Your career is to help others...but not yourself?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 7, 2021

We haven't had a video for responders for a while and considering this is Mental Health Month, it is a good time to do it. Put everything you think about PTSD for a few minutes. Your job is to help people. Why wouldn't you want to ask for help for yourself? It makes no sense at all.

Today the featured video is Little River Band, Help Is On Its Way. Those five words give hope that whatever horrible thing you are going through, will stop being horrible.

Think about the people you rush to help. They survived something that could have killed them and many times, they need help to stay alive. Hearing help is on the way, lets them know it is about to get better. They can end up with PTSD from the event you had to respond to. It only takes that one time too many, and sometimes it is just one time that did it, but their lives change. For me, I survived over 10 of them. Most of the time, responders had to come and help me. If you can understand what the event could do to us, then why can't you understand what all the ones you were involved with could do to you?

Your career is to help others...but not yourself? Why? Are you ashamed of being human and surviving all those events? I have to tell you that after all these years of working with people with PTSD, I am not ashamed of any of them. I am not ashamed of what they turned around and did with their lives after they received help. I am not ashamed of my husband. I am not even ashamed of myself, after finally discovering that what I went through was PTSD too, just a different form of it. Why would you be ashamed of needing help when helping is your job?

Don't you think the people you work with would risk their lives to save you, the same way you'd risk your life for their sake? Then how could you doubt they would listen to you when you need to talk? On the flip side, if you don't have PTSD but someone you work with may, why aren't you finding out all you can about PTSD so you can help them? Any idea how they will feel when they know that help is on the way for them and the horrible times will get better? 

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Help Is on Its Way

Little River Band

Why are you in so such hurry?

Is it really worth the worry?

Look around, then slow down

What's it like inside the bubble?

Does your head ever give you trouble?

It's no sin, trade it in

Hang on, help is on its way

I'll be there as fast as I can

"Hang on", a tiny voice did say

From somewhere deep inside the inner man

Are you always in confusion?

Surrounded by illusion?

Sort it out, you'll make out

Seem to make a good beginning

Someone else ends up winning

Don't seem fair, don't you care?

Hang on, help is on its way

I'll be there as fast as I can

"Hang on", a tiny voice did say

From somewhere deep inside the inner man

Don't you forget who'll take care of you

It don't matter what you do

Form a duet, let him sing melody

You'll provide the harmony

Why are you in so such hurry?

Is it really worth the worry?

Look around, then slow down

What's it like inside the bubble?

Does your head ever give you trouble?

It's no sin, trade it in

Hang on, help is on its way

I'll be there as fast as I can

"Hang on", a tiny voice did say

From somewhere deep inside the inner man

Hang on, help is on its way

I'll be there as fast as I can

"Hang on", a tiny voice did say

From somewhere deep inside the inner man

Help is on its way

Help is on its way

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Glenn Barrie Shorrock

Help Is on Its Way lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc 

What is your reason to fight?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 5, 2021

What is your reason to fight for something? Are you willing to fight for a cause you believe in? How much do you believe in it? Do you give it all of your free time or do you just do it once in a while? Are you invested in the cause enough to learn everything you can about it? Does that include what others have done, what they did that worked along with what didn't work they knew enough to drop?

The thing is, when you have a reason to fight for something, then you do give it everything you have. All the time you have to spare is committed to it. How about you decide to be committed to fighting for yourself? Aren't you worth fighting for?

There are PTSD advocates fighting for other people to get help, but they never fought for themselves. It isn't that they don't care about other people. It is more about them being the type of person everyone goes to for help, that prevents them from asking for it from themselves. It is almost as if they admit they need help, it will make them look weaker in the eyes of everyone else.

There are PTSD advocates who are fighting, not just because they care, but because they also had the same pain in their lives. The best advocates are those who have all that in their lives, but also know what it is like to need help, ask for it, and receive it. Then they can honestly share their lives with those they are trying to help. They are an example of what is possible to those who feel as lost as they did before.

I am in that category. The reason why people like me do it is because we remember what life was like when we were just suffering. We remember what it was like when we were healing and someone helped us do it. The biggest blessing comes is when we healed and helped others get through the hell so they could be happier. Watching them pass on that healing, being an example of not being afraid to ask for help, is a gift beyond words. We know it does not stop with them, but moves on from them and spreads out. We will never know how many lives changed because we did. I hope those who helped me so long ago know that too because even I do not know how many lives changed because they helped me first!

This is why the featured video today is Disturbed, A Reason To Fight.

Don't let it take your soul

Look at me take control

When knowing to fight this war

This is nothing worth dying for

Are you ready to begin?

Are you ready to begin? Do you finally believe you are worth fighting for too? Then become the example of what you want others to do by doing it for yourself.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

A Reason to Fight

Disturbed

The image in your eyes

Reflecting the pain that has taken you

I hear it in your voice, so ridden with shame

From what's hailing you

I won't give up so don't give in

You've fallen down but you can rise again

So don't give up

When the demon that's inside you is ready to begin

And it feels like it's a battle that you will never win

When you're aching for the fire and begging for your sin

When there's nothing left inside, there's still a reason to fight

Lost in your world of lies

I find it so hard to believe in you

Can it be real this time?

Or just a part of this game that we're playing through

I won't give up so don't give in

You've fallen down but you will rise again

I won't give up

When the demon that's inside you is ready to begin

And it feels like it's a battle that you will never win

When you're aching for the fire and begging for your sin

When there's nothing left inside, there's still a reason to fight

Don't let it take your soul

Look at me take control

When knowing to fight this war

This is nothing worth dying for

Are you ready to begin?

This is a battle that we are gonna win

When you're aching for the fire and begging for your sin

When there's nothing left inside, there's still a reason

When the demon that's inside you is ready to begin

And it feels like it's a battle that you will never win

When you're aching for the fire and begging for your sin

When there's nothing left inside, there's still a reason to fight

I'll be your reason to fight

Give you a reason to fight

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Dan J Donegan / David Michael Draiman / Kevin Gregory Churko / Michael Wengren

A Reason to Fight lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.

Yes, I have faith in you that you will ask for help because you have invested too much of your heart in getting others to do it. #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
Bonus video from Disturbed If I Ever Lose My Faith

This is Mental Health Awareness Month. When it comes to PTSD, it was because Vietnam veterans fought for all the reseach and funding on what trauma does. If you are a veteran...consider what you have to fight for, after you fought for those you served with.

We seem to have a habit of forgetting even Jesus needed suppor

Today is Eastern Orthodox Easter. I am spending it with my family and there will not be a video for today. I was going through some older posts and came across this from 2017. It was posted on my older site, but still applies to today.

This time, you have to start with saving your own life
Combat PTSD Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
April 15, 2017

Tomorrow is Easter for Christians around the world. The day Jesus defeated death after everyone thought He had failed to deliver on the promises He made. Think about that for a second. Think of those who knew Him best believing it was all for nothing.

Did they think He should have killed off the Roman soldiers and saved Himself to prove the power of His Father? Did they think they just wasted three years of their lives, enduring hardships as homeless travelers seeking the kindness of strangers as they tried to deliver the messages of hope, love and the promise of redemption?

Doing the right things for the right reasons is never easy. Jesus struggled with what He knew He had to do in the Garden but even as He accepted the decision of God to fulfill His mission, He was torn between what He had to do and what He wanted to do. Yet He was willing to pay that price.

Gethsemane 36Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them,“Sit here while I go over there and pray.” 37He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled.38Then he said to them,“My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”
39 Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.”
40 Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Couldn’t you men keep watch with me for one hour?” he asked Peter. 41 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”42 He went away a second time and prayed, “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.”
43 When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. 44 So he left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing.45 Then he returned to the disciples and said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Look, the hour has come, and the Son of Man is delivered into the hands of sinners. 46 Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!” Matthew 26:36-46New International Version (NIV)

We seem to have a habit of forgetting even Jesus needed support. He was filled with sorrow.

There is a quote that has always bothered me because it seems so unfair.
What does the phrase "no good deed goes unpunished" mean?

Hyun Kim, former . at U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

Written 18 Feb
For Christians, being punished or persecuted by others — even by friends and family — for doing the right thing is just par for the course. It is the epitome of martyrdom and reminds me of the Beatitudes in Matthew 5: 10–12~

“Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and celebrate, because great is your reward in heaven; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets before you…” (Matt. 5:10–12)

I also like the verse from James 1: 2–4~

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. “

But just as God had magnificent plans for Jesus and He completed the mission, God also had a mission for you. 

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13

If you are risking your life for the sake of others, you need to be reminded that ability came as a package deal. Everything you needed to pull you into that direction, was within your spirit. You wouldn't have been happy doing something selfish or for the sake of money. Still there is one more thing that was also in you from the beginning. The ability to heal from doing what was asked of you.

"It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life."  John 6:63

There is a passage that speaks directly to you if you are among those chosen to spend your life dedicated toward saving the lives of others.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."  John 15:13

That great love is why you feel so much pain within your spirit. You feel it all more than others. It is not "weakness" that consumes you, but the strength of your emotional core.

How is it that you can understand a regular person being stuck by PTSD from one event when you are enduring them over and over again but cannot understand your own pain?

The spirit within you is equipped to defeat the worst your mission did to you. You trusted the guidance of your spirit when you decided to choose the jobs as serving, protecting and defending strangers and you need to trust it now to heal.

As the followers of Jesus spent these three days in darkness, forgetting all He said would happen, so have you lived in the darkness of doubting the fact that those you served with were willing to die for you. As you did for them, but if you do not trust them enough to ask them for help to stay alive, then you need to ask yourself why you are above asking for help now when you spent your life helping others.

Do you think you are supposed to be stronger than Jesus?

38 Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”

It is true that "no good deed goes unpunished" and no good do'er is ever left to pay that price by themselves.



Let this night be the start of your own resurrection and you awake to the promises being fulfilled in your own life so you can continue to do the mission you were sent here to do. There are many more lives you can save now, but this time, you have to start with saving your own life.

The Beatitudes

He said:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

"Sometimes darkness can show you the light" Disturbed

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 1, 2021

"Sometimes darkness can show you the light" is one of the most powerful things to say. It gives hope that the dark days will not last forever. You will not always feel trapped by the pain of your memories. As long as you open your eyes, you will be shown the way out of the darkness and into the light.

Disturbed, The Light is the featured video today. If you want to save lives, this is how you do it. You give people hope that it can get better. You don't remind them of how many others have given up, but you do remind the of how many have, not only survived, but healed. Too many give up because they do not know what is possible. They do not not know how much power they have to fight against the darkness that surrounds them. 

I don't like being around negative people. I worked in a lot of offices over the years. I hung around with happy people but did not avoid negative ones. I usually tried to find out why they were the way they were. I didn't ask a thousand questions but I listened to them a thousand times, trying to figure out what they need. Sometimes they had a hard life. Knowing what that felt like, I knew what they needed to hear from me because I made it out of that darkness. Sometimes they lost a lot of people in their life. Knowing what that was like, I knew what they needed to hear.

That is what people do when they make it out of misery and into happiness.

There is not much I can say that will come close to the power of the lyrics of this song, so I am keeping this short. When you listen to it, you will feel the power of it too and then, find hope that you can not just make it out of darkness too, but pull someone else out of afterwards.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

The Light

Disturbed

Like an unsung melody

The truth is waiting there for you to find it

It's not a blight, but a remedy

A clear reminder of how it began

Deep inside your memory

Turned away as you struggled to find it

You heard the call as you walked away

A voice of calm from within the silence

And for what seemed an eternity

You're waiting, hoping it would call out again

You heard the shadow reckoning

Then your fears seemed to keep you blinded

You held your guard as you walked away

When you think all is forsaken

Listen to me now (all is not forsaken)

You need never feel broken again

Sometimes darkness can show you the light

An unforgivable tragedy

The answer isn't' where you think you'd find it

Prepare yourself for the reckoning

For when your world seems to crumble again

Don't be afraid, don't turn away

You're the one who can redefine it

Don't let hope become a memory

Let the shadow permeate your mind and

Reveal the thoughts that were tucked away

So that the door can be opened again

Within your darkest memories

Lies the answer if you dare to find it

Don't let hope become a memory

When you think all is forsaken

Listen to me now (all is not forsaken)

You need never feel broken again

Sometimes darkness can show you the light

Sickening, weakening

Don't let another somber pariah consume your soul

You need strengthening, toughening

It takes an inner dark to rekindle the fire burning in you

Ignite the fire within you

When you think all is forsaken

Listen to me now (all is not forsaken)

You need never feel broken again

Sometimes darkness can show you the light

Don't ignore, listen to me now (all is not forsaken)

You need never feel broken again

Sometimes darkness

Can show you the light

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Dan Donegan / David Draiman / Kevin Churko / Mike Wengren

The Light lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

What's too painful to remember

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 28, 2021

When you hear the song The Way We Were, what do you think about? Was it your relationship with someone else that ended? For me, it was the relationship I had with myself. Those days are now too painful to remember.

What is too painful for you to remember? Is it the life you had before "it" happened? Is it the way you used to think when you the life you were used to, was still the way it usually was? How about you know there is another time ahead for you? A time can come when you are happier and think of the days you were miserable as "too painful to remember" instead. That is what can happen when you heal.

I know I have to share things that happened in my past so that you are able to know what I dealt with, what I struggled with and how I healed. The events and residual left behind, were hard. It makes me sad to even think about those days. It is a lot better for me to talk about happier times, like now.

I don't live there anymore. All the events, the heartaches and misery are in the past. I don't dwell on them but this work has me remembering a lot of those times when I need to. Once I get out what I have to, I usually play a computer game or watch TV, and then I am done with that memory.

You have to make sense out of what happened and understand you had no power over "it" happening but you have power over it as a survivor now. Then you have to make peace with it. It takes a lot of work, but you can get there. You have to forgive yourself for whatever you got wrong up to this point because we are all just humans, untrained to deal with anything that isn't part of our usual life. We have to learn what has been haunting us, hurting us, is no longer in control. It doesn't deserve to be in our lives now. The only power PTSD has is what we allow it to have.

Once you understand PTSD, then you gain even more power over it. It ends up being drained out of you. While there are some parts of it left behind, there are tools to cope with what you cannot totally rid yourself of, but for the most part, each and everyday is what you will make out of it.

I've already healed and so can you. I left most of those days behind me because I'm too busy looking ahead to the next moment. That comes with practice and patience. It also comes with an understanding of myself. I know I did the best I could with what I knew at the time, as much as I know I wanted to learn all I could to discover what, if any, power I had. The more I learned, the more power I had over my own life and that, that is because I don't want to go back to the way I was instead of move to to what I can become.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

The Way We Were

Barbra Streisand

Memories

Light the corners of my mind

Misty watercolor memories

Of the way we were

Scattered pictures

Of the smiles we left behind

Smiles we gave to one another

For the way we were

Can it be that it was all so simple then?

Or has time re-written every line?

If we had the chance to do it all again

Tell me, would we?

Could we?

Memories

May be beautiful and yet

What's too painful to remember

We simply to choose to forget

So it's the laughter

We will remember

Whenever we remember

The way we were

The way we were

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Bergman Alan / Bergman Marilyn / Hamlisch Marvin

The Way We Were lyrics © Arlovol Music, Colgems-emi Music Inc. 

"It might seem crazy what I am 'bout to say" about PTSD

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 27, 2021

When you have PTSD, it can make you miserable. It makes it worse when you think that is the only way you can be. The thing is, getting help can make you a lot happier. Then you can change the way your family is feeling about themselves. Yes, you do have that kind of power. If you think you've been making them miserable, then it should be easy to understand that you can make them happier too.

When you are miserable, the last place you want to be is around happy people. Sitting there with your bad mood, surrounded by people enjoying their lives, sucks! If you want to stay in that mood, then you better duck out early. Sooner or later, their good mood will become too contagious to resist.

This morning I woke up at 5:00 in a bad mood. As I struggled to go back to sleep, failing at that made me angry. I gave up and got up, put on a pot of coffee and waited. A song came on the radio that made me want to scream. I could feel my blood pressure going up until it started to come down and my feet started to move. The next thing I knew, I was moving to the beat and felt happy about being up that early.

The song I heard this morning was Pharrell Williams, Happy!

How about you decide that the truth is, happiness is possible for you and then do something to get there? Getting help to heal helps you understand it. It begins to get you to think of ways to change the way you think about being a survivor. It also gives you hope of much better days.

Then, you can be one of the happy people miserable people catch it from!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Happy

Pharrell Williams

It might seem crazy what I am 'bout to say

Sunshine she's here, you can take a break

I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space

With the air, like I don't care, baby by the way

Huh (Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Here come bad news talking this and that (Yeah)

Well give me all you got, don't hold back (Yeah)

Well I should probably warn you I'll be just fine (Yeah)

No offence to you don't waste your time

Here's why

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Uh, bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down

My level's too high to bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down, I said

Bring me down, can't nothing

Bring me down

My level's too high to bring me down

Can't nothing, bring me down, I said

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Uh, bring me down (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Can't nothing (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Bring me down, my level's too high

To bring me down (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Can't nothing (Happy, happy, happy, happy)

Bring me down, I said

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you (ayy, ayy, ayy)

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you (hey)

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

Come on

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Williams Pharrell L

Happy lyrics © Emi April Music Inc., Emi Blackwood Music Inc., More Water From Nazareth 

but normal never really existed

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 25, 2021

Why would anyone want to go back to normal? Normal accomplished nothing. Imagine if the first humans settled for "normal" they wouldn't have hunted, gotten into caves or started fires. Someone had to think that things had to change.

Hundreds of thousands of years ago, around 62 miles west of what would eventually become Marrakesh, a group of people lived in a cave overlooking a lush Moroccan landscape. They rested there, building fires to keep themselves warm. They hunted there, sharpening stone tools to bring down animals. And they died there, leaving their bones behind in the dirt. At the time, there would have been nothing particularly notable about these cave-dwellers. They were yet more Homo sapiens, members of a nascent ape species that had spread across Africa. But in their death, they have become singularly important.

“The new finds indicate that Homo sapiens is much older and had already spread across all of Africa by 300,000 years ago. They really show that the African story of our species was more complex than what we used to think.”

The Atlantic

Everything we do and have in our time, exists because people were not satisfied with normal. The food we eat, stated with someone wondering what it would taste like. Had no one invented fire, then eating raw meat could have killed them off. The clothes we wear started with ancient people killing animals, eating the meat, using their bones for tools and their hides for shelter, just as they used their fur for clothing. All the became normal for a while. Then someone else thought of something else to improve what was acceptable. Changing became normal.

Mankind wouldn't have gone from using fire and living in caves, to smart homes with everything electrical operating everything to make our lives easier, had it not been for the desire to change. We wouldn't have gone from walking everywhere, to riding horses, to buggies, to automobiles, trains and planes, if they accepted what was normal.

You may have convinced yourself that normal was working for you before you survived whatever caused PTSD. When you really think about it, you realize that you kept changing things. Changed from being a dependent infant, to adult and in control over your own life. You changed from student to worker and the chances are, you had many jobs because you needed a change...or were forced to. You went from one relationship and friendship to others. It is for sure you are still not wearing the same clothes you were when you were an infant. How many times have you changed the style? How many times have you changed your hairs style? Change is normal.

When you have PTSD, it is also change. Your life changed from what was acceptable for you, to victim, to survivor within seconds. Normal may be something you convinced yourself is something you want to go back to, but normal never really existed. It was habits you felt comfortable with doing. Are you comfortable with your habits now?

The really great thing about humans is they share how to do things. They have an idea that starts with need and then they make it happen. They pass it on and then someone else has a better idea. That pass on that so that others discover their discovery. Life gets easier for everyone until that becomes normal for a while and then, change comes again.

Even you can change again by learning from those who were not satisfied with what everyone else thought was impossible to change. People have been suffering traumatic events since the beginning of time and they paid the price after they survived it. It took someone talk about it and someone else to wonder why, before someone else discovered how to make life better. Now we know that wanting to go back to "normal" is a waste of time. It is far better to want to have a better than normal life.

Mankind's earliest literature tells us that a significant proportion of military casualties are psychological, and that witnessing death can leave chronic psychological symptoms. As we are reminded in Deuteronomy 20:1-9, military leaders have long been aware that many soldiers must be removed from the frontline because of nervous breakdown, which is often contagious: When thou goest out to battle against thine enemies, and seest horses, and chariots, and a people more than thou... the officers shall say, What man is there that is fearful and fainthearted? Let him go and return unto his house, lest his brethren's heart faint as well as his heart. (King Jame's Version ) PubMed Center

That is when the journey from before trauma to after it was documented. Research has been going on for far too long to ignore how dissatisfied people were with accepting it as normal to them. If it is not acceptable to you, then discover as much as you can, then think about how to change it again. How can you change your life, so you can pass it on to others? If you already did, then how did you do it? Everything that started throughout the history of man, has been shared and change, "change is gonna come" again.

Today the featured video is Sam Cooke, Change Is Gonna Come.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

A Change Is Gonna Come

Sam Cooke

I was born by the river, in a little tent

Oh, and just like the river

I've been running ever since

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

It's been too hard living

But I'm afraid to die

'Cause I don't know what's up there

Beyond the sky

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

I go to the movie

And I go downtown

Somebody keep telling me

Don't hang around

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know, a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

Then I go to my brother

And I say, brother, help me please

But he winds up, knockin' me

Back down on my knees

Oh, there been times that I thought

I couldn't last for long

But now I think I'm able, to carry on

It's been a long

A long time coming

But I know a change gonna come

Oh, yes it will

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Sam Cooke 

Israel and Indonesia prove PTSD survivors matter

I was shocked to see that PTSD Patrol had over 4,000 page views yesterday. I feel blessed and it shows that PTSD does not decide to strike nations. It strikes survivors no matter where they live.

Page views for PTSD Patrol 

last 7 days

All time

Page views Wounded Times 

last 7 days

All time

Everybody hurts, sometimes

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 16, 2021

When you are hurting, and surrounded by people who are happy, it can make your pain stronger. You may wonder what the hell you did wrong to feel so miserable. You may think about how it would be easy to pretend you are happy too. Then it dawns on you, they may be pretending too. "Everybody hurts, sometimes." This is why the featured video for today is R.E.M. Everybody Hurts.

Sometimes just knowing we are not alone helps ease our pain. Sometimes it takes someone showing us kindness, reminding us that we do matter, that helps. The thing is, once we see that everybody hurts, we realize that everyone is not always what they seem to be.

Members of Congress are starting to talk more about what they went through during the Capitol riot. Think about how many people were there that horrible day. All the members of the Senate and their staff. All the members of the House and their staff. The Capitol police officers and reporters were there too. How many do you think are struggling but are afraid to ask for help because most of the people are hiding their own pain? The ones who are talking are giving the others permission to stop hiding what they are going through.

"This is not something I ever expected to experience — not something that I anticipated," Kildee said. "But I'm just really grateful we connected and I got help when I needed it the most."

On Twitter afterwards, the lawmaker recognized many people deal with PTSD "quietly, privately, painfully, silently and alone."

"Too often, there is a stigma attached with seeking help," Kildee wrote. "That needs to change."

 

Congressman Has Been Seeing Therapist to Treat PTSD from U.S. Capitol Attack: ‘Thought I Was Fine’ "Too often, there is a stigma attached with seeking help," Michigan Rep. Dan Kildee tweeted after he shared his experience in an interview with NBC Nightly News PEOPLE By Sean Neumann April 13, 2021

Most people with PTSD struggle with struggling. It is almost as if they admit they are not OK, others will feel sorry for them, or think they are weak, defective in some way. The thing is not wanting them to worry about you, isn't rational because they already are worried about you. If they know you, then they know you are not acting like "you" and are probably already worried about you. They'll worry because you are not telling them you need help, or even trust them enough to talk to them.

Needing help and wanting it are two different things. No one wants to go through something like the attack on the Capitol. No one wants to have to suffer after it was over. No one wants to wake up in the middle of the night from terrible nightmares, or see it all come back in flashbacks. No one wants to push people out of their lives at the same time they need them in it. No one wants panic attacks, mood swings, paranoia, rage or sadness so deep they no longer find joy in anything. No one wants to drink themself into mindless numbness so they stop feeling everything. No one wants their kids to be afraid of a parent during a overreaction to everything that happens, or to blame themselves because they think it is their fault it is happening.

So, is it you don't need help, or you don't want to ask for it? If you have that going on in your life, then why in the hell wouldn't you want help?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Everybody Hurts

R.E.M.

When your day is long

And the night, the night is yours alone

When you're sure you've had enough

Of this life, well hang on

Don't let yourself go

'Cause everybody cries

Everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong

Now it's time to sing along

When your day is night alone (hold on, hold on)

If you feel like letting go (hold on)

If you think you've had too much

Of this life, well hang on

'Cause everybody hurts

Take comfort in your friends

Everybody hurts

Don't throw your hand, oh no

Don't throw your hand

If you feel like you're alone

No, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life

The days and nights are long

When you think you've had too much

Of this life to hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes

Everybody cries

Everybody hurts, sometimes

And everybody hurts sometimes

So hold on, hold on

Hold on, hold on, hold on

Hold on, hold on, hold on

Everybody hurts

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Mills / Berry / Buck / Stipe

Everybody Hurts lyrics © Night Garden Music

If PTSD had an anthem...it should be HELP!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 12, 2021

Most people start singing a song whenever they hear it. They can't help it. It makes them happy to sing it. It is as infectious as it was when it was released in 1965! The song, naturally is the Beatles HELP! It was so popular, they even had a movie with that title. So why is it so much easier for everyone to sing that song, than it is to do it?

If PTSD had an anthem, it should be HELP! How much clearer does it have to be? Why the hell should anyone have a problem asking for help when they need it but have no problem, if they can carry a tune or not, to sing this song loud and clear? Has that ever dawned on anyone?

"And now my life has changed in oh so many ways"

Isn't that what having PTSD is like? Your life does change in so many ways. The thing is, getting help can change your life for the better. Wouldn't it make more sense to actually ask for help to be happier, than it is to settle for being happy singing this song for a few minutes? 

Common sense needs to come back into the conversation we've been having about PTSD because we're all tied of hearing the doom and gloom. All that has done is tell us that we should never expect to be happy again. Where is the hope in that? Someone said that asking for help is a sign of weakness but all that meant was the hope the had was weak and they wanted everyone else to be miserable too!

Isn't it time to stop singing the same tune and start asking someone for help in real life? Someone who can actually help you? Asking for help is normal. It is human. Won't you please, please, ask for help when you need it?

UPDATE I am adding closed captioning to the videos.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

HELP

The Beatles

I need somebody

(Help!) not just anybody

(Help!) you know I need someone

Help!

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured (but now these days are gone)

(And now I find) Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me?

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways (and now my life has changed)

My independence seems to vanish in the haze

But every now and then I feel so insecure (I know that I)

I know that I just need you like I've never done before

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me

When I was younger, so much younger than today

I never needed anybody's help in any way

But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured (but now these days are gone)

(And now I find) now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down

And I do appreciate you being 'round

Help me get my feet back on the ground

Won't you please, please help me, help me, help me, ooh

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: John Lennon / Paul McCartney

Help! lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Downtown Music Publishing

and the movie HELP

the song I needed to hear

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 12, 2021

We haven't talked much about why music is so important when you are trying to heal PTSD. It has the power to change your mood. Sometimes you hear a song and you feel worse than you did. That is the time to find something else to listen to. It doesn't mean it is a bad song or you suddenly don't like it. It just means that is not the song you need to hear at that moment in your life.

There were a lot of times when my life sucked the most I'd hear a song and felt like the last thread of hope was being cut off. Other times I'd hear the same song and have a totally different reaction to it. Sometimes a sad song would comfort me, but other times it would remind me of why I felt sad in the first place and then felt even worse. Music is all relative to, not just the mood you are in, but the mood you want to get into.

Today the featured video is Dobie Grey, Drift Away! "When my mind is free," and I can drift away with the song it can be wonderful. This morning I heard it doing errands. I got so carried away by it, I almost forgot where we were going. It was a song I not only wanted to hear, I needed to hear. It took me out of my life for a little while and changed my mood for the better. We ended up enjoying the rest of the day.

There are some songs that seem more powerful because the singers are famous people. You know they are rich and probably have everything they want, but they manage to sing about being lonely. Either they are drawing from a time in their lives when they were lonely or, they very well could have been lonely when they recorded it. You can always tell when the words are more than just words to them.

Listen to songs you need to hear depending on where you are emotionally and can either find comfort or be uplifted by them. If they are making you feel worse, then change the station or find another one from your music collection. The point is to be connected in a positive way to the song and disconnected from negativity feeding your emotions.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Drift Away

Dobie Gray 

Day after day I'm more confused

But I look for the light through the pourin' rain

You know, that's a game, that I hate to loose

I'm feelin' the strain, ain't it a shame

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Won't you take me away

Beginin' to think, that I'm wastin' time

And I don't understand the things I do

The world outside looks so unkind

I'm countin' on you, you can carry me through

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Won't you take me away

And when my mind is free

You know your melody can move me

And when I'm feelin' blue

The guitars come through to soothe me

Thanks for the joy you've given me

I want you to know I believe in your song

And rhythm, and rhyme, and harmony

You helped me along, you're makin' me strong

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Won't you take me away

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Give me the beat boys and free my soul

I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Won't you take me away

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Mentor Williams

Drift Away lyrics © Almo Music Corp. 

Yes, happiness make PTSD miserable

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
April 9, 2021

I can't help it! In some ways, I am still 12. Doesn't matter I've been that way for over 40 years because it is fun and helps me to have a more hopeful attitude. In some ways I really haven't grown up. One of my favorite movies is Shrek. When I lived in Florida, a bunch of us went to the movies every week. I am a Chaplain, yet one of my favorite grownup movies is The Hangover. I laughed so hard I cried. What made it funnier was the reaction of my friends. They were shocked I didn't hate it and they cracked up laughing too, which made me laugh even more.

Another thing that I think is funny is, I have short term memory loss and so does my husband. That can frustrate the hell out of anyone, but it is how you respond to screwing up that will either make you miserable or laugh a lot!

I bought a Glade air freshener with a light sensor on it and brought it home. It didn't work, so I brought it back to the store. I told them it was defective and got another one. I brought that one home and it didn't work either. My husband came over to me, gave me one of "those" faces and asked, "Don't you have to plug it in first?" I laughed my ass off so much that my cheeks hurt.

The featured video today is Justin Timberlake, Can't Stop The Feeling. When I was looking for the video, I found the one from Trolls. Princess Poppy was asked by a group, "Do you think I can be happy?"

"Of course! It's inside all of us!"

I am never sure why so many survivors of PTSD think that being happy again is not possible for them. It doesn't matter how long ago it happened, or what things were like for you a second ago, because you can change every moment onward. It is all inside of you too! Not just feeling happy again, but each step you take to heal, robs power away from PTSD. It wants you to be miserable. Hell, it not only wants you to be that way but wants you to believe you deserve to suffer instead of enjoy your life.

It wants you to stop doing what you loved to do. It wants you to stop writing, stop painting, stop playing music and stop dancing on your feet or in your chair. Yes, happiness make PTSD miserable and it starts to give up controlling your life. Isn't it time you did stop the feeling misery and started feeling happy too?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Can't Stop the Feeling! 

Justin Timberlake

I got this feeling inside my bones

It goes electric, wavey when I turn it on

All through my city, all through my home

We're flying up, no ceiling, when we in our zone

I got that sunshine in my pocket

Got that good song in my feet

I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops

I can't take my eyes up off it, moving so phenomenally

You gone like the way we rock it, so don't stop

Under the lights when everything goes

Nowhere to hide when I'm getting you close

When we move, well, you already know

So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

Ooh, it's something magical

It's in the air, it's in my blood, it's rushing on

I don't need no reason, don't need control

I fly so high, no ceiling, when I'm in my zone

Cause I got that sunshine in my pocket

Got that good song in my feet

I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops

I can't take my eyes up off it, moving so phenomenally

You gon' like the way we rock it, so don't stop

Under the lights when everything goes

Nowhere to hide when I'm getting you close

When we move, well, you already know

So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So just dance, dance, dance

I can't stop the feeling

So keep dancing, come on

I can't stop the, I can't stop the

I can't stop the, I can't stop the

I can't stop the feeling

Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance

(I can't stop the feeling)

Feeling good, good, creeping up on you

So just dance, dance, dance, come on

(I can't stop the feeling)

All those things I should do to you

But you dance, dance, dance

(I can't stop the feeling)

And ain't nobody leaving soon, so keep dancing

Everybody sing

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Wanna see you move your body

(I can't stop the feeling)

Got this feeling in my body

Break it down

Got this feeling in my body

Can't stop the feeling

Got this feeling in my body, come on

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Justin Timberlake / Max Martin / Shellback

Can't Stop the Feeling! lyrics © Universal Music - Z Tunes Llc, Tennman Tunes, Dwa Songs 

And now for the grownup video....