sometimes the most powerful thing is what you believe

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 28, 2021

Today's feature video has me very confused. The first video I saw was a lyric video and gave me great comfort. The other one was a video where actors had me thinking a totally different way.

That is what life is like. If you don't know what the message of PTSD is, then you think from your imagination. Often that is not a good place to spend your time. If you know what the message is telling you, then you can imagine yourself healing and life getting better. Sometimes it is not just a matter of what you know, or what you just think you know, but sometimes the most powerful thing is what you believe.

If you believe there is no hope for you, then you are trapped. If you believe in something that offers hope, then you have enough fuel to seek it out. 

For me, I am sustained by faith and hope. I take comfort from what I know and even more from what I believe. When I heard Don't Deserve You, all I could think about was Jesus and how no one really deserves Him or what He did for us.

You never give up

When I'm falling apart

Your arms are always open wide

And You're quick to forgive

When I make a mistake

You love me in the blink of an eye

I don't deserve Your love

But You give it to me anyway

Can't get enough

You're everything I need

And when I walk away

You take off running and come right after me

But what if you do not believe Jesus was real? You can still understand because you could have been involved in an accident where someone else did not survive. You could have survived combat. You could have survived one of the mass shootings where you lost a friend. You may have thought they deserved to live more than you did. That can haunt you. Sometimes, what we imagine, is what determines the rest of our lives as survivors.

I am Greek Orthodox and believe in the Holy Trinity. For me, that was constantly part of my life. My parents passed away. My brothers passed away. People came into and out of my life, all my life. Each one became a part of me, for sadly for worse sometimes, but mostly for better. What I believe plays a huge part in how I think about music and the message I take from it.

This is the video I took great comfort from.

If the message you receive is one of comfort, then it changes your mood for the better. It fills you up with hope and reminds you that you do matter. It tells you that you are not alone believing you don't deserve someone loving you but when they do, you understand that someone believes you are worth loving.

When we understand that we cannot change what has been, helps us know, we have something to build what we want become.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Don't Deserve You 

Plumb 

You're the first face that I see

And the last thing I think about

You're the reason that I'm alive

You're what I can't live without

You're what I can't live without

You never give up

When I'm falling apart

Your arms are always open wide

And You're quick to forgive

When I make a mistake

You love me in the blink of an eye

I don't deserve Your love

But You give it to me anyway

Can't get enough

You're everything I need

And when I walk away

You take off running and come right after me

It's what You do

And I don't deserve You

You're the light inside my eyes

You give me a reason to keep trying

You give me more than I could dream

And You bring me to my knees

You bring me to my knees

Your heart is gold and how am I the one

That You've chosen to love

I still can't believe that You're right next to me

After all that I've done

I don't deserve Your love

But You give it to me anyway

Can't get enough

You're everything I need

And when I walk away

You take off running and come right after me

It's what You do

And I don't deserve You

I don't deserve a chance like this

I don't deserve a love that gives me everything

You're everything I want

I don't deserve Your love

But You give it to me anyway

Can't get enough

You're everything I need

And when I walk away

You take off running and come right after me

It's what You do

And I don't deserve You

And I don't deserve You

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Matt Bronleewe / Tiffany Arbuckle / Paul Van Dyke

Don't Deserve You lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Essential Music Publishing

This is the video that got me confused!

be between their pain and glory

The following is from my business site

Moral Mortal

Kathie Costos
February 25, 2021

Do you want to be the best thing that ever happened to them? Isn't that why you got into the mental health field? You remember what they looked like the first time they came to see you. Their life was a mess and they were depressed, feeling lost and confused. They took their last bit of hope and reached out to you for help. You also know the rush you get when you see someone walk out your door for the last time, with a smile on their face. It is the one field where not having returning customers is success!

With so much competition out there, you need all the help you can get to help more people. I know that feeling. For 38 years, I dedicated my life to helping veterans and families find their way toward healing...by sending them to therapists when they were ready for more help than I could give.

Back in 1993 when I started working online, I was easy to find. Not much competition back then. The other good thing is, everyone was in the work for the right reasons. Most of us had personal connections to PTSD. We understood it, lived with it, and learned how to take back our lives from it. We passed on that knowledge we obtained the hard way to make it easier for others.

When the veteran suicide report from the Department of Veterans Affairs came out in 2012, there was a flood of people rushing to push the headline of "22 a day" when they didn't bother to read the whole report. Thousands of charities popped up and it became a billion dollar industry. The pioneers in the field, doing the work for the right reasons, we pushed out of the way. Most of the people I knew back when we started, gave up. I almost did too but I had some support from professionals convincing me that  clearing the way toward hope was essential.

With over 600 videos, three books, thousands of articles, almost 4 decades of research, and lives saved, I want you to feel like you are the best thing that ever happened to your patients. That is why I am offering a service geared to your success story. 

I can set up a blog for you, provide posts written specifically for your work and help you reach more lives you can turn around.

Those are the results for Wounded Times

Those are the results for PTSD Patrol

Call me and let's talk about how you can help more people, like me, since I went to therapy a couple of times. My therapist was one of the best things that ever happened to me. She encouraged me to write my first book!

407-754-7526 Florida number but now live in New Hampshire!

You're The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me 

I've had my share of life's ups and downs

But fate's been kind, the downs have been few

I guess you could say that I've been lucky

And I guess you could say, it's all because of you

If anyone should ever write my life story

For whatever reason there might be

You'd be there between each line of pain and glory

'Cause you're the best thing that ever happened to me

You're the best thing that ever happened to me

Oh, there have been times when the times were so hard

But somehow, some way I'd made it through

And for every moment I've spent hurting

There's been moments spent loving you

If anyone should ever write my life story

For whatever reason there might be

You'd be there between each line of pain and glory

'Cause you're the best thing that ever happened to me

You're the best thing that ever happened to me

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: James D. Weatherly

You're the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group 

healing the broken hearted

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 26, 2021

Honoring your feelings is sometimes really hard. It is especially hard if you had someone in your life, who is now out of your life. It is hard when they pass away, just as it is hard when they walk away. When they leave, they take a piece of your with them.

Honor that loss and let out all the bad emotions, so good ones can move in. A day will come when you stop thinking about the loss and remember the good they put into your life.

Today the featured video is What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted.

"I'll be looking everyday, I know I'm gonna find a way

Nothing's gonna stop me now

I'll find a way somehow

And I'll be searching everywhere

I know I gotta find a way

I'll be looking"

There are so many reasons people leave us. When you have PTSD, that loss hits harder. Maybe they passed away during the event that caused PTSD. Maybe they left you because of PTSD in them, or you. Maybe you reached out and they walked away. Maybe you were hurting so much you pushed them away. 

Honor the grief and loss. Honor whatever you are going through so you can heal. When you are ready, someone else may come into your life and you'll find a reason to trust them. Someone will help you heal your broken heart and fill the space the other one left empty.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted

Jimmy Ruffin 

As I walk this land with broken dreams

I have visions of many things

But happiness is just an illusion

Filled with sadness and confusion

What becomes of the broken-hearted

Who had love that's now departed?

I know I've got to find 

Some kind of peace of mind

Maybe

The roots of love grow all around

But for me they come a-tumblin' down

Every day heartaches grow a little stronger

I can't stand this pain much longer

I walk in shadows searching for light

Cold and alone, no comfort in sight

Hoping and praying for someone to care

Always moving and goin' nowhere

What becomes of the broken-hearted

Who had love that's now departed?

I know I've got to find 

Some kind of peace of mind

Help me

I'm searching, though I don't succeed

But someone look, there's a growing need

Oh, he is lost, there's no place for beginning

All that's left is an unhappy ending

Now, becomes of the broken-hearted

Who had love that's now departed?

I know I've got to find

Some kind of peace of mind

I'll be searching everywhere

Just to find someone to care

I'll be looking everyday, I know I'm gonna find a way

Nothing's gonna stop me now

I'll find a way somehow

And I'll be searching everywhere

I know I gotta find a way

I'll be looking

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: James Anthony Dean / Paul Riser / William Henry Witherspoonn

What Becomes Of The Brokenhearted lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

Robson and Jerome - What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted?

PTSD: last time for their last chance?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 24, 2021

How many times should you try to get someone you love to get help? How many different ways do you try to explain it, get them to stop denying what you see so clearly, and seek help? How many times do you put up with their mood swings, paranoia, overblown reactions, accusations and general nastiness, before you have had enough? How many times do you take them walking out the door and not knowing if you want them to come back in it again, before you start to think about changing the locks?

When you live with someone with PTSD and they refuse to get help, there are so many questions you have, while feeling lost, as if there is no one who will understand what it is like to be you. You don't want to tell the people you work with. You may be covering it up with your family, making excuses for them not being at family events, calling their boss because they won't go to work or even call in sick. If you have kids, you may be trying to cover it up so they don't end up blaming themselves. You know what that feels like since you have been doing a great job blaming yourself.

So when do you get to your last time for their last chance?

Before you decide anything, you need to be prepared for what comes with your decision. If you give them the choice between getting help or getting out, they may be very open to saving the relationship. They may not be willing to listen, no matter how many times you try to explain it to them, and they may  walk out of your life, or take their own life. It happens both ways.

Isn't it better to do what you can before you have to get to that point? Learn what PTSD is so you understand it for your own sake. Help your kids understand it for their sake. You cannot control what he/she does no matter how hard you try and you cannot predict what their rock bottom will finally be, anymore than you can predict what they will do when they reach it. You can only control what you do.

When PTSD was the worst for us, we had separate lives. I got tired of making excuses for why things were the way they were. In other words, I was tired of living a lie. So I told the truth and did what I wanted to do, went where I wanted to go and let him know he was welcome to come with me or not.

The trick was, not holding a grudge if he didn't want to go. I had a good time and went home happy that I decided to go.

Everyone reaches limits but not everyone has the same outcome. Just understand that you have to make your own choices and so do they. Give them as much as you can and then decide what is right for you. At least when you make an informed decision, you'll understand whatever they choose, has nothing to do with you...it is all about them and what they decide to do for themselves.

The Last Time

Rolling Stones 

Well I told you once and I told you twice

But ya never listen to my advice

You don't try very hard to please me

With what you know it should be easy

Well this could be the last time

This could be the last time

Maybe the last time

I don't know, oh no, oh no

Well, I'm sorry girl but I can't stay

Feelin' like I do today

It's too much pain and too much sorrow

Guess I'll feel the same tomorrow

Well this could be the last time

This could be the last time

Maybe the last time

I don't know, oh no, oh no

Well this could be the last time

This could be the last time

Maybe the last time

I don't know, oh no, oh no

Well I told you once and I told you twice

That someone will have to pay the price

But here's a chance to change your mind

'Cause I'll be gone a long, long time

Well this could be the last time

This could be the last time

Maybe the last time

I don't know, oh no, oh no

Last time baby

To say no more

Baby I don't know

Well I don't know

Well, I don't know

I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Keith Richards / Mick Jagger

The Last Time lyrics © Abkco Music, Inc 

Or do you give them shelter? 

Gimme Shelter

Rolling Stones

Ooh, a storm is threatening

My very life today

If I don't get some shelter

Ooh yeah I'm gonna fade away

War, children

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

War, children

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

Ooh, see the fire is sweepin'

Our streets today

Burns like a red coal carpet

Mad bull lost its way

War, children

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

War, children

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

Rape, murder, it's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

Rape, murder, yeah, it's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

Rape, murder, it's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

Mmm, a flood is threatening

My very life today

Gimme, gimme shelter

Or I'm gonna fade away

War, children

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

It's just a shot away

I tell you love, sister

It's just a kiss away

It's just a kiss away

It's just a kiss away

It's just a kiss away

It's just a kiss away

Kiss away, kiss away

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Jagger Mick / Jagger Michael Phillip

Gimme Shelter lyrics © Mirage Music Int. Ltd. C/o Essex Music Int. L 

Remember it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

I am everyday people, Yahoo!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
February 23, 2021

We need a chair dancing song today! Things are so crazy and everyone is bickering with everyone else. It is almost as if they are looking for something to be disagreeable about. Isn't it better to try to see what you have in common, at least for a while?

How many times have you been around someone who is cranky and ended up taking that negative attitude onto your own day? You could be at a cash register and the cashier seems like they want to just bite your head off. You can judge them or understand they are just as human as you are. Maybe they have a hard time in their own personal life, then again, it could be something as simple as a lot of cranky people coming into the store that did.

What do you do? Do you just take the bad mood and let it change the mood you're in, or, do you change the cashier's mood and make it better? 

Having PTSD can put a lot of negative emotions in you and you can end up passing them onto your family. If you see them being miserable, you may say that you don't want to be a burden to them anymore. You may think of taking your own life, but the thing is, that puts a lifetime burden on them. Isn't it better to stay in your life and do what you can in a positive way to be happier and make them happier too?

This is why today the featured video is, Sly and the Family Stone, Everyday People. "We got to live together" so wouldn't it be so much better to be happier about it instead of being miserable?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Everyday People

Sly and the Family Stone 

Sometimes I'm right and I can be wrong

My own beliefs are in my song

The butcher, the banker, the drummer and then

Makes no difference what group I'm in

I am everyday people, yeah yeah

There is a blue one who can't accept

The green one for living with

A fat one tryin' to be a skinny one

Different strokes for different folks

And so on and so on and scooby dooby dooby

Ooh sha sha

We got to live together

I am no better and neither are you

We're all the same whatever we do

You love me you hate me

You know me and then

You can't figure out the bag I'm in

I am everyday people

There is a long hair

That doesn't like the short hair

For being such a rich one

That will not help the poor one

Different strokes for different folks

And so on and so on scooby dooby dooby

Ooh sha sha

We got to live together

There is a yellow one that won't

Accept the black one

That won't accept the red one

That won't accept the white one

Different strokes for different folks

And so on and so on and

Scooby dooby dooby

Ooh sha sha

I am everyday people

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Sylvester Stewart

Everyday People lyrics © Mijac Music