
Get Together lyrics © Bernard's Other Music, Tenyor Music, Pigfoot Music, Irving Music Inc. 

Friday, January 22, 2021

Don't let PTSD take first place in your life

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January 22, 2021

"Do you know where you're going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you?" If you don't then you are looking at life as it is, instead of how it could be. If you like what you see, then you are part way there to achieving better than this.

If you don't like it, then change it. See yourself as a survivor, because that is exactly what you are. You defeated whatever hit you that started PTSD. You are the one who decides what your life will be afterwards.

Don't let PTSD take first place in your life anymore. You beat "it" so don't come in second place now. There is so much more out there for you if you try to find it. Sitting there won't get you to it. 


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive.
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife From PTSD
Do You Know
Jennifer Lopez

Do you know where you're goin' to?
Do you like the things that life's been showin' you?
Where are you goin' to
Do you know?
Do you get what you're hopin' for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hopin' for
Do you know?
Once we were standing still in time
Chasin' the fantasies that filled our minds
You knew how I loved you but my spirit was free
Laughin' at the questions that you once asked of me
Do you know where you're goin' to?
Do you like the things that life's been showin' you?
Where are you goin' to
Do you know?
Now looking back at all we planned
We let so many dreams just slip through our hands
Why must we wait so long before we see
How sad the answers to those questions can be?
Do you know where you're goin' to?
Do you like the things that life's been showin' you?
Where are you goin' to
Do you know?
Do you get what you're hopin' for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hopin' for
Do you know?
Do you know?

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Masser Michael / Goffin Gerald

Thursday, January 21, 2021

This is how we heal....with hope of better days!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January 21, 2021

I am sure you've heard the term "positive thinking" but I think that should be changed to the power of empowerment thinking. You are the only one with the power to change your life. Do you listen to the people who feed you negativity or do you listen to the people who offer you hope of a better life and better days ahead for you?

That has been the message of PTSD Patrol. Last night that message shined in the Celebration of the Inauguration special. It was filled with inspiring, average people who decided to do whatever they could to make a difference with whatever power they had.

Most of them were young kids. I am sure they had people tell them that it was such a huge problem, they couldn't make a difference, as much as I am sure they have supportive parents helping them. It didn't matter to them how successful they would be, because they knew even changing one life, was worth doing. That is how miracles happen.
 
There were a lot of fabulous singers in this program, and you can watch the whole thing at the bottom of this post. The song that stood out the most for me last night was Better Days. So much power in those few words of assurance that things don't have to suck forever.

Knowing that things can get better is empowering. Seeing others doing it changes lives too because others realize the only limits they have are the ones they put on themselves.

Do you want to listen to people who tell you to just give up because nothing is going to change? Or do you listen to people who inspire you to change what you can?  If you are like me, that will make you want to do it even more...just to prove them wrong!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD


Better Days
Ant Clemons and Justin Timberlake

There's a light at the end of the tunnel
Keep your eyes on the road ahead
But if you're feeling lost in the night
It's okay to cry
Just as long as you hold your head
'Cause we're on our way to better
Better's ahead, better's ahead
It get's worse 'fore it gets better
But better's ahead, better's ahead
Better days are comin' (better and better and better, ooh-ooh)
Better days are comin' (ooh-ooh, better days)
Better days, better days (better and better and better, oh-ooh)
Better days are comin' (better days, better days)
I know you've been kicked down
Slept on, let down, faith gone
Waited for too long for somethin' to lean on (lean on)
You feel weak, just be strong (ooh)
Deep breath, stay calm
If you just press on, press on, press on
You gon' see there's a light at the end of the tunnel (at the end of the tunnel)
Keep your eyes on the road ahead (on the road ahead)
And if you're feelin' lost in the night (lost in the night)
It's okay to cry (it's okay to cry)
Just as long as you hold your head
'Cause we're on our way to better (ah)
Better's ahead (better), better's ahead (ah)
It get's worse 'fore it gets better (ah-ah-ah)
But better's ahead, better's ahead
Better days are comin' (better and better and better, ooh-ooh, I know, I know)
Better days are comin' (ooh-ooh)
(Better days, better days, better and better and better, ooh-ooh)
And better days are comin' (ooh-ooh)
(Better days, better days)
I know you feel left out and stepped on
Keep goin', keep goin'
Shine bright, don't dim yours for no one
Keep goin' higher, and higher and higher and higher
Better days, better days are comin' (better days)
Better days, better days (on their way) are comin' ('cause I know)
Better days, better days (better days) are comin' (yeah)
Better days (comin'), better days (I know)
Better days are comin'

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Anthony Clemons Jr. / Jacob Kasher Hindlin / Justin Timberlake / Kenny Dixon
Better Days lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

(not in the program last night but another empowerment message of hope of better days)
Better Days
One Republic

Oh, I know that there'll be better days
Oh, that sunshine 'bout to come my way
May we never ever shed another tear for today
'Cause oh, I know that there'll be better days
Wakin' up in California
But these clouds they won't go away
Everyday is like another storm, yeah
I'm just tryin' not to go insane
Yeah, and the city shinin' so bright
So many dark nights, so many dark days
But any time I feel the paranoia
I close my eyes and I pray
Oh, I know that there'll be better days
Oh, that sunshine 'bout to come my way
May we never ever shed another tear for today
'Cause oh, I know that there'll be better days
Been wakin' up to a new year
Got the past million miles away
I'm waking up with a new fear (new fear)
But I know it'll wash away
Whatever you do, don't worry 'bout me
I'm thinkin' 'bout you, don't worry 'bout us
'Cause in the morning everything can change, yeah
And time will tell you it does
Oh, I know that there'll be better days
Oh, that sunshine 'bout to come my way
May we never ever shed another tear for today
'Cause oh, I know that there'll be better days
Better days
Better days
Better days
Better days
May we never ever shed another tear for today
'Cause oh, I know that there'll be better days
May we never ever shed another tear for today
'Cause oh, I know that there'll be better days

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Brent Michael Kutzle / John Nathaniel / Ryan B Tedder
Better Days lyrics © Downtown Music Publishing 

If you didn't see IN FULL: 'Celebrating America' - Tom Hanks hosts concert for Joe Biden's inauguration, here it is. It restored my faith in the American people seeing so many others across the country doing whatever they can to help others make it through these hard times. This is how we heal....with hope of better days!

Wednesday, January 20, 2021

stop lying and start healing

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January, 20, 2021

Dealing with PTSD is a lot like current events. "We study the past to understand the present; we understand the present to guide the future." William Lund.

Today we saw the end of something horrible and beginning of something hopeful. The horrible is reminder of what happened a few weeks ago at the same Capitol where the new President replaced the old one on those same steps, in that same building.





Many people realized they had been lied to and that is what caused them to attack the People's House. Families are wondering what happened to people they love that changed them. They are turning them into the FBI, and so are co-workers, neighbors, and others who were there.

First step in healing is to understand why people believe lies. The first reason is they believe the liar and it was something they wanted to hear. If you regret it, then admit it, apologize to those you hurt, and it is up to them to forgive you or not. You won't know what is possible until you attempt to restore the relationship. If they hurt you, then forgive them.


Smiling Faces
The Temptations 

Smiling faces sometimes pretend to be your friend.
Smiling faces show no traces of the evil that lurks within.
Smiling faces, Smiling Faces, Sometimes they don't tell the truth.
Smiling faces, smiling faces tell lies and I got proof.
The truth is in the eye 'cause the eyes don't lie, amen.
Remember, a smile is just a frown turned upside down my friend.
So, hear me when I'm saying
Smiling faces, Smiling Faces, Sometimes they don't tell the truth.
Smiling faces, smiling faces tell lies and I got proof.
Beware. Beware of the handshake that hides the snake, 
I'm tellin' you beware of the pat on the back it just might hold you back.
Jealousy, (Jealousy) misery, (misery) envy.
I tell you you can't see behind
Smiling faces, Smiling Faces, Sometimes they don't tell the truth.
Smiling faces, smiling faces tell lies and I got proof.
Your enemy won't do you no harm, 'cause you'll know where he's comin' from;
don't let the handshake and the smile fool ya.
Take my advice I'm only tryin' to school ya.
Smiling faces, Smiling Faces, Sometimes they don't tell the truth.

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Barrett Strong / Norman Whitfield
Smiling Faces Sometimes lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 



If you are trying to heal PTSD, some people may have lied to you too. Surviving started out as something good, but it went downhill because of lies. Someone may have said something that wasn't true and you believed them. Maybe you told the lies to yourself? Lies, like you are stuck, life isn't going to get any better, there is no hope or you cannot heal. It is time to tell the truth to those who lied to you, and tell yourself the truth too.

The truth is, you can heal step by step, if you keep trying and are willing to do the work. That is why the other featured video today is the theme from Rocky III. He didn't give up. Think about him running up all those steps and reached the top with is victory dance in the first one. That is what healing can feel like for you!

And then imagine what your life can be like by the time you understand you are a survivor!




Eye Of The Tiger
Survivor 
Rising up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive
So many times it happens too fast
You change your passion for glory
Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive
It's the eye of the tiger
It's the thrill of the fight
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger
Face to face, out in the heat
Hanging tough, staying hungry
They stack the odds 'til we take to the street
For the kill with the skill to survive
It's the eye of the tiger
It's the thrill of the fight
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger
Rising up straight to the top
Had the guts, got the glory
Went the distance, now I'm not going to stop
Just a man and his will to survive
It's the eye of the tiger
It's the thrill of the fight
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all with the eye of the tiger
The eye of the tiger

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Peterik James M / Sullivan Frank Michael
Eye of the Tiger lyrics © Wb Music Corp., Sony/atv Melody, Easy Action Music 

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
January 19, 2020

There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. A lot of people are fine being alone. I don't know anyone who is OK with being lonely. That is why the featured video today is White Snake Here I Go Again.

When I lived in Florida, I was involved with a lot of groups. I did a lot for them, doing videos to give them publicity, supporting their events and talking with individual members to help them with their personal problems. The truth is, I never felt like I belonged. I was lonely in huge groups and it sucked.

The thing is, it made me feel like the only way to fit in was to sacrifice what I thought, what I believed and who I was. That is something I have never been willing to do...and never will.

I am involved in a lot of groups on Facebook and it turns out, a lot of people felt the same way. They felt as if they didn't belong anywhere, until they found groups of like minded people, where they could share their thoughts and be supported by others. Most of the time, the new comers to the groups, including me, felt grateful they found a place for them.

If you are struggling with PTSD, then you need to do the same. Find groups where you do feel welcome, just as you are. A place where the people there do what you to change, but only changing from fighting on your own to letting them help you fight to be happier. They are out there.

Groups where they will support you, help you, guide you and then one day, you can do the same for them. Places where the only goal is to help healing take over your life, as you want to live it.

I know what it is like to be alone and it is OK but no one should ever feel lonely when there are so many others out there. After all, that is the reason why I started working on PTSD almost 40 years ago...knowing you are not alone is the greatest gift you can give to yourself!


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

I don't know where I'm goin'
But I sure know where I've been
Hanging on the promises in songs of yesterday
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time
Here I go again, here I go again
Tho' I keep searching for an answer
I never seem to find what I'm looking for
Oh Lord, I pray you give me strength to carry on
'Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams
Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time
Just another heart in need of rescue
Waiting on love's sweet charity
An' I'm gonna hold on for the rest of my days
'Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams
And here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time
But here I go again, here I go again,
Here I go again, here I go
'Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams
Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An' I've made up my mind, I ain't wasting no more time
Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
'Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams
Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: David Coverdale / Bernie Marsden
Here I Go Again lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc 

guide to take back our life

June 26, 2021 The new site for PTSD Patrol  is up and running. New blog posts will begin there on June 27, 2021. This site will remain up.

PTSD Patrol

PTSD Patrol
It is your life, get in and drive it