Sunday, February 14, 2021

For those I love

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 14, 2021

Happy Valentine's Day! Since it is a day to celebrate love, this is a special one for those who serve and suffer for it. There is no greater love than to be willing to sacrifice for those you love. Suffering is not part of the deal and it doesn't have to be, if you consider the reason you are hurting.

The desire to serve was engrained in your soul. It comes from a place of courage and deep devotion. It is what drove you to endure the hardships that came with the job you were among the few willing to do. So why are you paying a price for it? Because the power that enabled you to do what you did, holds the same power to harm you. It is a strong emotional core that caused the desire and to feel the pain even more, but it also holds the power to help you heal PTSD.

If you were willing to die for those you love...be willing to heal for the same reason and LIVE FOR LOVE!

Never regret what you did out of love, no matter how others treated it or you. That is not your problem. It is theirs! Most of the time, they lack the ability to love as much as you do, care as much as you do, and they also lack the ability to feel all the good emotions as deeply as you do.

Use that same strength inside of you to heal for those you love and then, live a happier life because of what you did for love!

Remember...it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

I Will Live For Love
Donna Summer

There's got to be a way that I can dream
Simply close my eyes and see
The worlds I've never known
What places that my soul has been 

Sometimes I need to run away and hide
And soar above the clouds and ride
I sail along so high
Till nothing's in my sky
Except the stars that fill my eyes 

And I will live for love
Where ever it may lead
It's written from the start
I know it's face by heart
I will live for love 

I'm searching for the one who holds the key
To all this crazy life I lead
Through galaxies in time
A solitary star that joins 

Sometimes I need to close my eyes and breathe
Inhale what life's been given me
A passion to ignite
A flaming heart a' flight
I close my eyes
I breathe
I'm free 

And I will live for love
Where ever it may lead
It's written from the start
I know it's face by heart
I will live for love 

The poet must have known
A lover of his own
"Cause that is when he wrote
Everything I felt for love 

And I will fight for love in life and life in love
And I will hold to things above
I'm strong enough to slay the dragon dead and there 

I will live for love 

I'm taller than the sky
This dream will never die
So only know that I
I will live for love 

The poet must have known
A lover of his own
That is when he wrote everything I felt for love
I will ever fight
I will live for life
I will live for love

Genius Lyrics

Saturday, February 13, 2021

Healing makes having PTSD easier but "It Don't Come Easy"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 13, 2021

Today I had to go to the car wash. My car was covered with road salt because we've been getting a lot of snow lately. While sitting in the car, watching all the machines take away all the salt, I thought about someone I know going through a hard time. Then I thought how great it would be if all we had to do was get onto a belt, put our body into neutral and have all our struggles washed away.

It don't come that easily. Nothing really comes easy for everyone all the time. That is why today the featured video  is Ringo Starr It Don't Come easy.

When I was in school, some of my classmates seemed to learn everything easily. The wiz kids who usually got straight A's sooner or later, discovered that something would not come easy to them. Some had a hard time in gym. Some had a hard time in art class. For others, subjects were easy but they couldn't hold a conversation.

Having PTSD is not easy. Healing isn't easy either. The thing is, healing makes it easier to have PTSD. Sure, it can be hard at first, but it makes your life easier doing it. Then you can tutor someone having a hard time with this and make it easier on them too.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and#TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
It Don't Come Easy
Ringo Starr 

It don't come easy
You know it don't come easy
It don't come easy
You know it don't come easy
Got to pay your dues if you wanna sing the blues
And you know it don't come easy
You don't have to shout or leap about
You can even play them easy
Forget about the past and all your sorrows
The future won't last
It will soon be your tomorrow
I don't ask for much, I only want trust
And you know it don't come easy
And this love of mine keeps growin' all the time
And you know it just ain't easy
Open up your heart, let's come together
Use a little love
And we will make it work out better
Got to pay your dues if you wanna sing the blues
And you know it don't come easy
You don't have to shout or leap about
You can even play them easy
Please, remember peace is how we make it
Here within your reach
If you're big enough to take it
I don't ask for much, I only want trust
And you know it don't come easy
And this love of mine keeps growin' all the time
And you know it don't come easy

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Richard Starkey
It Don’t Come Easy lyrics © Startling Music Ltd. 

Friday, February 12, 2021

Are you following your turn signals?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 12, 2021

When you are lucky enough to know your purpose in life, it can come with a lot of heartache. It can also come with an inner peace if you look at your purposed in the right way.

A friend of mine is a Presbyterian Minister. She preaches at a church, but she also does a weekly sermon on YouTube called Geeks Of Fatih. These sermons are for those who feel they do not belong in a church but belong in the group of like minded Science Fiction fans. They are blended with that, plus current events and Bible passages. She saw a need and while she was still living her purpose, she adapted to meet that need.

I worked with her for a couple of years while I was Administrator of Christian Ed and she was the youth pastor. She is filling her purpose in the church the same as she is filling it online to this group, filled with  love and true compassion. 

For many years my purpose was to help others after surviving trauma. For 38 years it was helping veterans and their families, then military members, followed by first responders. Because of the pandemic, knowing there were already over 8 million in the US with diagnosed PTSD, it was necessary to open up to help everyone dealing with surviving trauma. My purpose didn't change but over the years, I had to adapt to meet the needs too.


To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven

There are some people who are doing exactly what they were called to do but it is hard when they look at it the wrong way. I am guilty of that myself from time to time. I get angry when I discover my work being used by others, as if it was theirs to just take. But when I get my ego out of the way, I have peace.

Look at it this way. Our purpose has limits. John the Baptist had the job to prepare the way for Jesus, but not to be Jesus. When Jesus sent out the 12 Disciples everyone knows because they were named in the Bible, He also sent out 72 with them. No one knows their names but they are responsible for clearing the way for Christianity to spread.
10 After this the Lord appointed seventy-two others and sent them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go. 2 He told them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.
Luke 10

Do you think they looked back on their lives and thought it was wasted? No because they saw the people face to face, knowing their lives changed because of them. They knew that those people, would also change the lives of others they came in contact with.

All of us can't be superstars or famous or rich. It is not the job of all of us to be the leader of the parades, but all parades need someone to decide where to march and clear the way for the others to get from one place to another.

Are you following your turn signals?

That is why today, the featured video is The Byrds, Turn, Turn, Turn. Live your purpose no matter who supports you because of the One Who Sent You to do it!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Turn! Turn! Turn!
The Byrds

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep
To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to build up, a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together
To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing
To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Peter Seeger
Turn! Turn! Turn! lyrics © T.R.O. Inc. 

Thursday, February 11, 2021

If you want to live a happy life...

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 11, 2021 

There are so many things people are missing because of the pandemic. New parents are sad because they did not get to celebrate the birth of their babies the way they thought it would always be like. They thought they'd be surrounded by family and friends sharing their joy with them, but face isolation, depending on social media to connect them from a distance. The same is being done for other events, like birthdays, anniversaries, weddings and yes, even funerals.

For others, who in their normal lives, they were sociable, and thrived interacting with others face to face. They looked forward to being active in the groups that fed their souls, and now they have to rely on someone deciding to do a Zoom meeting, instead of being able to hug someone.  (I'm a hugger and it sucks.)

For others, they reach out on social media, knowing with so many people listed among their "friends" they are sure to have many people reaching back to comfort them. They share, get some responses from a few, then wonder why they have so many they are sharing their lives with online, only to discover, they were not really their friends.


The years rolled slowly past
And I found myself alone
Surrounded by strangers I thought were my friends
I found myself further and further from my home, and I
Guess I lost my way
There were oh-so-many roads
I was living to run and running to live
Never worried about paying or even how much I owed
Moving eight miles a minute for months at a time
Breaking all of the rules that would bend
I began to find myself searching
Searching for shelter again and again 

When you realize you were surrounded by people you only thought were your friends, it hurts. You think about all the time you spent with them, and enjoyed their company because you thought they cared about you. But when you needed them to show you how much they did care, they walked away from you.

It happened more times than I can count, while it is easy to count on the few friends I do have, because I can always count on them. Those are the friends I try to think about so I can forget the ones who turned out to be nothing more than people I knew.

I got tired of trying to figure out what I did wrong when I was used, betrayed and ignored. I got tired of beating myself up for telling the truth because some of them needed hear it and they attacked me because they didn't want to hear it. It was hard, but I got over it because I got over them.

I take comfort in knowing that I did the right things for the right reasons and do not regret what I did for them. Doing the right thing has never been wrong, even though other people mistreat you for doing it. I know I can rest well at night knowing it was their problem, instead of going against my core beliefs of what was the right thing to do. And I hold my head up high.

That is why the featured video today is Argent, Hold Your Head Up. I can take what comes into my life because of the things I do with my life.

I spent almost 4 decades trying to help people, fellow survivors of trauma heal. I never figured out how to get financial support to keep doing it, even though I asked for help over and over again, but no one found it valuable enough to support, but those who gained popularity ended up getting their financial support instead of me, when they knew me personally. 

I prayed that God would send someone to help me. Many people came into my life and I trusted that was how God answered my prayers. Soon they proved that they may have been sent by God to help me, but they ended up only interested in helping themselves.

Through all of it, all the heartache and self-doubt, feeling like I failed and deserved to be treated this way for a time, the truth kept me going and I held my head up high. While some measure success by how popular you are, how much money you have or how many followers you have on social media, I measure it a different way.

"If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things." Albert Einstein
If you have PTSD, the goal should be healing so you can live a happier life. If you live with someone with PTSD, the goal should be to help them be happier, so you can be too. The rest will come one day because you put the priority on possibilities. Then you can measure success by sharing more joys and many more years together.

I measure it by lives I've saved. To know that I made a difference to them. To know how I treated others better than they treated me. I measure it by knowing that no matter how many roadblocks are put in front of me, there are thousands of others behind me I managed to get over. You can too!

If you want to share your joy, then be joyful of what you have to share with those you can. If you want to find support for what you are lacking, then accept the support you do receive as a blessing. Measure your life by what you give and not by what you get back.

These are difficult times where lies and liars no longer have any shame in them. Family members betray others because they like the lies they hear. They will awaken to the reality that others were telling them the truth all along and some will feel ashamed. If they ask for forgiveness, then forgive them. All the harm they did to you will no longer have power over your life or a place in your soul where love lives.

Hold your head up to get through the trying times and know that better days are coming...

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD


Hold Your Head Up
Argent 

And if it's there
Don't let it get you down,
You can take it.
And if it hurts
Don't let them see you cry,
You can make it.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
And if they stare
Just let them burn their eyes
On you moving.
And if they shout
Don't let it change a thing
That you're doing.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head high.
And if they stare
Just let them burn their eyes
On you moving.
And if they shout
Don't let it change a thing
That you're doing.
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh
Hold your head up, oh

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Bouwens 

Wednesday, February 10, 2021

Hope drug works

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
Feburary 10, 2021

If you have PTSD and are in treatment, then you may be given some drug...or drugs. If you are not, then your drug of choice is whatever you decide to self medicate with. Then there is another type of drug that works better to offer a happier road ahead.
If you are on medication, it may not be working as good as it should or you are having a hard time with side effects that come with it. Someone you know may be doing great on it, but you're not. That's OK. You are not your buddy. You doctor needs to know how you are feeling so they can change what you are on. That is why there are many different drugs for the same condition...no matter what it is.

If you are not in therapy, then you may be self-medicating. Using street drugs or alcohol to get numb, high or pass out because you cannot sleep. All that does it cost you a lot of money, cause trouble with every part of your life and may even shorten your life. It is not making you happier or healthier. Most of the time it may even be making you more miserable, especially if your drug of choice is alcohol. That is one of the biggest reasons you are told to stop drinking if you are on medication for PTSD.

The other type of drug is natural. I call it the Hope Drug and it works. When you have hope that you can be happier, it lifts you up. You have a reason to get up in the morning. That is what we're doing everyday on PTSD Patrol.

Knowing that it will be OK to actually feel things again is a head rush. It won't be just feeling miserable and you'll look forward to actually feeling good things again...because you know you can.

That is why today the featured video is Huey Lewis I Want A New Drug. That is why I am prescribing hope for you today...and everyday!

Remember it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD


I Want A New Drug
Huey Lewis

I want a new drug, one that won't make me sick
One that won't make me crash my car
Or make me feel three-feet thick
I want a new drug, one that won't hurt my head
One that won't make my mouth too dry
Or make my eyes too red
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
When I'm alone with you
I want a new drug, one that won't spill
One that don't cost too much
Or come in a pill
I want a new drug, one that won't go away
One that won't keep me up all night
One that won't make me sleep all day
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
I'm alone with you, baby
I'm alone with you, baby
I want a new drug, one that does what it should
One that won't make me feel too bad
One that won't make me feel too good
I want a new drug, one with no doubt
One that won't make me talk to much
Or make my face breakout
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
I'm alone with you
I'm alone with you, yeah, yeah

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Christopher John Hayes / Huey Lewis
I Want a New Drug lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc 

guide to take back our life

June 26, 2021 The new site for PTSD Patrol  is up and running. New blog posts will begin there on June 27, 2021. This site will remain up.

PTSD Patrol

PTSD Patrol
It is your life, get in and drive it