guide to take back our life

June 26, 2021

The new site for PTSD Patrol is up and running. New blog posts will begin there on June 27, 2021. This site will remain up.

trauma in the night

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 25, 2021

Right now, most people are talking about the missing in Surfside Florida. The ten year old boy rescued has just discovered his mother is one of the people who died. First Surfside condo collapse victim identified as Stacie Fang, mother of rescued boy reported by the Miami Herald.

SURVIVORS RECOUNT HARROWING ESCAPE FROM COLLAPSED CONDO
1 p.m.: Alfredo and Marian Lopez were sound asleep around 1:30 a.m. Thursday when they heard the first boom, like a crash of thunder from a Florida squall. Only louder.

“I woke up and thought we’re just having a bad thunderstorm,” Alfredo, 61, later told the Miami Herald. The noise jolted him from sleep in his sixth-floor apartment at the northwest corner of Champlain Towers South in Surfside.

So did Bruno Treptow, 62, who was sleeping in his unit exactly two floors above, in the same corner of the 40-year-old, 12-story condo tower. (read more on above link)

If you survived, or still searching for one of the 159 still missing, now is the time to get help.

If you think you need to stay strong for everyone else, you are partially correct. The only way to do that is to open up and ask for help now, so that you can be a strong example of what to do. If you are thinking that you need to hold in your emotions, then they will begin to take over until they have so much power over you, that PTSD will most likely take hold too.

Right now you can break the chain from trauma to suffering a life altering change. Surviving a traumatic event like this was hard enough. Don't make it harder than it should be.

Chaplains and crisis intervention teams have already been deployed. Turn to them. Turn to each other and lean on one another. Give and receive strength together.

Not Alone

RED

Slowly fading away

You're lost and so afraid

Where is the hope in a world so cold?

Looking for a distant light

Someone who can save a life

Living in fear that no one will hear your cry

(Can you save me now?)

I am with you

I will carry you through it all

I won't leave you, I will catch you

When you feel like letting go

'Cause you're not, you're not alone

Your heart is full of broken dreams

Just a fading memory

And everything's gone but the pain carries on

Lost in the rain again

When will it ever end?

The arms of relief seem so out of reach

But I, I am here

I am with you

I will carry you through it all

I won't leave you, I will catch you

When you feel like letting go

'Cause you're not, you're not alone

And I will be your hope when you feel like it's over

And I will pick you up when your whole world shatters

And when you're finally in my arms

You'll look up and see, love has a face

I am with you

I will carry you through it all

I won't leave you, I will catch you

When you feel like letting go

'Cause you're not, you're not alone

And I will be your hope (you're not alone)

And I will pick you up

And I will be your hope

And I will be your hope

Slowly fading away

You're lost and so afraid

Where is the hope in a world so cold?

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Jasen Rauch / Mark L Holman / Robert Douglas Iii Graves

Not Alone lyrics © Emi Blackwood Music Inc., Logansong Music

Wednesday night the people living in the Champlain Towers, Surfside Florida, went to sleep with plans for the next day. Early Thursday morning, that was all destroyed. As of Friday morning, there were 4 dead and 159 remain missing.

Now is the time to reach out for help because the days will be harder for a while. Chaplains have been deployed there and they are trained to help you.

If you are thinking you need to be strong to help others, then let that motivate you to be an example by asking for help because you need it. That will allow them to feel free to ask for it too. #BreakTheSilence

Why is focusing on the spiritual needs of people with PTSD is important?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 24, 2021

There seems to be a lot of confusion out there about what faith is in America is now. This shows in the drop of people attending buildings of worship and the rise in suicides.

Why is focusing on the spiritual needs of people with PTSD is important? PTSD hits the emotional part of our brains. That is where our souls live.

Considering how many groups popped up all over the country because of the report from the Department of Veterans Affairs about veterans committing suicide, the fact that more Americans commit suicide without much attention at all.

A lot of them had PTSD but did not find the hope and help they needed to heal. We know this by all the reports of military, veterans and first responders with PTSD committing suicide. What we are not reminded of as often, is how many civilians give up too.

Suicide is a Leading Cause of Death in the United States
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) WISQARS Leading Causes of Death Reports, in 2019:

Suicide was the tenth leading cause of death overall in the United States, claiming the lives of over 47,500 people.
Suicide was the second leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 10 and 34, and the fourth leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 35 and 44.
There were nearly two and a half times as many suicides (47,511) in the United States as there were homicides (19,141).

That was the last report they have listed. Right now no one is sure how many with all the turmoil this country has gone through over the last couple of years, but one thing is clear, there is only one reason people commit suicide. They lost hope that life could get better. Losing the ability to believe in that, even just for a little while, takes away hope.

If they cannot find hope that the next day can be better, and no one gives it to them, it is a battle they lose. This is why suicide awareness does not work. It robs them of hope, putting a spotlight on all those who gave up on their own lives...and everyone else.

Less than half of Americans attend worship service now according to Gallop

People leave the building when they do not find what they need inside of it. Usually there are many reasons but the basic one is, they had a problem big enough they felt drained instead of filled as they walked out the door.

People also confuse the building with God Himself. They tend to believe that God wants nothing to do with them, or turned away from them, and they abandon that relationship entirely. Once that link to what they believe in has been severed, a piece of them is empty.

If this has been the case for you, then please know that you do not have to be in a building, or a group, or pledge anything to anyone for the privilege of praying. You can talk to God wherever you are, wearing whatever you are wearing and speak in your own words.

If you doubt this, remember, Jesus prayed outside most of the time. When He delivered the Sermon On The Mount, it was not in a building. It was on top of a hill.

Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount

5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2 and he began to teach them.
The Beatitudes
He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

If you read the rest of it, then you'll see how much else we get wrong all the time. Notice the difference between what He was preaching when the leaders of the Hebrew people were were saying something totally different.

Don't blame God for what people do. Don't think He turned away from you, just because some people made you feel as if you didn't belong with them.

Today's feature video is Kris Kristofferson, Why Me.

Kris Kristofferson Biography

He believed that songwriting is a spiritual communion of mind, body, and soul, and he believed that William Blake was correct in asserting that anyone divinely ordered for spiritual communion but buries his talent will be pursued by sorrow and desperation through life and by shame and confusion for eternity.

“(Blake) is telling you that you’ll be miserable if you don’t do what you’re supposed to do,” Kristofferson said in the Ken Burns’ documentary Country Music.

Kristofferson’s devotion to spiritual communion brought much in the way of sorrow, desperation, and misery, but it led to triumph.

Maybe it is time to fill yourself back up with hope by discovering what you can still hope for?

Years ago, I did a video because a lot of veterans thought that they were being punished by God because of PTSD. It is called PTSD Is Not God's Judgment. I have no idea why it is age restricted but that is the link to it.

I hope it helps. That is the video today because I don't think I can explain it any better today than I did in that video.

Why Me

Kris Kristofferson

Why me Lord, what have I ever done

To deserve even one

Of the pleasures I've known

Tell me Lord, what did I ever do

That was worth loving you

Or the kindness you've shown.

Lord help me Jesus, I've wasted it so

Help me Jesus I know what I am

Now that I know that I've need you so

Help me Jesus, my soul's in your hand.

Tell me Lord, if you think there's a way

I can try to repay

All I've taken from you

Maybe Lord, I can show someone else

What I've been through myself

On my way back to you.

Lord help me Jesus, I've wasted it so

Help me Jesus I know what I am

Now that I know that I've need you so

Help me Jesus, my soul's in your hand.

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Kris Kristofferson

Why Me lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

 

Bonus from A Star Is Born

why I always do the videos from my garage

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 23, 2021

(This is for the new PTSD Patrol site to explain things the new readers may not know. If you already know all this, then please just enjoy The Beatles video)

My name is Kathie Costos. For decades I was known as Namguardianangel. I couldn't afford the website anymore, so I had to let it go. In 2007 I started Wounded Times and in 2017 PTSD Patrol began as a way to change the conversation from doom and gloom to hope and healing.

You may wonder why I always do the videos from my garage. That is because that is where my vehicle rests. We know so much more about the vehicles we drive, than the one we live in. This is a way to explain it.

(Today's video is a long one to explain it to people who discover this on the new site. You may learn something too.)

The only thing I didn't cover in the video was why I use music. It changes our moods. It puts words to what we feel but cannot communicate. The other reason is, it reminds us that other people felt the same way too or they wouldn't have been able to write the lyrics. Another reason is, I never drive without the radio on!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

HELP

The Beatles

(Help!) I need somebody

(Help!) Not just anybody

(Help!) You know I need someone

(Help!)

When I was younger so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured

Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways

My independence seems to vanish in the haze

But every now and then I feel so insecure

I know that I just need you like I've never done before

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

When I was younger, so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured

Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

Help me? Help me? Ooh

Genius.com

the oldest pandemic this nation has ever seen

Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
June 22, 2021

Last year I went to the New Hampshire veterans cemetery for the first time on Memorial Day. As I walked around, I thought about all the veterans in my family who passed away, as well as the two veterans I was walking with. My husband and his best friend are both Vietnam veterans.

When I came upon this memorial, I had to catch a couple of tears falling. The empty place where the service member is saluting, got to me.

It was around that time when I was debating about giving up working with veterans. No matter how hard I tried, or how much I knew, it seemed as if I was fighting everyone I knew in the veteran community. Most of them were latched onto the slogan of "22 a day" and wouldn't let go of the notion that suicide awareness was a good thing to do. How could they believe that letting suicidal veterans hear about others giving up would offer them anything but more despair?

It was too late to change their minds and I had been doing this work for too long to be able to deal with the deadly results of ignorance. My heart was being ripped out every time I read another report of another suicide.

No one wanted to hear what needed to be done, anymore than they wanted to hear about the decades of failures to address the oldest pandemic this nation has ever seen...suicides carried out by those who valued the lives of others so much so, they were willing to die to save them.

I got into all of this in 1982 and focused on Vietnam veterans with PTSD, but the truth is, they had only become the latest generation to join the others going back to when this nation began. What I didn't know back then was there would be more wars.

It felt as if I was fighting this one all alone as soon as people started to read news reports in 2012. Soon after that, the awareness groups started popping up and eroding the ability for veterans to find people like me.

And now, maybe you'll understand why I gave up on what I had dedicated my life to almost 4 decades ago.

read more here

While all the "awareness" people were talking about, a number when they didn't even understand the report it came from, I was talking about changing the conversation. This is from an interview I did in 2012.

That was what they needed to hear, but I guess I stopped being good enough to get them to hear me. 

I fought them until last year and then I opened this up to anyone with PTSD. If you are in the military, a veteran, or a member of any of the responder positions, this work is for you too. No matter what caused PTSD in you, you are still only human like the rest of us.

Today the featured video is Neil Diamond, He Ain't Heavy because helping people with PTSD heal should not be a burden for any of us.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother

Neil Diamond

The road is long with many awaiting turns

That lead us to who knows where,

Who knows where

But I'm strong,

Strong enough to carry him

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

So long we go

His welfare is my concern

No burden is he to bare, we'll get there

For I know

He would not encumber me

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

If Im laden at all,

I I am laden with sadness that

Everyone's heart isn't filled with the gladness

I am alone for one and other

It's so long long road

From which there is no return

While we're on the way to live why not share

And the load doesn't weigh me down at all

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

He's my brother

He ain't heavy

He's my brother

He's my brother

He ain't heavy

He's my brother

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: B. Russell / B. Scott

He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother lyrics © Music Sales Corporation, Music Sales Corp. 

Thank you for your patience

 

My new site for PTSD Patrol is up and running. Still some tweaking to do, but it is almost where I want it to be.

New email is Kathie@ptsdpatrol.com

While working on the new site, I thought about starting a new blog but decided this one has already been established, so it will remain open.  I should begin to start posting again in a day or so.

Thank you for your patience.

I won't give up if you don't give up

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 20, 2021

Something happened to my site and I am building a new PTSDPatrol.com site. I won't be posting for a few days here while I build the site. It will take some time because I am rusty (and old)

This is what the new site will look like. The last thing I needed was to spend more money on what I do for free! I believe it is worth it after almost 4 decades of making this my life's mission. 

If this work helps you, and you want to help, I have a Facebook fundraiser to help me make back some of the money I just spent. I can't help anyone else if they cannot find me.

Check back in a few days for the notice that PTSD Patrol is up and running. 

Calling All Angels

Train 

I need a sign to let me know you're here

All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere

I need to know that things are gonna look up

'Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

When there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head

When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

And I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I won't give up if you don't give up

I need a sign to let me know you're here

'Cause my TV set just keeps it all from being clear

I want a reason for the way things have to be

I need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

When children have to play inside so they don't disappear

While private eyes solve marriage lies 'cause we don't talk for years

And football teams are kissing Queens and losing sight of having dreams

In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours

And I'm calling all angels

And I'm calling all you angels

And I'm (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

And I'm (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Calling all you angels (I won't give up if you don't give up)

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: James Stafford / Scott Underwood / Pat Monahan / Charles Colin

Calling All Angels lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

I went from zero, to my own hero

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 16, 2021

If someone you know needs help, do you help them? If someone you know needs to talk, do you listen? Why don't you when the person you know better than anyone else, needs that from you? That would be YOU and the best way to help yourself is to ask for help from someone else, the same way you'd help them.

How many times do you need to be reminded of that? If you are the type of person who always rushed to help someone, your emotions paid a price for that. What if you did it multiple times? Did you take care of yourself afterwards or did you just decide to "get over it" and forget about it? Not dealing with it and addressing what you needed to give yourself in return, did not help you recover what you gave away. All it did was zap away more of your strength. If you kept giving more and more of yourself away, it only makes sense that you get to a point where your strength is gone.

With nothing left to give, it is depressing because you still want to help but have nothing to give away anymore. Time to fill yourself up so you can be able to do what you love to do....be a hero to yourself and then you can.

Today the featured video is Katy Perry ROAR!

If you made your living helping others, sooner or later, you run empty. Is it your pride, ego, or arrogance that is getting in your way? Thinking you shouldn't ask for help somehow made sense to you? Seriously? What kind of a message does that send when you are telling everyone else to ask for help and you'll be there if you are never willing to ask for it for yourself?

When you have nothing left to give and cannot help anyone, it is a depressing hell you trapped yourself in. Helping others is a part of you and if you cannot do it, then you are probably making people around you miserable too because they are wondering why you won't help them.

Isn't it time you asked and then set a better example? Then you can tell them to ask for help because you did. Tell them that there is nothing to be ashamed of, because you were not ashamed to ask for help when you needed it. You can also explain to them what it was like when you went from feeling like a zero to hero again.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Roar

Katy Perry

I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath

Scared to rock the boat and make a mess

So I sat quietly, agreed politely

I guess that I forgot I had a choice

I let you push me past the breaking point

I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

You held me down, but I got up (hey)

Already brushing off the dust

You hear my voice, you hear that sound

Like thunder, gonna shake the ground

You held me down, but I got up (hey)

Get ready 'cause I've had enough

I see it all, I see it now

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter

Dancing through the fire

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Louder, louder than a lion

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You're gonna hear me roar

Now I'm floatin' like a butterfly

Stinging like a bee, I earned my stripes

I went from zero, to my own hero

You held me down, but I got up (hey)

Already brushing off the dust

You hear my voice, you hear that sound

Like thunder, gonna shake the ground

You held me down, but I got up (hey)

Get ready 'cause I've had enough

I see it all, I see it now

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter

Dancing through the fire

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Louder, louder than a lion

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You're gonna hear me roar

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (you'll hear me roar)

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You're gonna hear me roar

Roar, roar, roar, roar, roar

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter

Dancing through the fire

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Louder, louder than a lion

'Cause I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (yeah)

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You're gonna hear me roar

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (you'll hear me roar)

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

You're gonna hear me roar

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Lukasz Gottwald / Max Martin / Bonnie Leigh McKee / Katy Perry / Henry Walter

Roar lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Concord Music Publishing LLC 

"Can you imagine how I feel today?"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 15, 2021

"Can you imagine how I feel today?" is a question no one would have to ask if they talked...and someone listened. No relationship can last if they do not talk to each other about a hell of a lot more than dinner or who does what chores.

How many times have you been out to eat and look around, seeing most of the people looking at their cell phones instead of talking to the people they are with? The social media people are getting all their attention but not the person they are with. It is really bad when young parents are on their cellphones while their young child is throwing french fries at other tables. (Yes I saw that a time or two.)

A lot of relationships end with just regular problems. Add PTSD to the trouble list along with refusing to talk about what is going on and you end up causing a lot of imagination overload for your partner. They know you're hiding something, but since you won't tell them, they start assuming it has something to do with them.

If you are pushing them away at the same time you are not talking, which happens a lot, then you may get it sooner than you think when you push them too far away...and they walk away,

Can you imagine how they feel today? Today the featured video is Cliff Richard, We Don't Talk Anymore. 

There must have been a time when you did talk and actually acted like you wanted to spend time with them, not with distractions. There must have been a time when you actually looked into their eyes when they talked to you as if they deserved your attention. Above all, there must have been a time when you trusted them enough to share what was on your mind.

How about you try to do all that again before they walk away from you?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

We Don't Talk Anymore (2001 Remaster)

Cliff Richard

Used to think that life was sweet

Used to think we were so complete

I can't believe you'd throw it away

Used to feel we had it made

Used to feel we could sail away

Can you imagine how I feel today?

Well, it seems a long time ago

You were the lonely one

Now it comes to letting go

You are the only one

Do you know what you've done?

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore

It's so funny, why we don't talk anymore

But I ain't losing sleep and I ain't counting sheep

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore

Oh, we don't talk, ooh

Well, it really doesn't matter to me

I guess your leaving was meant to be

It's down to you now, you wanna be free

Well, I hope you know which way to go

You're on your own again

Don't come crying to me when you're the lonely one

Remember what you've done

Oh, it's so funny how we don't talk anymore

It's so funny, why we don't talk anymore

But I ain't losing sleep and I ain't counting sheep

No, no, no

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore, anymore

Oh, we don't talk anymore

Ooh, we don't talk anymore

But I ain't, no, losing sleep

No, I ain't counting sheep

No, no, no, no

It's so funny how we don't talk anymore, anymore

Oh, we don't talk, oh, we don't talk

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: A Tarney

We Don't Talk Anymore (2001 Remaster) lyrics © Sony/atv Music Publishing (uk) Limited 

When you feel your life's too hard

PTSD Patrol

Kathie Costos

June 14, 2021

I was searching for a video on the need to talk when I heard Stevie Wonder, Have A Talk With God. The line, "Never communicating with the One who lives within," really got me. I was thinking about all the times someone told me they have a hard time asking for help. I'm not sure if they are ashamed they need it, or ashamed of not having anyone to ask for it.

In my case, I have no problem asking for help but no one I know can help me with what I need help with, so I talk to God. Who am I kidding? Pretty much I talk to Him about everything! He has been in my life all my life and the only one I have trusted all my life. It is hard to not trust Him considering He already knows everything about me. Sometimes I trust Him more than I trust myself.

He won't blab to someone else about what you told Him in secret. He won't laugh at you. He will comfort you. He will forgive you if that is what you need or guide you if you are lost and don't know what to do, but most of all, He will help you forgive others and find peace with letting go of things you have no control over.

If you have PTSD, the cause of it was out of your control. You need to let go of the "would" "could" and "should" thoughts filling your brain with self blame. You are haunted by the past and need to peace to move forward without being stuck looking in the rearview mirror.

The other thing is, if you ask to be shown the way toward healing, He will guide you there. Consider the directions from the Heavenly GPS, God Plain and Simple!

Stay away from anyone who tells you something like, "God only gives us what we can handle," because that giving you the thought that He did it to you. They actually expect you to pray to Him after they just told you He did it on purpose? God will give you what you need to get through it!

Think about it this way, others went through things that you are going through and their hearts were tugged to help others get through their own struggles, knowing they are not alone. Who do you think tugged their hearts? He did and they were willing to listen. Are you willing to ask?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Have a Talk With God

Stevie Wonder

There are people who have let the problems of today

Lead them to conclude that for them life is not the way

But every problem has an answer, and if yours you cannot find

You should talk it over to Him

He'll give you peace of mind

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Many of us feel we walk alone without a friend

Never communicating with the One who lives within

Forgetting all about the One who never, ever lets you down

And you can talk to Him anytime, He's always around

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Well, He's the only free psychiatrist

That's known throughout the world

For solving the problems of all men

Women, little boys, and girls

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

When your load's too much to bear

Just go talk to God, He cares

(I know He does)

When you feel your life's too hard

Just go have a talk with God

Thank you

Thank you very much

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Wonder Stevie / Hardaway Calvin

Have a Talk With God lyrics © Jobete Music Co., Inc.

when we are no longer remembered

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 13,2021

Everyone will die one day. Famous people become part of history. For most people, someone will remember them, for as long as they live, but a day will come, when we are no longer remembered.

Conversely, to blot out a person’s name was to destroy that individual for all eternity, to eliminate him from the historical record.
Death Ancient Egypt

The thing is, what you do here on earth, never dies. Your name may be forgotten, but every life you touch, passes that on to others. They touch more lives and it spreads far beyond what you can see, beyond people you know, far more than you realize and much longer than you breathe.

Today's featured video is Casting Crowns, Scars In Heaven.

Matthew McConaughey Reads 1 Corinthians 12 12 27

We are all part of one body and each part of the "body" has a job to do, while we live. When someone we love dies, according to the Bible, there is no pain, sadness, or any bad memories. They will take all the good with them and it will live on. All the love they receive, joy, happiness and wonderful memories live on. There are no scars in Heaven. Maybe our job, instead of wanting to be remembered, is to have what we do remembered long after we are gone?

When we do something for someone else, it changes them. When you have PTSD, most of the time, it was caused by someone else. You know what that pain is like and how it changed you. Hopefully by now, you also know what it is like to have those scars healed because someone did something for you. They showed you that you do matter, and helped you heal the scars.

You can turn around and pass that on for them and they will change the other people in their lives by living a happier life. That gets passed on and on and on, long after they are gone too, but the number of lives you changed will never stop being changed.

Look at what happened because people decided to spread the messages of love that Jesus delivered. The 12 Disciples names are written in the Bible but there were 72 others also sent. No one knows their names but they had spread the messages to many more than the 12 did. What they delivered spread across the world and to generations of the generation they preached to. What you do when you live spreads too.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Scars in Heaven

Casting Crowns

If I had only known the last time

Would be the last time

I would have put off all the things I had to do

I would have stayed a little longer

Held on a little tighter

Now what I'd give for one more day with you

'Cause there's a wound here in my heart

Where something's missing

And they tell me that it's gonna heal with time

But I know you're in a place

Where all your wounds have been erased

And knowing yours are healed is healing mine

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven

Are on the Hands that hold you now

I know the road you walked was anything but easy

You picked up your share of scars along the way

Oh, but now you're standing in the sun

You've fought your fight and your race is run

The pain is all a million miles away

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven, yeah

Are on the Hands that hold you now

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

Hallelujah

For the Hands that hold you now

There's not a day goes by that I don't see you

You live on in all the better parts of me

Until I'm standing with you in the sun

I'll fight this fight and this race I'll run

Until I finally see what you can see, oh-oh

The only scars in Heaven

They won't belong to me and you

There'll be no such thing as broken

And all the old will be made new

And the thought that makes me smile now

Even as the tears fall down

Is that the only scars in Heaven

Are on the Hands that hold you now

Source: Musixmatch 

Love helped Orlando heal after Pulse stopped

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 12, 2021

Five years ago, a man so filled with hate, decided to murder 49 people and wound 53 more. He did not know them. He did not know who they were, what they did or anything other than the fact he hated them so much, he decided to slaughter them.

The survivors acted out of love for the people they were with and for total strangers. They helped one and other escape to a place where they could hide, if they could not get out of the building. Some of those killed, died saving someone else.

People who were not there, decided to respond out of love to do what they could to help. They rushed with their cars and trucks to take the wounded to hospitals. Police Officers and SWAT teams showed up, putting their own lives in danger to stop the man from killing more.

When it was over, when the sun came up, officers were walking around where the dead still laid on the floor with their cell phone ringing. The officers would be forever haunted by the sounds of someone trying to reach someone they loved to see if they were still alive...or not.

People in the area, joined together to donate blood. Thousands of people did whatever they could to help, not knowing if they were risking their own lives, because no one knew if there would be more people so filled with hate, they were ready to kill too. Strangers showed up to give people in line food and something to drink as they stood in the heat patiently waiting their turn to do whatever they could.

Money came in from all over the world to help the families bury the people they loved and to help the survivors with their medical expenses, lost wages and every other price they paid because they were targetted by hatred.

Crisis Intervention teams showed up for the families of those who died, for the survivors and for the responders. Mental Health professionals lined up to provide free trauma care.

Love won that day, as it usually does. When one person, or a few, decide to act out of hate, millions respond with love.

Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount

5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him,

2 and he began to teach them.
The Beatitudes

He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

That is a list of people who are blessed. None of it is easy but all of it is based on love.

Salt and Light
13 “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.
15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.
16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

When people pretend they are doing something in the Name of God, or in the Name of Jesus, this is how you know if they are telling the truth or not.

Love for Enemies
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’
44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?
47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

This can be especially hard, but consider what Jesus was facing, knowing He would be put to death for the sake of those He Loved, and yet He preached all about Love. It is more powerful than anything else there is.

Today the featured video has no lyrics. It only has names of the people murdered 5 years ago at the Pulse Nightclub. One man decided to murder them, but thousands responded with love!

Five First Responders to the Pulse Massacre. One Diagnosis: PTSD.

by Abe Aboraya, WMFE June 11, 2018

Pulse was one of the nation’s largest mass shootings, where 49 people died and at least 53 others were wounded. The invisible injuries to first responders represent another toll of the catastrophe.

For these five first responders — and many others — June 12 was the first day of their new lives, one in which they would confront post-traumatic stress disorder. Even though most had responded to gruesome scenes of murder, suicide and car accidents, that didn’t prepare them for the psychological injury of PTSD. Going forward, they would relive that day in flashbacks and nightmares, see danger behind every closed door, and become irritable and impatient with spouses and coworkers.

“There are just some events that are so horrific that no human being should be able to just process that and put it away,” said Deborah Beidel, a University of Central Florida professor who runs a clinic called UCF Restores that treats first responders with PTSD. read more here

And that is what happens when people who risk their lives to respond to what hatred does. But love helps them heal too!
I interviewd Dr. Beidel a few years ago.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from PTSD

Don't miss "the miracle of the moment"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 11, 2021

Why is it that we want to change what has already been done, unsay what has already been said and change the path we chose to take, only to discover it was a huge mistake? We can't change a damn thing that happened up do a second ago. Still none of us have to settle for what came from all we got wrong because we can change this second onward. That is the "miracle of the moment. Today's featured video is Steven Curtis Chapman, This Moment.

Yes, you can change and you have the power to do it. Do you feel bad about something you said? Then apologize and say something better. Give the person you said it to a chance to accept your apology but, understand that it has already been said. It may take time to rebuild whatever relationship you had with them. At the very least, if they do not forgive you, you opened the door to begin to forgive yourself for just being a human who was wrong.

Sure it sucks to be wrong but it sucks more to stay wrong. Change now by learning from your past because that is all it is good for.

Part of having PTSD is being on guard. Hearing more than someone actually said, and taking it as a personal attack against you, or overblowing everything, causes a rift that could destroy a relationship. When you understand that, then you can think about how you react in the furture, but it does not change what has already been done. Only you can do that by making new memories for them, and yourself to overpower the bad memories you have. You can start this moment to make a miracle for your future.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

This Moment

Steven Curtis Chapman

It's time for letting go

All of our if only's

'Cause we don't have a time machine

And even if we did

Would we really want to use it

Would we really want to go change everything

'Cause we are who and where

And what we are for now

And this is the only moment

We can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

There's only one who knows

What's really out there waiting

In all the moments yet to be

And all we need to know

Is he's out there waiting

To Him the future's history

And He has given us

A treasure called right now

And this is the only moment

We can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

And if it brings you tears

Then taste them as they fall

And let them soften your heart

And if it brings you laughter

Then throw your head back

And let it go, let it go, yeah

You gotta let it go

And listen to your heartbeat, yeah

Breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

Breathe it in and breathe it out

And listen to your heartbeat

There's a wonder in the here and now

It's right there in front of you

I don't want you to miss the miracle of the moment

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Matthew Bronleewe / Steven Curtis Chapman

Miracle of the Moment lyrics © BMG Rights Management 

Wish them well and then tell them to go to hell

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 10, 2021

Yesterday I had some personal things to do. To tell the truth, I needed a mental health day too. I am glad I did. I was looking for music to use today when I came across Disturbed Stronger On Your Own. As I listened to it, I started to think how I am stronger, and happier on my own.

When I lived in Florida, I was involved with a lot of veterans groups. I really cared about them, but there was something that was in the way of getting close to them. Politics! I listened to them say how much they hated things I believed, without them knowing what I thought. Some people on the other side, were OK and didn't seem to put it first above all else and we stayed friends. I kept my mouth shut with the others as they went on and on about their views, anger, bitterness and hatred. I still cared about them but it hurt.

I kept thinking that if they knew what I thought, they'd hate me too. I was right. When I moved to New Hampshire, it was lonely. We had a few friends and our daughter was here, we were also closer to other family members. Then the pandemic hit and things got shut down. It got even lonelier.

I got stronger! I looked back at how I hid what I thought as if I had anything to be ashamed of, when I didn't. 

This has gone way beyond simple political differences. I used to really enjoy a good debate but it did not cause as much hatred as it has the last ten years or so. Now it is as if we are so filled with it, nothing else matters to far too many.

If you have PTSD and you are dealing with this political BS, walk away. We've all heard crap over the years, especially about what people want to believe. There were decades when people thought PTSD was not real and if you are a veteran, you probably heard someone say that you were only out for a free ride, a government paycheck and it was all BS. I'd love to hear one of them say that to a civilian with PTSD, especially when the percentage of people denying it is still higher than those who admit it. The stigma and crappy attitude is alive and well because facts are still damned and people like to hear what they already believe.

If you are surrounded by people who do not think the way you do, then walk away. Listening to them will rob you of healing and get in the way. You should not have to change what you believe to fit in with someone who has shown you they already hate you, even though they never heard it from you.

It is a hinderance to your recovery. Wish them well and then tell them to go to hell. It is better to be on your own until you find others who do think like you, believe what you do, or, at least accept you as you are. 

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Stronger on Your Own

Disturbed

Everybody has a story to tell

Listen closely now and you can hear mine as well

I was addicted to breaking my heart

I couldn't get enough of feeling it torn apart

So conflicted, in feeling the pain

I say I've had enough but still want it all again

I won't deny

I tried to hide it

But it was killing me inside

And now I

Feel un-whole

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your

Stronger on your own

I've created my own personal hell

Come inside with me and you can be mine as well

This affliction will blacken your heart

I keep believing as it's tearing my soul apart

Self-destruction is the name of the game

I say I've had enough but still want it all again

I won't deny

I tried to hide it

But now it's killing me inside

And now I

Feel so cold

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your own

And when you're able to decide

Then you don't want this anymore

You'll be the one to turn the tide

For you are stronger on your

Stronger on your

Stronger on your own

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

Leave it alone

Bury it, bury it

Leave it alone

Bury the dead

So if you're able to survive

And still you find yourself alone

You will begin to realize

That you are stronger on your own

And when you're able to decide

Then you don't want this anymore

You'll be the one to turn the tide

For you are stronger on your

Stronger on your

Stronger on your own

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Dan Donegan / David Draiman / Kevin Churko / Mike Wengren

Stronger on Your Own lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

why should you join a support group

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
June 8, 2021

Today I posted about how Wounded Times (my other site) reached over 5 million page views. I wrote that All that work was worth it because it was but for a long time, I didn't feel that way. I was getting less and less comments, hardly no feedback, and I started to think that it just didn't matter anymore. It hurt.

Now I know better but believe it or not, that is one of the reasons why you should join a support group. I know it sounds like a strange leap, but hear me out.

It was lonely and it got harder to find a reason to keep doing something that was healing for me. Knowing I was making a difference, was like a gift I gave myself. When you have PTSD and are doing the work alone, it is great but there comes a time when you need the positive feedback from others. Face it! We all have an ego. Feed your ego!

Think about it this way. If you were really overweight and put in a lot of work to lose it, but moved to a new town where no one knew you, they wouldn't know what you did or how hard you worked at it. Yet, if you went back to where people knew you, they would let you know how proud they were of you, congratulate you on it, and yes, feed your ego. It is like a gift you give yourself.

Being in a support group, gives you that positive feedback, support and inspires you to keep doing the work of healing. When you are healed, you can give that to others too, because you know what it was like when you did it, just as much as you remember what it was like to do it alone. That is a gift you give to others, but also, a gift you give to yourself.

On a personal note, I want to thank the people who stuck with me on Wounded Times, even if I don't know who you are. I am also grateful for the people passing on the work for PTSD Patrol. Reaching over 100,000 page views was because of you being willing to do that.
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Make Your Own Kind of Music

The Mamas and the Papas

Nobody can tell you

There's only one song worth singing

They may try and sell you

Cause it hangs them up

To see someone like you

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You're gonna be nowhere

The loneliest kind of lonely

It may be rough going

Just to do your thing is the hardest thing to do

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

So if you cannot take my hand

And if you must be going, I will understand

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own kind of song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

You gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own kind of song

Make your own kind of music

Even if nobody else sings along

No no no no

Even if nobody else sings along

If nobody else sings along

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Barry Mann / Cynthia Weil

Make Your Own Kind of Music lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC