I haven't done a post in a while about veterans but this morning as I was searching for the song for the day, Someday Soon by Judy Collins came into my head. Once I listened to the lyrics, I remembered why.
This song came out during the Vietnam War. My husband listened to oldies, just like me and I remembered when I heard this song, I was thinking it could have been about us. No, he wasn't in the rodeo but as the years went by, my parents had a hard time accepting the fact that he did make me happy even though my heart was breaking.
Seeing him suffer from PTSD, and doing whatever I could to help him, broke my heart. Eventually, they started to tell me to get a divorce, even though my Dad was a veteran and spotted it in him the night they met. It was a tough road we were on, but looking back, it was a trip so worth taking.
"My parents can not stand him
Cause he rides the rodeo
My father says that
He will leave me crying
I would follow him right down
The toughest road I know
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon"
So what do you want someday soon?
Some people want to go back to the way their lives were before the pandemic spread out across the world. They want to go out to eat, get together with family, friends and enjoy concerts, plays, parties and go out to the movie theaters. They hang onto hope that will all be possible again...someday soon.
Some people want to hit the lottery, so they play their numbers or buy their scratch tickets faithfully because they are sure it can happen to them. It gives them hope as they dream about what they'll do with the money....someday soon.
For some with PTSD, your someday soon can be living a happier life and it can happen. It can happen if you are will to change what you can..and as the prayer from AA goes, wisdom to access the things you cannot change. What gives you hope about what can come with your someday soon?
This may make you think I'm insane, but if you've been reading these posts or watching the videos....you already figured that one out.
When things were really hard, I could't talk to my friends, because they didn't want know what PTSD was. I would listen to them complain about the finest things, and get so upset as if they were complaining about something enormous...and I'd walk away knowing the difference between ego being bent out of shape, and what it was like to see someone you love suffering.
I couldn't talk to my family as much as I wanted to, because they'd usually listen, then tell me I should get a divorce. There were times when I couldn't brush off their lousy advice, so I wouldn't even open the door to it happening.
I would go for rides and listen to the radio. Most songs are love songs, which was something I didn't really want to hear, even the ones about love gone bad, didn't comfort me.
Then I found myself singing them to heaven. All my life, faith was as natural as breathing. I knew I could talk to Jesus no matter what I was going through, because of everything He went through.
One of the songs that gave me comfort, was Gloria Estefan, I See Your Smile, especially this part.
'Cause I know I have to do this
Would you hold my hand right through it
'Cause when I close my eyes
I still can see your smile
It's bright enough to light my life
Out of my darkest hour
Please believe it's true
When I tell you I love you
It was written about the relationship she had with her husband in the beginning, but for me, it reminds of my relationship with my husband as much as it did with the one I had to Jesus.
I wasn't alone when I talked to Him. I could feel His smile and find peace in my soul, so I knew I was loved. He was the Light in my darkest hours because He filled me with hope.
No easy days, but He made it easier. No quick miracles, but He gave me strength and patience until mini-miracles turned into big ones.
He guided me to where I could learn about what my husband was going through, and what I went through. I gained the power to change by learning what was possible and how to find peace with what was impossible to change. Songs like this got us through all these years....we met in 1982.
Find something that gives you comfort, even if you have to tweak the meaning for what you need out of it.
There are so many things that get left off the list of things to think about during Christmas. Something always gets left off the list. Wrapping gifts, but forgot to buy tags. Wrote out the Christmas cards, but forgot to buy stamps. Buy toys for the kids but since most of them are electronic, they do no good unless you remembered to buy batteries.
You may plan the meal out perfectly but if you left something off the grocery list, the chances are, you'll have to order take out.
Things that started out with good intentions, can end up causing problems. So many things can happen to "ruin" Christmas in normal years, but this year is not a "normal" one for anyone.
The question is, how can not buying something ruin a day to honor a gift that was given in love and free to all who wanted it?
This is supposed to be about honoring the gift from God when He gave the world His Son. The Son Who came to tell the people they were loved and worthy of the Life brought to them.
Oh sure, Christ's life was sent to be sacrificed for all of us, but the life He lived between that day in Bethlehem and the day in Golgotha, He gave the gifts of love, compassion, mercy, forgiveness and hope. He was the Son of God, but even He asked for help to fulfill His mission. He was homeless as He traveled from town to town giving the people the Good News and healing the sick.
From the Bible we know there is nothing that He did not encounter the rest of us live with, including being betrayed, abandoned and abused. He knew what it was like to go hungry too. Christ also knew what it was like to not have everything needed to celebrate a wedding when they ran out of wine, so His first public miracle was turning water into wine. He also knew what it was like to cry.
So why is it that when we run out of faith, and gifts given to us, we never seem appreciate them because we failed to plan on needing them?
Life is hard enough but we make it harder when something that was given to us is put into a a box that is taken out a couple of times a year but collects dust the rest of it. It is a living gift that needs to be fed but we end up letting it go hungry, then wonder why it died.
Time to put this gift on your list so that you can heal your soul and ease your heart. The greatest gifts are not the ones you buy, but the ones you create and appreciate.
What you need to heal PTSD, is there. What you need to be happier, is there. What you need to be a gift to those you love is there. All you have to do is open it up and be open to what you can gain by the greatest Gift the world has ever known.
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
You Say
Song by Lauren Daigle
I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am, because I need to know, ooh oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, oh, You say I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity, ooh oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh, You say I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have and now I'm layin' it at Your feet
You'll have every failure God, You'll have every victory, ooh oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh, You say I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
Oh, I believe (I), yes, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe (oh)
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Jason Ingram / Lauren Daigle / Paul Brendon Mabury
Today the feature video is a quirky song by Opus Life Is Life. My buddy Gunny suggested it yesterday when I mentioned I needed a chair dancing song after a few days of sad ones.
When I listened to it, sure enough, I was chair dancing and having a lot of fun enjoying this group. It got me thinking about how there are all kinds of people in this world. Some of them are just spectators, just watching other people do things and enjoying their lives. Then there are the participants who are doing the doing and the dreaming and the moving....
If you have PTSD, sure, being a spectator is safer but it isn't healing. You heal by participating in your own life. Do what you can to be happier and dream about better days to the point where you stop spectating and start participating!
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
Yes it is snowing again...and we got hammered!
Opus - Life Is Life (Live)
All together now
Live is life
Live is life
Live is life
When we all give the power
We all give the best
Every minute of an hour
Don't think about a rest
Then you all get the power
You all get the best
When everyone gives everything
And every song everybody sings
Then it's life
Live is life
Live is life
Live
Live is life, when we all feel the power
Live is life, come on stand up and dance
Live is life, when the feeling of the people
Live is life, is the feeling of the band, yeah
When we all give the power
We all give the best
Every minute of an hour
Don't think about a rest
Then you all get the power
You all get the best
And everyone gives everything and every song
Everybody sings
Then it's live
Live is life
Live
Live is life
Live
Live Is life
Live
Live Is life
And you call when it's over
You call it should last
Every minute of the future
Is a memory of the past
'Cause we all gave the power
We all gave the best
And everyone gave everything and every song
Everybody sang
Live is life
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Ewald Pfleger / Guenter Grasmuck / Herwig Ruedisser / Kurt Plisnier / Peter Niklas Gruber
