But the fighter still remains

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 3, 2021

"Still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest." Those words are from today's featured video, Simon and Garfunkel, The Boxer. It is a song about not giving up, no matter how many times you get knocked down.

What is it you want to hear? You probably want to hear that life can get better. That you are a fighter too.

"In the clearing stands a boxer

And a fighter by his trade

And he carries the reminders

Of every glove that laid him down

And cut him till he cried out

In his anger and his shame

"I am leaving, I am leaving"

But the fighter still remains, he's still remains"

What you should disregard is anything telling you to "deal with it" or "give up" or "get over it" because if you survived whatever cause PTSD, then you did because you fought to do it. You didn't give up then and don't have to give up now. You didn't survive whatever it was on your own and you don't have to fight against it by yourself now.

This song always reminds me of people fighting PTSD. You carry the reminder of what caused PTSD and tried to knock you down. It is time to kick its ass!

"After changes upon changes

We are more or less the same"

Most of "who" you were before PTSD, is still all there. PTSD is change and you can change again for the better if you fight to take back your life.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

The Boxer

Simon and Garfunkel 

The Concert in Central Park 

I am just a poor boy

Though my story's seldom told

I have squandered my resistance

For a pocketful of mumbles

Such are promises

All lies and jest

Still, a man hears what he wants to hear

And disregards the rest

When I left my home and my family

I was no more than a boy

In the company of strangers

In the quiet of the railway station

Running scared

Laying low, seeking out the poorer quarters

Where the ragged people go

Looking for the places only they would know

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Asking only workman's wages

I come looking for a job

But I get no offers

Just a come-on from the whores on Seventh Avenue

I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome

I took some comfort there

La-la-la-la-la-la-la

Now the years are rolling by me

They are rocking evenly

And I am older than I once was

And younger than I'll be

But that's not unusual

No, it isn't strange

After changes upon changes

We are more or less the same

After changes we are

More or less the same

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Then I'm laying out my winter clothes

Wishing I was gone

Going home

Where the New York City winters aren't bleeding me

Leading me

To going home

In the clearing stands a boxer

And a fighter by his trade

And he carries the reminders

Of every glove that laid him down

And cut him till he cried out

In his anger and his shame

"I am leaving, I am leaving"

But the fighter still remains, he's still remains

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie

Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie

Thank you, good night

Thank you, thanks

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Edmund John Simons / Thomas Owen Mostyn Rowlands / Timothy Allan Burgess

The Boxer lyrics © Paul Simon Music, Warner/chappell Music Ltd 

"It might seem crazy what I am 'bout to say" about PTSD

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 27, 2021

When you have PTSD, it can make you miserable. It makes it worse when you think that is the only way you can be. The thing is, getting help can make you a lot happier. Then you can change the way your family is feeling about themselves. Yes, you do have that kind of power. If you think you've been making them miserable, then it should be easy to understand that you can make them happier too.

When you are miserable, the last place you want to be is around happy people. Sitting there with your bad mood, surrounded by people enjoying their lives, sucks! If you want to stay in that mood, then you better duck out early. Sooner or later, their good mood will become too contagious to resist.

This morning I woke up at 5:00 in a bad mood. As I struggled to go back to sleep, failing at that made me angry. I gave up and got up, put on a pot of coffee and waited. A song came on the radio that made me want to scream. I could feel my blood pressure going up until it started to come down and my feet started to move. The next thing I knew, I was moving to the beat and felt happy about being up that early.

The song I heard this morning was Pharrell Williams, Happy!

How about you decide that the truth is, happiness is possible for you and then do something to get there? Getting help to heal helps you understand it. It begins to get you to think of ways to change the way you think about being a survivor. It also gives you hope of much better days.

Then, you can be one of the happy people miserable people catch it from!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Happy

Pharrell Williams

It might seem crazy what I am 'bout to say

Sunshine she's here, you can take a break

I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space

With the air, like I don't care, baby by the way

Huh (Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Here come bad news talking this and that (Yeah)

Well give me all you got, don't hold back (Yeah)

Well I should probably warn you I'll be just fine (Yeah)

No offence to you don't waste your time

Here's why

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Uh, bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down

My level's too high to bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down, I said

Bring me down, can't nothing

Bring me down

My level's too high to bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down, I said

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Uh, bring me down (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Can't nothing (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Bring me down, my level's too high

To bring me down (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Can't nothing (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Bring me down, I said

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you (ayy, ayy, ayy)

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you (hey)

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Come on

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Williams Pharrell L

Happy lyrics © Emi April Music Inc., Emi Blackwood Music Inc., More Water From Nazareth 

What I feel has come and gone before

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 26, 2021

It is a wonderful feeling when the person who loves you, understands you. There is no need to explain something to them, because you've already done that and they remember what you said. Knowing you don't have to hide your emotions from them and they will still love you.

Funny, but it seems I always wind up here with you

Nice to know somebody loves me

Funny, but it seems that it's the only thing to do

Run and find the one who loves me (the one who loves me)

What I feel has come and gone before

No need to talk it out (talk it out)

We know what it's all about

This is why the featured video today is The Carpenters Rainy Days And Mondays.

Is there a certain time of the year when you are not yourself? Are there certain weeks when you are having a harder time than usual? Are there times when nightmares and flashbacks are worse without any of your known triggers? Think about when it hit you before. Then think about what happened to you before during that time of your life. Most of the time, it is an anniversary date your mind remembers.

There are many times during the year when I am not my usual self. I don't want to talk. I am usually not hungry during those days and I want to stay in bed. I am not consciously aware of the connection between a date from my past and haunting feeling of dread. The thing that caused all of it is hard wired in my brain and it remembers the day "it" happened, even if I chose to forget it. No one can explain something you don't understand until you understand the thing itself.

Most people have a hard time finding the words to explain things to worried people who love us. Maybe you can explain it to them once, so they understand, and then have a code word for when it comes back. Tell them it is a Monday, since most people get that Monday's suck. Tell them it is a "blue day" for you since most people also understand that too. After all, they have days when they feel blue too.

You need your space. They need to know that it has nothing to do with them or anything they did. As much as you may like to avoid having conversations about what is going on with you, there are people in your life who need to know for their own sake.

Most relationships fell apart because there was too much that was not said. It left people wondering and then searching for reasons followed by blaming what made sense to them. Communication prevents all that from happening.

When in doubt, no matter what happens in your life, always wonder how you would feel if someone was acting a certain way, and what you would want them to do to ease your mind. It works and then you'll be able to experience not making them wonder what's wrong because you already know your relationship is strong...and they already know.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Rainy Days And Mondays

The Carpenters

Talkin' to myself and feelin' old

Sometimes I'd like to quit

Nothin' ever seems to fit

Hangin' around

Nothin' to do but frown

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down

What I've got they used to call the blues

Nothin' is really wrong

Feelin' like I don't belong

Walkin' around

Some kind of lonely clown

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down

Funny, but it seems I always wind up here with you

Nice to know somebody loves me

Funny, but it seems that it's the only thing to do

Run and find the one who loves me (the one who loves me)

What I feel has come and gone before

No need to talk it out (talk it out)

We know what it's all about

Hangin' around (hangin' around)

Nothin' to do but frown

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down

Funny, but it seems that it's the only thing to do (only thing to do)

Run and find the one who loves me (ooh)

What I feel has come and gone before

No need to talk it out (to talk it out)

We know what it's all about

Hangin' around (hangin' around)

Nothin' to do but frown 

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down

Hangin' around (hangin' around)

Nothin' to do but frown

Rainy days and Mondays always get

Me down

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Paul H. Williams / Roger S. Nichols

Rainy Days and Mondays lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group 

Carpenters - Rainy Days And Mondays (Official Video) 

but normal never really existed

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 25, 2021

Why would anyone want to go back to normal? Normal accomplished nothing. Imagine if the first humans settled for "normal" they wouldn't have hunted, gotten into caves or started fires. Someone had to think that things had to change.

Hundreds of thousands of years ago, around 62 miles west of what would eventually become Marrakesh, a group of people lived in a cave overlooking a lush Moroccan landscape. They rested there, building fires to keep themselves warm. They hunted there, sharpening stone tools to bring down animals. And they died there, leaving their bones behind in the dirt. At the time, there would have been nothing particularly notable about these cave-dwellers. They were yet more Homo sapiens, members of a nascent ape species that had spread across Africa. But in their death, they have become singularly important.

“The new finds indicate that Homo sapiens is much older and had already spread across all of Africa by 300,000 years ago. They really show that the African story of our species was more complex than what we used to think.”

The Atlantic

Everything we do and have in our time, exists because people were not satisfied with normal. The food we eat, stated with someone wondering what it would taste like. Had no one invented fire, then eating raw meat could have killed them off. The clothes we wear started with ancient people killing animals, eating the meat, using their bones for tools and their hides for shelter, just as they used their fur for clothing. All the became normal for a while. Then someone else thought of something else to improve what was acceptable. Changing became normal.

Mankind wouldn't have gone from using fire and living in caves, to smart homes with everything electrical operating everything to make our lives easier, had it not been for the desire to change. We wouldn't have gone from walking everywhere, to riding horses, to buggies, to automobiles, trains and planes, if they accepted what was normal.

You may have convinced yourself that normal was working for you before you survived whatever caused PTSD. When you really think about it, you realize that you kept changing things. Changed from being a dependent infant, to adult and in control over your own life. You changed from student to worker and the chances are, you had many jobs because you needed a change...or were forced to. You went from one relationship and friendship to others. It is for sure you are still not wearing the same clothes you were when you were an infant. How many times have you changed the style? How many times have you changed your hairs style? Change is normal.

When you have PTSD, it is also change. Your life changed from what was acceptable for you, to victim, to survivor within seconds. Normal may be something you convinced yourself is something you want to go back to, but normal never really existed. It was habits you felt comfortable with doing. Are you comfortable with your habits now?

The really great thing about humans is they share how to do things. They have an idea that starts with need and then they make it happen. They pass it on and then someone else has a better idea. That pass on that so that others discover their discovery. Life gets easier for everyone until that becomes normal for a while and then, change comes again.

Even you can change again by learning from those who were not satisfied with what everyone else thought was impossible to change. People have been suffering traumatic events since the beginning of time and they paid the price after they survived it. It took someone talk about it and someone else to wonder why, before someone else discovered how to make life better. Now we know that wanting to go back to "normal" is a waste of time. It is far better to want to have a better than normal life.

Mankind's earliest literature tells us that a significant proportion of military casualties are psychological, and that witnessing death can leave chronic psychological symptoms. As we are reminded in Deuteronomy 20:1-9, military leaders have long been aware that many soldiers must be removed from the frontline because of nervous breakdown, which is often contagious: When thou goest out to battle against thine enemies, and seest horses, and chariots, and a people more than thou... the officers shall say, What man is there that is fearful and fainthearted? Let him go and return unto his house, lest his brethren's heart faint as well as his heart. (King Jame's Version ) PubMed Center

That is when the journey from before trauma to after it was documented. Research has been going on for far too long to ignore how dissatisfied people were with accepting it as normal to them. If it is not acceptable to you, then discover as much as you can, then think about how to change it again. How can you change your life, so you can pass it on to others? If you already did, then how did you do it? Everything that started throughout the history of man, has been shared and change, "change is gonna come" again.

Today the featured video is Sam Cooke, Change Is Gonna Come.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

A Change Is Gonna Come

Sam Cooke

I was born by the river, in a little tent

Oh, and just like the river

I've been running ever since

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

It's been too hard living

But I'm afraid to die

'Cause I don't know what's up there

Beyond the sky

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

I go to the movie

And I go downtown

Somebody keep telling me

Don't hang around

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know, a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

Then I go to my brother

And I say, brother, help me please

But he winds up, knockin' me

Back down on my knees

Oh, there been times that I thought

I couldn't last for long

But now I think I'm able, to carry on

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Sam Cooke 

truth changes how you use your power

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 24, 2021

Truth can give you power. That is what the message of PTSD Patrol has been all about. All of us have a lot more power to change things than we think. It is time to turn "Truth To Power" and that is why the featured video today is from One Republic. The thing is, truth changes how you use your power.

Yesterday I received the second COVID-19 vaccine. Today I feel like I have a really bad cold, achy and tired, but sure is a lot better than having COVID. I know I won't have to worry so much about my husband, since he's full vaccinated too. I won't have to worry about passing it on to someone else. I am also thrilled with knowing I can finally get a hair cut in a couple of weeks. Little by little I'll be able to do a lot of things I didn't want to do over the last year.

The thing is, as a Christian and a Chaplain, I tend to want to do more for others than I want to do for myself. It makes me happy to do what I can, when I can, with whatever I have to give. That is why I am so confused how many people refuse to think about others, including the people in their own families.

When they say that they don't want to give up their freedom, they are not looking at the truth that no one has an absolute right to do what they want. There are rules and laws applied to everyone. You have to wear clothes, but you can decide what you want to wear as long as things are covered up. You have to wear shirts and shoes in many businesses for public health reasons. (OK, some of it is because most people don't want to see a lot of people without a shirt on no matter where they are.) The thing is, the rules are laws were put into place for the greater good.

How did this become a battle over freedom? You have the right to decide if you do not want to wear a mask, but you do not have the right to make everyone else cave into you. A store has the right to tell you that if you want to shop there, you have to wear one. You have the freedom to comply or shop somewhere else. Governments have the right to tell you that if you want to go out in public, you have to wear one. You have the right to not go out in public.

You are not forced to get the vaccine but while you want to go back to doing the things you want to do, what you are doing now, is preventing that from happening for everyone else.

There are some people who believe the earth is flat. No matter how many facts you can give them, they need to see it for themselves. Elon Musk needs to give them a ride on one of his SpaceX ships so they can see how round and beautiful this world is. Then they would know that we are all connected.

If you really believe that COVID isn't as bad as you think, then the only way for you to know the truth is to use your power and find out for yourself. Go to a hospital and talk to a nurse who has held the hands of far too many while they take their final breaths because their families couldn't be there. Go to India and see the bodies being burned every day because they cannot control it there. Go online and find family members who once thought that it was some kind of overblown rumor, until they lost someone they loved.

I doubt you are evil. Please take an honest look at the people you love and ask yourself how you would feel if you were the cause of them getting COVID, suffering and either facing a lifetime of health problems, or passing away. Once that happens, then it will be too late to use your power and prevent all that.

Until all of us understand we should use our freedom to choose the power for the sake of others, we will all be weakened standing by ourselves. This pandemic is also spreading PTSD across the world, which is yet another price being paid.

Trauma and the COVID Pandemic

COVID-19 has quickly become a global health emergency resulting in not only physical health concerns but also psychological concerns as people are exposed to unexpected deaths or threats of death. For example, healthcare workers who have close contact with COVID patients are not only exposed to the virus on a regular basis, but they may also be witnessing increased illnesses, deaths, and supply shortages. In addition, patients admitted to the hospital with COVID-19 experience social isolation, physical discomfort, and fear for survival. These exposures increase the risk of developing PTSD. In addition, the risk may further be enhanced during the subsequent weeks when these individuals may lack immediate social support due to the need to self-quarantine. (University of Michigan)

Truth to Power

OneRepublic

I could tell you I was fragile

I could tell you I was weak

I could write you out a letter

To tell you anything you need

I've seen minutes turn to hours

Hours turn to years

And I've seen truth turn to power

If you could see me the way I see you

If you could feel me the way I feel you

You'd be a believer

You'd be a believer

Minutes turn to hours

Hours turn to years

And I've seen truth turn to power

I could tell you I was ageless

But I know you see the light

I could tell you I'm immune to everything

But that's a lie

Dust don't turn to flowers

Skies don't disappear

But I've seen truth to power

Oh, if you could see me the way I see you

If you could feel me the way I feel you

You'd be a believer (believer)

You'd be a believer (believer)

You'd be a believer (believer)

You'd be a believer (believer)

Hard to keep goin' on (hard to keep goin' on)

I said it's hard to keep goin' on (hard to keep goin' on)

It's hard to keep goin' on (hard to keep goin' on)

If you could see me the way I see you

If you could feel me the way I feel you

You'd be a believer

You'd be a believer

You'd be a believer

Be a believer

Be a believer (believer)

You'd be (be a believer)

Minutes turn to hours

Hours turn to years

And I've seen truth turn to power

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Ryan B Tedder / T Bone Burnett

Truth to Power lyrics © Downtown Music Publishing 

Make Someday Today

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 18, 2021

"Let's rewrite an ending that fits." Those words are from Nickelback Someday. If you've been saying that someday you'll get over what #PTSD is doing to you, how long have you been saying it? Someday you'll do something to change. How long are you willing to wait? How long do you think you'll try it the way it hasn't worked before you try another way? Someday?

How about you make someday today? The longer you take to decide it is time to #TakeBackYourLife, the more damage is done. Not just to you, but the people in your life are paying a price too. I've heard enough people say that they thought about committing suicide so they would stop being so unhappy and making everyone else in their family unhappy. It wasn't until they decided suicide would make their family take on a burden of pain they would be paying for with the rest of their lives. So much better to do what it takes to heal, than cover up you never really did from the event you survived.

So if you make changing your goal starting today, then tomorrow you can "rewrite an ending that fits." If you ever saw someone with PTSD at their worst, and then saw them after they healed, it is a beautiful thing to see. It is a testament to the human spirit and what can be accomplished, especially in someone who survived the thing that caused PTSD to hit them.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it! #BreakTheSilence

Someday

Nickelback

How the hell'd we wind up like this?

And why weren't we able

To see the signs that we missed?

Try and turn the tables

I wish you'd unclench your fists

And unpack your suitcase

Lately there's been too much of this

But don't think it's too late

Nothing's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

Well, I'd hope that since we're here anyway

We could end up saying

Things we've always needed to say

So we could end up staying

Now the story's played out like this

Just like a paperback novel

Let's rewrite an ending that fits

Instead of a Hollywood horror

Nothing's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

How the hell'd we wind up like this?

And why weren't we able

To see the signs that we missed?

Try and turn the tables

Now the story's played out like this

Just like a paperback novel

Let's rewrite an ending that fits

Instead of a Hollywood horror

Nothing's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it alright but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

I know you're wondering when

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Chad Kroeger / Michael Kroeger / Ryan Peake / Ryan Vikedal

Someday lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc

And you know you can survive

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 14, 2021

"And you know you can survive" are some powerful words to hear when you don't think you can. When everyone you know will not, or cannot, offer you any hope or support, those words empower you to do more than just survive. They let you know you have the power to do that!

Today the featured video is Mariah Carey, Hero. If you ended up with PTSD because of your job, risking your life for others, or sacrificing for the sake of others, you already know what a hero is, but you are the last one to claim that title for yourself. If you have PTSD because of your "job" then it was much more than a just a job. It was your vocation. Average people do not take those jobs. You are above average.

I used this song in a video from a long time ago, PTSD Hero After War for members of the military, with I'll Stand By You from The Pretenders. In this war against PTSD, you can also be a hero to someone else fighting their own war to reclaim their life. Once you heal, you can stand by them and show them the way. You can encourage them when they have no courage left. You can empower them when they cannot find enough power to get up out of bed.

If your job caused it, understand that humans are not built to withstand the constant onslaught of traumatic events. Most of the people you risked your life for, ended up with PTSD from the event you responded to...one event for them but it was one of many for you.

The thing is, as human as you are, if God put it into your soul to do that kind of job, He also equipped you with everything you need to heal from it. It is built into your emotional core and that core is stronger than others, or you wouldn't have been able to do that job for more than a little while. Most of the people I worked with over the years, had done the "job" for many years and faced so many events they were not even sure which one hit them the hardest.

Now think about what kind of hero you can be to others just by telling your story and sharing your own struggles with them. You are not done serving others even if you had to give up the job that caused PTSD. There are over 8 million Americans with PTSD, that is known about. There are many more who have it by have no idea what it is going on with them and they have not sought out help. You can reach them to and encourage them to seek help to take back their lives from PTSD too.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Hero

Mariah Carey

There's a hero

If you look inside your heart

You don't have to be afraid

Of what you are

There's an answer

If you reach into your soul

And the sorrow that you know

Will melt away

And then a hero comes along

With the strength to carry on

And you cast your fears aside

And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone

Look inside you and be strong

And you'll finally see the truth

That a hero lies in you

It's a long road

When you face the world alone

No one reaches out a hand

For you to hold

You can find love

If you search within yourself

And that emptiness you felt

Will disappear

And then a hero comes along

With the strength to carry on

And you cast your fears aside

And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone

Look inside you and be strong

And you'll finally see the truth

That a hero lies in you, oh, oh

Lord knows

Dreams are hard to follow

But don't let anyone

Tear them away, hey yeah

Hold on

There will be tomorrow

In time you'll find the way

And then a hero comes along

With the strength to carry on

And you cast your fears aside

And you know you can survive

So when you feel like hope is gone

Look inside you and be strong

And you'll finally see the truth

That a hero lies in you

That a hero lies in you

Mmm, that a hero lies in you

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Mariah Carey / Walter Afanasieff

Hero lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Universal Music Publishing Group, Royalty Network 

PTSD Hero After War

If PTSD had an anthem...it should be HELP!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 12, 2021

Most people start singing a song whenever they hear it. They can't help it. It makes them happy to sing it. It is as infectious as it was when it was released in 1965! The song, naturally is the Beatles HELP! It was so popular, they even had a movie with that title. So why is it so much easier for everyone to sing that song, than it is to do it?

If PTSD had an anthem, it should be HELP! How much clearer does it have to be? Why the hell should anyone have a problem asking for help when they need it but have no problem, if they can carry a tune or not, to sing this song loud and clear? Has that ever dawned on anyone?

"And now my life has changed in oh so many ways"

Isn't that what having PTSD is like? Your life does change in so many ways. The thing is, getting help can change your life for the better. Wouldn't it make more sense to actually ask for help to be happier, than it is to settle for being happy singing this song for a few minutes? 

Common sense needs to come back into the conversation we've been having about PTSD because we're all tied of hearing the doom and gloom. All that has done is tell us that we should never expect to be happy again. Where is the hope in that? Someone said that asking for help is a sign of weakness but all that meant was the hope the had was weak and they wanted everyone else to be miserable too!

Isn't it time to stop singing the same tune and start asking someone for help in real life? Someone who can actually help you? Asking for help is normal. It is human. Won't you please, please, ask for help when you need it?

UPDATE I am adding closed captioning to the videos.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

HELP

The Beatles

I need somebody

(Help!) not just anybody

(Help!) you know I need someone

Help!

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured (but now these days are gone)

(And now I find) Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways (and now my life has changed)

My independence seems to vanish in the haze

But every now and then I feel so insecure (I know that I)

I know that I just need you like I've never done before

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me

When I was younger, so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured (but now these days are gone)

(And now I find) now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me, help me, help me, ooh

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: John Lennon / Paul McCartney

Help! lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Downtown Music Publishing

and the movie HELP

And I'm gonna go there free

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 10, 2021

Today the featured video is Jim Croce, I Got A Name because it talks about having a hopeful attitude, "movin' me down the highway...movin' ahead so life won't pass me by." Is life passing you by because you think you're stuck where you are? The only thing that is keeping you from getting unstuck is not knowing you have the power to decide your own future.

There was a time when I couldn't figure out why this song was used in Django Unhained. Then it dawned on me that he was going to where he wanted and was going there free. Free of all that happened to him because he did not want to be limited by the things that he had no control over. He got lucky and found someone who needed his help and then, turned around to help him.

Someone may have the same name as you do. Someone may look like you. Someone may have a story that is similar to your own. The thing is, no one has the exact same life are you do. You may find someone in a support group talking about what their life is like with PTSD, but while part of their story is like your own, it isn't your story.

Sure it is wise to find a support group that focuses on what cause PTSD in you, but remember, it is not a contest. Feel sorry for them, because you know how it makes you feel. Feel happy for them because you know what it is like to begin to #TakeBackYourLife from PTSD. Take the ideas they give you and pass on things you learned to others. Let them hug you when you need it just as you are willing to let them rejoice with you when you start to write the next part of your own story.

(I messed up in this video and said it was "Durango" because I watched too many Westerns...I could have just did another video but I have no problem admitting mistakes I make. It makes life happier knowing I don't have to be perfect and don't have to pretend I am.)

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

I Got a Name

Jim Croce

Like the pine trees linin' the windin' road

I've got a name, I've got a name

Like the singin' bird and the croakin' toad

I've got a name, I've got a name

And I carry it with me like my daddy did

But I'm livin' the dream that he kept hid

Movin' me down the highway

Rollin' me down the highway

Movin' ahead so life won't pass me by

Like the north wind whistlin' down the sky

I've got a song, I've got a song

Like the whirlpool whirl and the baby's cry

I've got a song, I've got a song

And I carry it with me and I sing it loud

If it gets me nowhere, I'll go there proud

Movin' me down the highway

Rollin' me down the highway

Movin' ahead so life won't pass me by

And I'm gonna go there free

Like the fool I am and I'll always be

I've got a dream, I've got a dream

They can change their minds but they can't change me

I've got a dream, I've got a dream

Oh, I know I could share it if you'd want me too

If you're going my way, I'll go with you

Movin' me down the highway

Rollin' me down the highway

Movin' ahead so life won't pass me by

Movin' me down the highway

Rollin' me down the highway

Movin' ahead so life won't pass me by

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Norman Gimbel / Charles Fox

I Got a Name lyrics © Warner-tamerlane Publishing Corp.

Yes, happiness make PTSD miserable

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 9, 2021

I can't help it! In some ways, I am still 12. Doesn't matter I've been that way for over 40 years because it is fun and helps me to have a more hopeful attitude. In some ways I really haven't grown up. One of my favorite movies is Shrek. When I lived in Florida, a bunch of us went to the movies every week. I am a Chaplain, yet one of my favorite grownup movies is The Hangover. I laughed so hard I cried. What made it funnier was the reaction of my friends. They were shocked I didn't hate it and they cracked up laughing too, which made me laugh even more.

Another thing that I think is funny is, I have short term memory loss and so does my husband. That can frustrate the hell out of anyone, but it is how you respond to screwing up that will either make you miserable or laugh a lot!

I bought a Glade air freshener with a light sensor on it and brought it home. It didn't work, so I brought it back to the store. I told them it was defective and got another one. I brought that one home and it didn't work either. My husband came over to me, gave me one of "those" faces and asked, "Don't you have to plug it in first?" I laughed my ass off so much that my cheeks hurt.

The featured video today is Justin Timberlake, Can't Stop The Feeling. When I was looking for the video, I found the one from Trolls. Princess Poppy was asked by a group, "Do you think I can be happy?"

"Of course! It's inside all of us!"

I am never sure why so many survivors of PTSD think that being happy again is not possible for them. It doesn't matter how long ago it happened, or what things were like for you a second ago, because you can change every moment onward. It is all inside of you too! Not just feeling happy again, but each step you take to heal, robs power away from PTSD. It wants you to be miserable. Hell, it not only wants you to be that way but wants you to believe you deserve to suffer instead of enjoy your life.

It wants you to stop doing what you loved to do. It wants you to stop writing, stop painting, stop playing music and stop dancing on your feet or in your chair. Yes, happiness make PTSD miserable and it starts to give up controlling your life. Isn't it time you did stop the feeling misery and started feeling happy too?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Can't Stop the Feeling! 

Justin Timberlake

I got this feeling inside my bones

It goes electric, wavey when I turn it on

All through my city, all through my home

We're flying up, no ceiling, when we in our zone

I got that sunshine in my pocket

Got that good song in my feet

I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops

I can't take my eyes up off it, moving so phenomenally

You gone like the way we rock it, so don't stop

Under the lights when everything goes

Nowhere to hide when I'm getting you close

When we move, well, you already know

So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

Ooh, it's something magical

It's in the air, it's in my blood, it's rushing on

I don't need no reason, don't need control

I fly so high, no ceiling, when I'm in my zone

Cause I got that sunshine in my pocket

Got that good song in my feet

I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops

I can't take my eyes up off it, moving so phenomenally

You gon' like the way we rock it, so don't stop

Under the lights when everything goes

Nowhere to hide when I'm getting you close

When we move, well, you already know

So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So keep dancing, come on

I can't stop the, I can't stop the

I can't stop the, I can't stop the

I can't stop the feeling

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

(I can't stop the feeling)

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

(I can't stop the feeling)

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

(I can't stop the feeling)

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

Everybody sing

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Wanna see you move your body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

Break it down

Got this feeling in my body

Can't stop the feeling

Got this feeling in my body, come on

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Justin Timberlake / Max Martin / Shellback

Can't Stop the Feeling! lyrics © Universal Music - Z Tunes Llc, Tennman Tunes, Dwa Songs 

And now for the grownup video....

PTSD going from hopeless to hope full

PTSD Patrol

Kathie Costos

April 8, 2021

All changes are not good ones. When your life is a certain kind of "normal" for you and trauma hits, that is a bad change from life as you knew it to life facing danger. The second it is over, then there is another change, but this one is good. You went from victim of it, to survivor of it.

Another change comes, which may not be a good one, when you are carrying "it" within you and it tries to take over the rest of your life. If you do not fight to take back control over your life, it keeps trying to take over more of "you" and everything you are.

Now comes another good change. You don't have to submit to it. You don't have to give into it. You do have the power to #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD. Now that you know that, words have more power to heal you, than harm you.

Words are very powerful things. They can change your day and if the word "hope" is heard enough so that you believe it is possible to realize what hope actually means, then it can change your life.

If there is one song that proves how powerful words of hope are, it should be Wind Of Change as a theme song for hope.

Wind Of Change, by the Scorpions is powerful. It is also a controversial song.

Joshua Dudley wrote about it on FORBES New Investigative Podcast Explores The Fall Of The Soviet Union Through The Song ‘Wind Of Change’

"The fervor over the song grew immediately, and it became a worldwide hit and the unofficial anthem of the fall of the Berlin Wall with its sweeping hooks and power ballad riffs and lyrics about the Moskva River and Gorky Park."

Think about that for a second. Those words may very well have changed a nation! So why wouldn't you think that words could bring a good change into your life again? 

There are so many different ways people heal PTSD because each one worked for others. Having different ways, means that if one doesn't work for you, there are others to try until you find the right one for you. Now think about this. If you were supposed to suffer, why would there be any treatments or therapies created in the first place? 

It happened because researchers understood that PTSD was caused by changing from relatively safe conditions into dangerous ones. You had hope of finding safety again.Wanting to get you from danger back into safety, you found it, because you no longer belonged in that dangerous situation. You do not belong in a dangerous situation now or a place where you surrender hope to something you left behind you.

It is time for another change when you go from hopeless to hopeful. Think about what that word means...hope full. Fill up your life with hope and you will be a lot happier! Time to create your own wind of change!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Wind Of Change

Scorpions 

Follow the Moskva

Down to Gorky Park

Listening to the wind of change

An August summer night

Soldiers passing by

Listening to the wind of change

The world is closing in

Did you ever think

That we could be so close, like brothers

The future's in the air

Can feel it everywhere

Blowing with the wind of change

Take me to the magic of the moment

On a glory night

Where the children of tomorrow dream away

In the wind of change

Walking down the street

Distant memories

Are buried in the past, forever

I follow the Moskva

Down to Gorky Park

Listening to the wind of change

Take me to the magic of the moment

On a glory night

Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams

With you and me

Take me to the magic of the moment

On a glory night

Where the children of tomorrow dream away

In the wind of change

The wind of change

Blows straight into the face of time

Like a storm wind that will ring the freedom bell

For peace of mind

Let your balalaika sing

What my guitar wants to say

Take me to the magic of the moment

On a glory night

Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams

With you and me

Take me to the magic of the moment

On a glory night

Where the children of tomorrow dream away

In the wind of change

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Klaus Meine

Wind Of Change lyrics © Bmg Rights Management Gmbh (germany) 

PTSD is more than a feeling

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 6, 2021

PTSD is so much more than a feeling. It is life changing from a life threatening event. It would be a great start in the right direction if people understood that, then maybe, they'd stop telling people to "just get over it" as if they don't want to. It doesn't matter to them if "it" happened to them ten, twenty, thirty or forty years ago. If they had a flashback, it just happened to them all over again. I don't know anyone who wouldn't pay to go back to to the way they were before or to the life they had before. I don't know anyone who wants to just stay the way they are. The problem is, they have no idea, while it is impossible to go back to the way they were before, it is very possible to have a better life.

It is like losing someone you knew very well. It is like losing yourself. That is why today the featured video is Boston, More Than A Feeling.

I think the song resonates so much because everyone has lost someone in their lives. Some of us have also lost ourselves!

Be the help they need to heal and if you are healing, from more than a feeling, then celebrate! The second song from Boston is, Don't Look Back. You are not going that way anymore and you're too busy looking forward to a happier life!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

More Than A Feeling

Boston 

I looked out this morning and the sun was gone

Turned on some music to start my day

I lost myself in a familiar song

I closed my eyes and I slipped away

It's more than a feeling (more than a feeling)

When I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)

And I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)

'Til I see Marianne walk away

I see my Marianne walkin' away

So many people have come and gone

Their faces fade as the years go by

Yet I still recall as I wander on

As clear as the sun in the summer sky

It's more than a feeling (more than a feeling)

When I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)

And I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)

'Til I see Marianne walk away

I see my Marianne walkin' away

When I'm tired and thinking cold

I hide in my music, forget the day

And dream of a girl I used to know

I closed my eyes and she slipped away

She slipped away

It's more than a feeling (more than a feeling)

When I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling)

And I begin dreaming (more than a feeling)

'Til I see Marianne walk away

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Tom Scholz

More Than a Feeling lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group 

And when you heal...don't look back, you're not going that way anymore!

Don’t Look Back

Boston

Don't look back, ooh, a new day is breakin'

It's been too long since I felt this way

I don't mind, ooh, where I get taken

The road is callin', today is the day

I can see, it took so long just to realize

I'm much too strong not to compromise

Now I see what I am is holding me down

I'll turn it around

Oh, yes, I will

I finally see the dawn arrivin'

I see beyond the road I'm drivin'

It's a bright horizon, ooh, and I'm awaken

I see myself in a brand new way

The sun is shinin', ooh, the clouds are breakin'

'Cause I can't lose now, there's no game to play

I can tell there's no more time left to criticize

I've seen what I could not recognize

Everything in my life was leading me on

But I can be strong

Oh, yes I can

I finally see the dawn arrivin'

I see beyond the road I'm drivin'

Ooh, far away, I'm left behind, left behind

Oh, the sun is shining

And I'm on that road

Don't look back, ooh, a new day is breakin'

It's been so long since I felt this way

I don't mind, ooh, where I get taken

The road is callin', today is the day

I can see, it took so long just to realize

I'm much too strong not to compromise

Now I see what I am is holding me down

I'll turn it around

Oh, yes I will

I finally see the dawn arrivin' 

I see beyond the road I'm drivin'

I'm far away and left behind

Don't look back

Don't look back

Don't look back

Don't look back

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Scholz Tom

Don’t Look Back lyrics © Pure Songs, Hideaway Hits