Kathie Costos
March 6, 2021
Maybe you heard someone say, "Some people don't want to be saved." I'd like to know, "If anyone told them they could be saved or that they were worth saving?" Sometimes that is all it takes to make them want to be saved.
If you heard the saying, "You can't save everyone" then you'll understand how hard it is to see some people suffer, when so many others heal. You wonder why the person in your life wasn't one of happy ending stories.
Just like alcoholics and drug addicts need to reach rock bottom before they are ready to change, some never do. Sometimes you do have to give up even when you still love them.
You wonder all the time if you should have let them walk away or chased after them. Then the other questions start about how hard you tried, if you knew then what you know now, if you had been more patient, if you had been able to do the tough love stuff, if this, if that and the questions never end.
Some of the hardest cases I've had is when I explain what PTSD is and how much power they had over their future, but they expected me to wave a magic wand to make their pain go away. They didn't want to do any of the work on themselves...for themselves.
So what do you do when some people never see the light? You do the best you can and give them a chance to want to live a happier life or not. It is a chance they wouldn't have gotten otherwise.
Most of the time families fall apart because the foundation is not strong. It was built on a fantasy of making themselves feel better and nothing more. Some families fall apart because PTSD got in the way and no matter what they tried to do, no matter what they said, the one they loved decided to just suffer and let the whole family suffer with them.
It is hard! You wonder what else you could have done but the real question you want to find the answer for is, why didn't they do what they needed to do for you?
That is because you are taking it personally. You may want to think that your love should have been enough for them to want to change. You may blame yourself. The truth is, it is and always was about them.
The only thing you can do is learn all you can about PTSD for your own sake. That way you'll understand why they acted the way they did and finally understand it had nothing to do with you. You can stop blaming yourself and put the blame where it belongs. On a past event you had no power over and no power over someone you loved.
Sometimes there are no easy answers. Everyone is different. There are a lot more people than you know who are going through the same thing you are, but they just won't admit it.
Remember it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
I've Been This Way Before
Neil Diamond
I've seen the light
And I've seen the flame
And I've been this way before
And I'm sure to be this way again
For I've been refused
And I've been regained
And I've seen your eyes before
And I'm sure to see your eyes again
Once again
For I've been released
And I've been regained
And I've sung my song before
And I'm sure to sing my song again
Once again
Some people got to laugh
Some people got to cry
Some people got to make it through
By never wondering why
Some people got to sing
Some people got to sigh
Some people never see the light
Until the day they die
But I've been released
And I've been regained
And I've been this way before
And I'm sure to be this way again
Once again
One more time again
Just one more time
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Neil Diamond
I’ve Been This Way Before lyrics © Stonebridge Music, Stonebridge-music Inc., Sony/atv Sounds Llc Obo Stonebridge Music
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