the oldest pandemic this nation has ever seen

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
June 22, 2021

Last year I went to the New Hampshire veterans cemetery for the first time on Memorial Day. As I walked around, I thought about all the veterans in my family who passed away, as well as the two veterans I was walking with. My husband and his best friend are both Vietnam veterans.

When I came upon this memorial, I had to catch a couple of tears falling. The empty place where the service member is saluting, got to me.

It was around that time when I was debating about giving up working with veterans. No matter how hard I tried, or how much I knew, it seemed as if I was fighting everyone I knew in the veteran community. Most of them were latched onto the slogan of "22 a day" and wouldn't let go of the notion that suicide awareness was a good thing to do. How could they believe that letting suicidal veterans hear about others giving up would offer them anything but more despair?

It was too late to change their minds and I had been doing this work for too long to be able to deal with the deadly results of ignorance. My heart was being ripped out every time I read another report of another suicide.

No one wanted to hear what needed to be done, anymore than they wanted to hear about the decades of failures to address the oldest pandemic this nation has ever seen...suicides carried out by those who valued the lives of others so much so, they were willing to die to save them.

I got into all of this in 1982 and focused on Vietnam veterans with PTSD, but the truth is, they had only become the latest generation to join the others going back to when this nation began. What I didn't know back then was there would be more wars.

It felt as if I was fighting this one all alone as soon as people started to read news reports in 2012. Soon after that, the awareness groups started popping up and eroding the ability for veterans to find people like me.

And now, maybe you'll understand why I gave up on what I had dedicated my life to almost 4 decades ago.

read more here

While all the "awareness" people were talking about, a number when they didn't even understand the report it came from, I was talking about changing the conversation. This is from an interview I did in 2012.

That was what they needed to hear, but I guess I stopped being good enough to get them to hear me. 

I fought them until last year and then I opened this up to anyone with PTSD. If you are in the military, a veteran, or a member of any of the responder positions, this work is for you too. No matter what caused PTSD in you, you are still only human like the rest of us.

Today the featured video is Neil Diamond, He Ain't Heavy because helping people with PTSD heal should not be a burden for any of us.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother

Neil Diamond

The road is long with many awaiting turns

That lead us to who knows where,

Who knows where

But I'm strong,

Strong enough to carry him

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

So long we go

His welfare is my concern

No burden is he to bare, we'll get there

For I know

He would not encumber me

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

If Im laden at all,

I I am laden with sadness that

Everyone's heart isn't filled with the gladness

I am alone for one and other

It's so long long road

From which there is no return

While we're on the way to live why not share

And the load doesn't weigh me down at all

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

He's my brother

He ain't heavy

He's my brother

He's my brother

He ain't heavy

He's my brother

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: B. Russell / B. Scott

He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother lyrics © Music Sales Corporation, Music Sales Corp. 

Calling all angels

Wounded Times

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 15, 2021

Today my heart is broken. Two reports about the suicides in the military and veterans community reminded me of the reason I had to give up working with both groups after 38 years. I could not fight alone anymore. Telling the truth and saying what had to be said to save their lives was no longer possible without ripping my heart out on and daily basis.

Despite Congress' efforts and an ever-rising VA budget, there's no evidence the federal government has put a dent in the veteran suicide crisis, with the VA's data showing little change in the suicide numbers each year. (Military.com)

Military suicides are also higher. "The report from the Department of Defense shows our military saw a spike in people taking their own lives. In total, 377 active duty troops took their own life in 2020, across all branches of the military. This is an increase of 8% from the same time in 2019." but when you actually read the report, you notice that the numbers in the following article do not include the 194 "Reserve Components" that are included in the Department of Defense Suicide Report. 511, which has been consistently the average since 2012. If you find that hard to believe, since the media hasn't told you that part, then look at the whole chart on the link and add the two totals together.

"Your mental health impacts more than just you, it impacts everybody around you. And those are things we have to be aware of. You may not want to get help for you but what about for your daughter or for your son. What about for your mother or your brother who has to deal with the things that you were going through," said Williams." (Porsche Williams, the founder of Restore Life Global WUSA9 News)

It became all too clear that the only groups getting support were ranting about "raising awareness" that they were killing themselves. No plans, no facts, just saying it was happening and they ended up getting all the support while leaving people reminded that others gave up too. As if that was going to work when they needed reasons to get up in the morning. They needed hope and they needed the truth, but these groups did not have a clue what they were talking about...but they sure knew how to get attention for themselves.

I do not want to be contacted by one more group wanting money for what they do with results like this. No one should be giving them any attention at all when the results has proven over and over again, hasn't "put a dent in the crisis."

I asked for help from many groups and offered to let them take the credit for what I was willing to show them how to do. They turned me down. Over and over again, I tried to contact members of Congress but they would not listen. I wrote and wrote even more, but thousands of articles later, none of them did much good. Wounded Times has over 4.8 million page views, yet there are few people telling the truth about what has been going on. I have over 700 videos on YouTube and few bother to watch them or share them. 

I am willing to get back into this fight again but only if angels decide to fight with me. I won't fight this alone again. My heart cannot take it. I know what it is like to save lives and trust me, if I can do it, it isn't rocket science. It requires knowledge and doing it for the right reasons. I am calling on angels to help me this time, so all of us can help them heal.

Calling All Angels

Train 

I need a sign to let me know you're here

All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere

I need to know that things are gonna look up

'Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

When there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head

When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

And I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I need a sign to let me know you're here

'Cause my TV set just keeps it all from being clear

I want a reason for the way things have to be

I need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

When children have to play inside so they don't disappear

While private eyes solve marriage lies 'cause we don't talk for years

And football teams are kissing Queens and losing sight of having dreams

In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

And I'm (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

And I'm (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: James Stafford / Scott Underwood / Pat Monahan / Charles Colin

Calling All Angels lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

I started doing videos on PTSD in 2006. The first suicide awareness I did was in 2007 because I thought all that people needed to save lives, was to know it was happening. Putting the video and post together, ripped my heart out, but it was important. I wrote a book about suicides tied to military in 2013 proving all the money and "efforts" did not work, and why they did not work. It didn't do any good.

I did the video Alive Day in 2012 when the reports started coming out. This is what they need to know and this is how we do it!

If you are raising awareness about them killing themselves, you are part of the reason they are gone!

Even if nobody else sings along

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
March 5, 2021 

I've been singing the same tune for almost 4 decades. The beat changes as the mood changes, but the message has not changed. Same message even though too many did not sing along with me. Sorry but I refused to sell out a long time ago, even though joining the groups more interested in raising money would have made it easier on me, it wouldn't have been easier on my soul.

One of the groups who are all about raising suicide awareness contacted me to promote their business. Yes, their "business" as if making money is all that matters to them. Actually that is what they have been all about. Changing the conversation from the doom and gloom has not happened and this is the result. This is from Tampa Bay Times.

The VA noted that data continue to show 132 Americans, including 20 service members and veterans, die on average each day by suicide. And (former) VA Secretary Robert Wilkie stated: “Just as there is no single cause of suicide, no single organization can end veteran suicide alone. 

That is the result of letting people know they are killing themselves. If you Google "suicide awareness" you end up with over 9 million results and most of them are tied to veterans. What about the other Americans who also need help? We've seen that suicide awareness does not work for currently military members any more than it works for veterans. How could anyone ever think it would work on anyone? It can't and it won't but after decades of pretending it will make a difference to anyone, they continue to sing the same tone deaf tune!

I needed something to make myself feel better this morning and then as I started to search for a music video, the incredible voice of Cass Elliot popped into my head. I found the video and as I listened to it, especially the part where she sings, "You're gonna be nowhere,The loneliest kind of lonely,It may be rough going,Just to do your thing is the hardest thing to do, But you gotta make your own kind of music" I felt a lot better.

If you are doing this work for the right reasons and the right way, you are probably lonely too. There is nothing glamorous about it and will not make you wealthy but it does fill your soul. Doing the right thing for the right reasons is never easy especially when you know you can change their world for the better.

When I read a suicide report, or hear about someone who never found what they needed to heal, my confidence gets shattered. I knew I could have made a difference but when I was not given the chance, it makes me depressed. I keep wondering how much more can I do so they find me? How do I compete with people making money off their heartache so they have the ability to reach more and get more money while more are killing themselves?

Yes, I was ripping myself apart until this song got me to stop and think about how it isn't my problem they are getting the attention. One day they will have to answer for what harm they have actually done. All I can do is do my best to get the message out there and help them know they can heal. To understand a happier life is waiting for them if they want it.

So, today this featured video is for us...the ones who are dedicated to changing the conversation from doom and gloom to #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD because they can!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

Make Your Own Kind Of Music 

Cass Elliot, also known as Mama Cass

Nobody can tell you

There's only one song worth singing

They may try and sell you

Cause it hangs them up

To see someone like you

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You're gonna be nowhere

The loneliest kind of lonely

It may be rough going

Just to do your thing is the hardest thing to do

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

So if you cannot take my hand

And if you must be going, I will understand

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own kind of song 

Make your own kind of music
Even if nobody else sings along
You gotta make your own kind of music 

Sing your own kind of song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

No no no no

Even if nobody else sings along

If nobody else sings along

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Barry Mann / Cynthia Weil

Make Your Own Kind of Music lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Veterans inspired to make miracles in the world!

Miracles after attempted suicides prevented

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 17, 2020

Stories collected from Wounded Times

In 2007, Owen Wilson attempted suicide and it was big news, and spread around the world. At the same time, we were facing 948 attempted active duty suicides, along with 99 who lost their lives. It was also the year when many survivors faced charges. A female reservists was facing charges after she survived. She tired again, and again, she survived. The charges against her were dropped and her story showed that her mental health crisis had been pushed aside by her superiors.

"I Sat around numerous times with a .44 in my mouth. But for some reason, I just couldn't pull the trigger. I don't know why." said a 57 year old veteran who had attempted it three more times.

Not long afterwards reports of veterans attempted suicides had grown more than "patient count" in the VA. The eyeopener in this piece of news was the age groups who topped the numbers from 2000-2007. 20-24 year old attempts went from 11 to 47 per year. 55-59 year old attempts also went up from 19 to 117.

By April of 2008, the reports on attempted suicides were increased to 1,000 per month in the VA system.

And then something amazing started to happen. Veterans were talking about their own pain so that others would understand it is not all doom and gloom. 

Two years later, veterans were trying to do whatever they could to change the outcome and encourage veterans to seek healing instead of suffering. That is what Jeremiah Workman did as the recipient of the Navy Cross.

He went on to write "Shadow of the Sword: A Marine's Journey of War, Heroism, and Redemption"

Chaplains were talking about their own struggles so that others would discover that asking for help is part of healing and part of their faith. After all, Jesus was preaching healing and not going it alone. Not to mention He kept asking for help. If the Son of God was not above asking for help...no one should have a problem with it.

Generals were talking about their own struggles with PTSD.

Medal of Honor recipients did a PSA on seeking help to heal PTSD.

Servicemembers were also doing whatever it took to save anyone in trouble. A sailor on the USS Carl Vinson was driving across a bridge when he saved a suicidal man...on his 60th birthday.

Dakota Meyer received the Medal of Honor, but after being home, he tried to commit suicide because he felt as if he had become a burden to his family. He broke his silent suffering knowing he could keep saving lives even back home.

Andrew O'Brien decided to end his silence on YouTube after the tried to commit suicide, knowing others may choose to live.

A Navy Captain decided talking about his own attempt at committing suicide would prevent someone from trying it too.

A female veteran, Mary Dague, lost both of her arms serving as a bomb tech in Iraq, but managed to save the life of another veteran across the country.

Within all the bad news out there, we should all do more than take comfort because of all the people trying to make a difference. We need to share their stories so that others are inspired to make miracles in the world!